so yesterday i relapsed after only 6 days of hard mode. then i relapsed again in the same day. then, i relapsed again this evening. i realized that i was too crazy and that was when i decided not to give in again, cause i knew if i do, the chaser effect will become worse and it will be harder to get out of the chaser. but thennnnnn, a few minutes after i relapsed, my dad wanted to watch this racing and action kind of movie at the cinema, and i had to go with him no matter what. i tried to resist, cuz i know that those kind of movies usually have alot of sexy scenes. but yea i knew that he will be mad at me if i dont accompany him. so with my fear and worries, i eventually watched the movie. and my guess was right, it has sex scenes and bikinis scenes. typical racing movies. i looked away so many times, but still heard the orgasm sounds, and i still saw glimpses of triggers for a few seconds. and yeah i went home, and as i expected, i relapsed again. damn, quadraple relapsed in only two days. i realized how messed i am now. im so fked up. fyi, i relapsed so many times in a similar case like this, forced to watch something, then went home and looked for nude scenes of the actresses that were in the movie. i think i cant really do anything in this case, what do u guys think? should i tell my dad that im on nofap so i cant watch those kind of things, or should i just do whatever i gotta do, and fight the urges and pain from inside, but it will be easier for me to relapse. i need help, fyi im 14 years old, have been fighting this addiction for 2 years and highest streak was about 3 weeks. this year my highest streak was only 8 days. it is getting worse. *sorry for my bad grammar*
What you experienced is very common. Think about a recovering alcoholic. He goes a month or two without a drink and then slips. Once he slips he becomes depressed about his weakness and thinks, "What the fuck....I might as well just give up." Then the trouble really begins The same is true with what you are going through. Once you slipped, you just gave up. So just start all over again and when the temptation arises, come to this site and get some support. There's no sin is relapsing; the sin is in just giving up. So stay strong!
This addiction is like a magnet. The closer you get to PMO, the harder it is to get away from. If you can get a good streak going, and you can start enjoying the simple pleasures of life, it does get easier (or so I'm told ... I have a hard time getting longer than 28 days myself). Very rarely do I just have a single relapse. Usually if I relapse, I'll relapse 4x in a single day. I totally get it. But be encouraged--you're 14 years old and you're already working on attacking this problem. I'm 40!! Keep at it, and you will be so far ahead of the game by the time you're my age. Keep coming back and sharing how you're doing!
