Hey everyone. I've started NoFap for like 3 days now (no porn and no masturbation), and I'm going to be meeting up with this girl for the second time, and were obviously gonna have sex again but then my mind kind of goes back to the film "Something About Mary" where the guy has a wank to reset himself and not be in a position where he'll blow his load too quickly. This kind of freaked me out, the last time I ejaculated was days ago and the next time I cum will be with this girl and something tells me I will just cum straight away. But is there any benefits to my performance sexually when I'm holding back from masturbation, I would imagine holding back from watching porn would help, but what about masturbation? If this does increase the chance of ejaculating too quickly is there anything that can help me last longer?
You need to do pelvic floor exercises to strengthen the pelvic floor therefore allowing to the strenght to 'hold back;. Secondly, think about dead fish or something like that. Thirdly, after you start seeing her daily, the problem will pass.
You can increase the duration of the foreplay and dedicate your main effort to oral sex. This way you can at least provide her pleasure without risking to ejaculate early. What comes after oral is a different story and I second eltigre238 in this area.
Thanks for the advice, but what I'm really trying to understand If there are benefits to in terms of sexual performance when it comes to NoFap, in my situation I'm not masturbating or watching porn. Or is the legend that masturbating before sex a better way to avoid blowing your load really quickly.
I used to be a strong believer in "unloading the gun" before going on dates or having sex with real women in order to increase my performance. However, results have always been mixed. On my last streak, part of what caused me to end it was that it was apparent I was going to get some real sex soon -- major anxiety about how long I'd last, etc etc. All my whacking didn't help since I still had anxiety. Fast forward to last weekend: there I was, on day 10 when a chick I dated 3 years ago hits me up on FB an asks if I want to get a drink with her. After teasing her about how I couldn't commit to that, I finally meet up with her. Keep in mind, old me would have spanked it at least once the the idea of getting some. The evening goes pretty well and I purposefully am not entertaining any sexual thoughts, just being in the moment and enjoying myself. Lots of juicy details later, we end up having sex in my truck for about an hour. She gets off multiple times -- something that never happened when we were dating. Now, I'm no expert at this and am going to continue to try out various methods, but not thinking about sex or worrying about my performance was huge. Maybe when we fill our thoughts with sex all day it's the equivalent of teasing ourselves, quite literally, all day? There's no way you're going to last if you're doing that.
Yeah, I guess it's all in the mind because unloading the gun is a bit hit and miss. Thanks a lot for your answer.