How is it that PAs are lucky enough to be able to have a SO, despite the fact that (from personal experience) porn ruins your energy, boosts your anxiety, and deprives you of your ability to maintain good conversations? Is it luck, or something?
It is balance in universe. There are women that need to be treated the way their fathers treat them or their mothers. Subconscious stuff. That is not a happy relationship that I describe. And I know I overgeneralize here. Just giving you food for thought.
As an ex SO most women either were lied to about the PMO addiction and then married the man not knowing or the addiction developed in the relationship. As a woman I can say when I found out about the addiction I was initially willing to stay with him and help him recover. Everyone has issues and if someone you love is ill or struggling you don’t just walk away, and I think most women feel that way. In my case however I was the only one trying and all he was doing was lying. He had DE and our sex life was horrible but I was trying to help while I got lied to. We were engaged and I left, it was the lying not the addiction. I think it’s unfair to assume all women who stay with PMO addicts have issues.
I'm not sure. But it doesn't matter. Ultimate fulfillment lies in a relationship built upon mutual love and trust; without fully relying on physical attraction and lustful mating sex. Finding that solace is simply not compatible with being a PA. People in such relationships are depriving themselves of greater satisfaction they have never taken the time to discover. I still have yet to have ever had a SO, but I wouldn't trade places with a PA who does.
People who don't have relationships with women or who have never had any think it is some unattainable feat for a select few when it's one of the most common, basic things across humanity. It's hard for someone to accept it's not a big deal because they haven't experienced it but it really isn't. Once you realize that you'll have a much easier time because you won't be anchored by all this psychological baggage.
It’s when you make another person sick when they are not for attention that’s the by proxy part. What you describe is munchausen. Usually a mom who makes the kid sick. I don’t see how it’s relevant here.
I agree with you totally. It is not fun and makes recovery harder. I don’t recommend getting into a relationship if you are not pmo free. What I mean is most men with SOs were in the relationship before the pmo started or are married with kids. Harder to just leave or give up.
Ah I see, I'm probably biased since I'm young and didn't look at it that way. Still, I think the problem is the same - it's deep-rooted and is a part of the primitive lustful mindset men can soccomb to. If your in love and committed to a partner, porn especially just doesn't fit into that equation. Pmo can be an outlet that compensates for missing arousal or men can just be naturally tempted by it's allure. There are many potential triggers. No matter the cause it is a dangerous pleasure incompatible with being fully dedicated to a woman imo.