reached 28 days hardmode this was my first goal. the next goal is 60 days pmofree. never thought this would be so hard. but i am getting clear in my head now. i can see the addiction and what it did to me. how poisoned my brain is. what a big damage porn made over years in my behaviour towards women. i was living in my little fantasy-world with all the pornstars. they became a part of my life. they lived in my imagination. i was a spectator for years. i watched hundreds of movies with people having hard sex in front of cameras. my part was sitting in front of a screen and fapping like a douche. now with a little bit distance i can see clearly how porn destroyed my soul. i accept that it is a very long way to recovery - i am at the beginning. this forum helped me to understand this addiction - there is a disease like this and i am not the only one fighting against it. reading many posts here helped me really a lot. thx nofap. following things changed: - no anxiety of foreign people and new circumstances - no fear of future - more positive thoughts - more performance (sports) - accept my life how it is at the moment following withdrawals experienced so far: - mental breakdown (cried two times like a little child) - very strong urges in the second week - my brain tried to outsmart me watching porn (several times) - very strong headache (migraine) - some sleepless nights now i feel like a monk who started a long journey. i hope i will reach the next goal.
Congrats monkotto. How weird is that I was at the same day as you yesterday. It's an awesome feeling when you look back, and say, I fought all those urges! Congrats and see you in 30 days to share the success!
thx APCIA. today is my last day in hardmode. tomorrow i start 60 days pmo free. stay strong! thx yousafe. the main advice i can give you is read lots of stuff in this forum. see how other guys are struggling and fighting.
Well done bro, it has been surely the result of your hard work and dedication. Very pleased for you. Wishing you all the best as you're pushing towards 60 days. Good luck
thx tombuktu. right dedication and struggle. 6 days for you to go. stay strong! what is your next goal?
Thanks, When I reach 30 days, I intend to move the goal to 45, then 60, then 90 and 120. After 120 I will decide whether I still need thecounter or not. But that is still a long way to go. Will cross that bridge when we get there. Right now I am just focused on 30 and try to live one day at a time.
My compliments monkotto for your success... I've been free from pmo for almost 21 days (i failed for 6 hours). In the last 4 days i felt very strong urges, especially during the night, and the last night i relapsed at 3 am just to sleep some time. I've seen that you too have had sleepless nights.. How do you fight urges during the night? What activities/solutions have you found to become calmer?
hi italianbuddy, in the night when i cant sleep i meditate to meditation-music. you can find tons of on youtube or i hear english conversation videos - make yourself a tea and sit in front of a window. in the second week i had really strong urges. two times i nearly relapsed. there is only one way: you have to stay hard! you have to tell yourself every time when there is a urge to watch porn that you are abstinent and that you are strong! since three days the urge is getting weaker. there is still a long way to go - this is fighting against a bad habit which was a part of us for a very very long period in life. this is a challenge. good luck.
thank you monkotto, i appreciate... I'll consider your tips, and by the way we are more or less on the same path! One of the problem of the last streak was that i edged, and that was a BIG mistake.. i discourage anyone to edge. It doesn't help, it makes problems bigger.
thx krazykhan - extend to 90 days. i started with hardmode (the first 28 days of the current 33 days) changed then in pmofree. i also stopped visiting prostitutes and drinking alcohol - this is a comprehensive reboot. running 4 times in the week - total 24 kilometer every week. after this reboot i am 18 years again! (i am 36 years now) after this reboot i am going to party like an animal!!! 20 hours porn 20 prostitutes 20 bottles vodka in two days!!! no of course not just kidding.
hey! promised I'd be here with my 60 days... Hope you made it to 60! Congrats to you sir! Wops! Spoke too soon... Saw now my signature... Looks like tomorrow will be 60 days...
hi stewie, yes the fight against the porn-monster goes on. ok day 60 reward is - a big peace yummy cake. see you again at day 90. stay strong. edit: piece of cake and not peace of cake of course!
Monkotto, what an achievement! Congratulations on your success and thanks for sharing. As you stated, reading the posts of other people fighting as hard as you are, is extremely encouraging. Continue to press forward man. I'll be pressing forward with you and the rest of you guys!
