Home alone

I logged out.

 

The first porn video that I watched was a youtube video. back then there was many porn videos on youtube. it was a fetish video. I didn't watched vanilla porn maybe until I am 17-18. first years, I only looked for fetish content. even when I was a child, I was having fetish fantasies way before than internet porn. way before than my first orgasm. There was a time that I watched vanilla porn. couple of years. but I don't watch them much anymore. now I almost always watch fetish porn. the problem for me is to treat my injury. I don't feel less mentally because I watch fetish videos. I feel less because I am damaging and traumatizing my penis. this is really hard.

 

interesting. ı don't have masturbation urges without having porn urges. it is good that u can want masturbation without porn.
and yeah save yourself to your wife. is your goal 90 days?

 

yeah that's a good sign.
my goal is to heal from my penile injury. I don't know when it would happen but I feel like I should do at least 1 month of nofap. maybe 3 months. hopefully not 6 months if I fail before 1 month, I would be unsatisfied, but 3-4 months would be great.

but I try to trick myself into "just 3 days" and then 7 days mark and then 14 days mark so on....