Slipped with edging (ME, not MO) Amazing how once I start I get utterly LOST in it. Bad idea for breaking out of flatline. Day 19 without MO
I struggled a lot today and still , felt pain, sadness, stress and horror, I let those feelings go through, I didn't numb them or avoid them
No real urge for sex or MO (Day 19 w/o MO). Weird early onset flatline? Hope to be intimate with my partner tonight - that's why I'm off MO.
You'll never know why. It's difficult. I often thought I'm doing fine and then I reset. The addiction isn't based on logic. The most important is to forgive yourself and start again. The more blame, the more stress you exert on yourself. This addiction needs negative emotions.
Day 4: Today woke up highly motivated as I managed to win a big battle against myself :) exercised and cleaned my house