Hey there, i'm a 23 years old dude from Paris, and i have PIED, for thoses who don't know me. Recently i got myself a girlfriend, and i somehow managed to have sex, and i/she liked it, anyway i have a very serious question that is bothering the sh** out of me. Should i continue to have sex with her ? ( i'm only 7 days in the process ) or is this gonna slow my reboot ? I have no idea, and i just wanna get cured asap. I've read that Ogasms slow down the reboot, is it the same with a girl? Should i try to have sex without orgasms ?
I think as long as you are very careful and aware of the chaser effect (which has started to go away for me) then it actually helps. After a month it doesn't have the same effect, especially compared to the ill effects of PMO!!! Just stay away from P and P subs and NO Ming! What to you see how sensitive it will get but still be in control.
My husband had PIED with about 50% of our encounters ending with ED. After about 8-9 months of rebooting while still having sex we did not see much of an improvement. We decided to try 8 weeks of no orgasm for him. We still had sex but he didn't orgasm. If he had an erection or not it didn't matter. Anyway after those 8 weeks his ED was cured and he hasn't had an issue since then. I think continuing to have sex helps rewire as long as you are not fantasizing during orgasm. For someone with PIED I recommend still having sex but refrain from orgasm for you. This will really help you rewire because you are doing everything but. Some people refrain from sex altogether and that can be a successful route as well. I think it's really important to not put all the focus on your penis and whether or not it is erect. Sex doesn't have to end because you have a flaccid penis. There are lots of other things you can do to stay intimate and satisfy your partner!
You don't need a condom if you aren't going to use your penis. I mean you cannot even have intercourse at all. It's not part of the rules. Rewiring is strictly about your partners pleasure and being into her. Not focused on you, your pleasure and your penis. This is what worked for us and was recommended on an ED forum. I know it sounds tough and it was but we gained so much. You are only a week in so I'm not sure how this might affect you. My husband had rebooted at the point we did this but his rewiring was not happening because of his focus on his penis during sex. Your total attention needs to be on the person you are with to rewire fully. Just like when you wired to porn, your focus was never on your penis or what it was doing but what was happening on the screen. Hope that makes sense
Thanks Limeaid, I think it's great to have a 'wife of a former addict' shed her perspective on all matters of NoFap. This method is called 'Karezza', Gabe talked about it in his Basics of Rebooting video. I'm going to try it with my girlfriend as well.
20cents doesn 't "karezza" use penetration? For some reason I thought you did. We didn't use penetration at all. I think having a requirement of an erect penis in any sexual activity is not good for someone with PIED.
And herein lies an issue that a lot of couples have. You can still have sex without penetration. Caressing, fondling, oral etc. Sex can be anything that is done by two people that is intimate in nature. We read the book "great sex" on advice from someone on an ED forum. Great read and it was here that the 8 weeks of sex without the use of a penis was suggested to cure ED. It worked for us so that's the only thing I have to go on!
I guess I just thought most people would use the word 'sex' to describe sexual intercourse, i.e. penetration.
Thanks for the informations, i had sex multiples times with my girlfriend, ED wasn't that much of an issue, i mean if i really didn't think about my boner i'd have a boner a lot of times with her ... Anyway i orgasmed, i'll try to have sex without orgasm, i don't think she'll like no penetration for 8 weeks, even tho i could do it. My condition is getting better, atleast thats what i'm seeing !
Awesome! Yeah thinking about your penis can give you issues. That was the point of the 8 weeks for us. I think at that point for us my husband was likely suffering from performance anxiety but we can't say for sure. Either way it sounds like you may not need the 8 weeks. If the ED comes back you can use it as a back up plan. Keep rewiring and staying off porn
@Limeaid thanks for the technique, i'll think of it if need be. I don't know how but i relapsed. It sucks that even with a girlfriend i still can't resist to porn... I have to find a way, i was making progress.
