When I go out and see others hanging out..... having fun And here am I.....eye contact is even a struggle for me Just can't describe this sorrow Fact I am 24 ....and these teenage kids are more confident .... really bothers me I am putting all effort But these mental blocks are huge My father advise me to interact with people..... But no one has interest in me..... To be honest Now I am losing hope on this reboot too But still I can't I know what advice ..... you all will give......but it's quite difficult to express myself.....(not writing this for sympathy) But these 6-7 years of depression and pmo has really wrecked my personality Now my only worry is my failing career.... So if anyone of you has been in this situation.....how you dealt with this
I can literally see it in your way of writing.. ( your sorrow) I read about a nice practice a while ago, where all you gotta do is go out , pick a place where many people walk by, and sit there ,stay there,for hours. In the guide you were suposed to sit on your bottom ,not like a bench or something. You will notice that very few people even care about you being there, you will gain more confidence sitting around people. Just getting used with seeing and having plenty of other people looking at you. You can try it. I definitely wantet to try it but I'm already quite healed. Still, I might get to try it one day to fully boost my confidence.
Comparison is the thief of joy, and also its a common cognitive distortion to think you know more than you do about what's going on with other people. So first off throw that out. Start doing basic breath meditation if you're not already. Start working out if you're not already. Resistance training is good for releasing testosterone. Study and practice this - Read and apply my post here - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/shyness-and-social-awkwardness.215765/#post-1906523
Yes I can understand..... I know there can be few areas in which I can be better than them.....but this is really exhausting and frustrating...... Yeah.....you know.....I don't fake happiness like other people......if I am not feeling good .....then I can't act as a joyful person.....whereas....most people these days are social media oriented.......they pretend to have a perfect life ....which is good to some extent......but ultimately .... behind the scenes.....they are also sad ....I practice meditation occasionally...... it's focusing on my breath.... Now I have also started morning walks ....and yoga is also there.... Thanks a lot man....and I will sure check this video and thread too
Practice going out by yourself and getting comfortable in your own skin. If you're old enough to drink, go to a pizza pub with a book. Make small-talk with people. If you're not comfortable in your own skin, why? Is it your physique, work on it and get in shape; wear well fitting clothes that you're comfortable in.
But practice is quite nerve wrecking Especially lot of pressure.....tempts me to watch porn And it's only 8 days without porn
No problem man. I used to be painfully shy a while back. So much so that I would rather go running in the dark evening rather than the day time. That's how bad my self-confidence was. The person I am today is a total 180 from that person in the past that I described. Anyone can change.
I think sometimes I got paranoid As if everyone is judging me and by body language This motivates and also makes me nervous..... Recently I met a psychologist.....and she told me that there is a cycle of my patterns...... My next meeting is on 18th And I am anxious for it too
Yeah, I would say that for most people who are painfully shy, most of it is just an irrational fear/paranoia. Most people are too busy doing their own thing to be so focused on others, and if they do focus on them, it is for a short while like until they've walked past.
Hey OP, I am currently 26 and I feel like I have huge mental blocks as well, although no one has advised me to interact with people I attempt to do that on my own, but yeah it's immensely tough. Please don't lose hope on this reboot! I have also been dealing with depression for what feels like a decade and I just recently lost a job so I am barely hanging in there, I am so thankful for family. Some of my best days have been to try and shrug off all the negative things people might say and I engulf myself in positive songs or videos in order to move forward. I know it can get better if we keep talking about it! I hope you are doing ok today or have had a better day compared to the non interactive ones.
Hi brother Yeah it's very tough The fact that I am dealing with this since 6-7 years....is just so painful to describe..... Yeah.... reboot is my only option .... I am unemployed.....I feel bad for my parents..... Yeah....I am trying different ways to develop interests Sometimes I feel to not do anything...... I will still do my best.... No matter how many times I got embarrassed.....fail..... rejected.....I will try and try.... Thanks for your time
As long as we still have a small light within us that can never be extinguished...no matter what storms may come our way. I'm glad I could make the time to listen to you and let you know you're not alone in this fight.
You sure type a lot of dots. I felt the same so I didn't went outside at all, then I was forced to go outside, it got a bit better.
Haha.... that's my way of expressing pause Well I am also getting forced to go outside Which is good......but sometimes I got very much panicked Even speaking become difficult
You’ve got to have interest in others, show interest in them and many will show interest in you. Selfish thinking is “they aren’t interested in me”. Well why are “they” interesting? Obviously you’ve got to gear it towards people with some similar interests to yourself. I’m learning too, to show interest in others aspirations and not just my own. It’s surprisngly hard to do but wonderful if you can get good at it!