Oh my God, I am in total chill mode right now I cleaned up, prayed and did project tasks which took quite some time and involved phone use. Then, I ended up scrolling quite a bit on IG and Pinterest which I think has led me to feeling as if I am on a holiday. Like I have got nothing to do when I have so much to do but for some reason I don’t even feel worried about it Has the procrastination monster taken over? What’s going on?!
20/4, Sat Sleep time: 12:15 AM (I don’t remember exactly tho) Wake-up time: 6:30 AM but seeing I had woken up late, I went back to bed. Finally got out of bed at 8 Nap: None 1- Did I meet my studying target? Uni Study: 0/4 Course T: 1/1 Had my class and I did attend it. And yes, I almost skipped class Course A/C: 0/1 2- Did I meet my reading target? Read 3 chapters: 24/39 3- Project Task Alhamdulillah imp tasks done Not much to say. Well, I don’t want to say much. Just feel disappointed in myself. Couldn’t even hold a streak for a week. Bye.
21/4, Sun Sleep time: 1:00 AM (I don’t remember exactly tho) Wake-up time: 5:15 AM Nap: 4:30 - 6:00 PM my body felt tired 1- Did I meet my studying target? Uni Study: 1/4 Course T: 0/1 Course A/C: 0/1 2- Did I meet my reading target? Read 3 chapters: 24/39 3- Project Task Alhamdulillah imp tasks done Another disappointing day. I only felt better after Maghrib and in that time, studied a bit and even enjoyed it. I managed to not cry the whole day and had a nice dinner out with fam and even had ice cream! Right now, it got so late that I couldn’t complete my Quran goal today. And I feel like crying for not meeting any targets. I also feel like disappearing and isolating. These feelings are never nice to deal with.
Oh ya rabb. So… I was just covering my course A lesson and did the math and still had 13 lessons to go and I got so confused because I only skipped like 2-3 days… how come I have 13 lessons left with 2 remaining days until the deadline?? Because.. I had been doing 1 lesson per day, not 2 LOL I am not worried, just amused. Thank God this is a self paced course and not an actual deadline, alhamdulillah At least, it got me to talk on here, otherwise, I haven’t felt like talking at all We will see how we can restrategise
Deadlines Review/Reminder Reading: 24th April. Course A: 25th April. Now, almost 3-4 lessons/day. Don’t want to extend the deadline, want to get done with it so I will try to do more lessons per day Uni Study: Highest priority. Deadline is 2nd May. I am clearly not treating it as highest priority. Need to fix that. Course T: Daily homework. Complete remaining assignments + quiz prep. Deadline is 26th April Course C: 8 lessons left. Deadline given by institute is mid May but I have exams in that week so I need to finish this in April. So, 30th April.
Evaluation (13th April - 21st April) Uni Study: 3/3+3.5/4+4/4+2/4+3.5/4+0/4+1/4+0/4+1/4 Course T: 0/1+1/1+1/1+1/1+1/1+1/1+0.5/1+0/1+0/1 Reading: 3/3+0/3+6/3+0/3+3/3+3/3+3/3+0/3+0/3 Have done a not so bad job in meeting Course T and reading targets. Uni study has been quite inconsistent. Have failed to meet my targets and am quite behind now. Course A/C not mentioned because as I said, since they are short courses with only a few lessons left, the goal is to complete them in time. But with the rest of the things, I am also trying to be more consistent, balanced and avoid procrastination. Sleep time - Wakeup time 10:30 PM - 5:00 AM 11:00 PM - 5:15 AM 10:45 PM - 7:00 AM 11:20 PM - 5:00 AM 1:00 AM - 5:15 AM 1:15 AM - 5:15 AM 12:15 AM - 8:00 AM 12:15 AM - 6:30 AM 1:00 AM - 8:00 AM Just trying to see consistency in my bedtime and wake up time. Not sure how helpful this form of tracking is. Need to work on a nice excel tracker but I kind of left it in the middle and am only tracking things here. Let's see.
22/4, Mon Sleep time: 1:40 AM Wake-up time: 8:00 AM I woke up at 6:30 but went back to sleep. Nap: 5:15 - 6:45 PM honestly, just fell asleep on the sofa 1- Did I meet my studying target? Uni Study: 3/4 Course T: 1/1 Course A/C: 2/1 2- Did I meet my reading target? Read 3 chapters: 29/39 Read 5 chapters 3- Project Task None Alhamdulillah a better day
23/4, Tue Sleep time: 2:00 AM Wake-up time: 6:30 AM Nap: None 1- Did I meet my studying target? Uni Study: 1.5/4 Course T: 1/1 Course A/C: 1/1 2- Did I meet my reading target? Read 3 chapters: 29/39 Read 5 chapters 3- Project Task Done on time Really behind in uni study. Going to focus on only that tomorrow. I really really want to wake up super early and have to go to bed rn so I cant do more. Plus I am tired. Mixture of PMS and a long day. Went out today with my best friend which was much needed and had a good time but too tired now.
Really worried about uni study I woke up late and I feel so sleepy and can’t seem to focus I also feel cold and tired and want to lay down Not sure what’s up with that Thinking of cancelling my online class Just can’t focus and then it will be even more difficult to get back to studying after attending my class Will break the little momentum that has built up
Today I only have to focus on 3 things 1- Tilawah 2- Uni study - I MUST complete 6 modules 3- Reading the book which is alhamdulillah quite easy. 10 chapters seem like a lot but its not I will skip on course A and T today
I am really struggling a lot with focus etc PLUS dilemmas that I shouldn’t be thinking about during this critical time
I feel like I have accepted defeat. As much as I would like to have a balanced approach when it comes to uni study, I feel like it's too late and so, no matter what I do now, I won't be able to cover up my course in time unless, I go the imbalanced way. That is, pull all nighters, go on a madness dash. But even madness dashes happen in the last moments, just a few days before deadline. So, the worry has kicked in but not on a high enough level. First, let's address failure. Failure is learning. Failure is not game over, failure is try again. So, this is not over, procrastination monster. You may have had me in your clutch for a few days, but I will continue to fight against you. Second, as heroic as that sounds, I am still not sure if I can even manage to pull an all nighter. Just don't feel that kind of sense of urgency. But, I can try and I should try. It's better to do it in April than in May right before exams. EDIT: On a positive note, I achieved my reading goal Completed the book today. Alhamdulillah
I covered 1 module this morning + notes and some reading I covered 2 modules after my last post here I am not done yet but taking a half hour break inshallah. I have not covered all readings or quizzes so I will have to review whatever I am covering rn in the morning inshallah. I can't do the quizzes right now because I should do them with a fresh mind, otherwise I will make blunders EDIT: Done with another module. Another 20 min break as I complete my tilawah inshallah. Will see if I can do one more module before Fajr or not.
24/4, Wed Sleep time: 10:50 PM Wake-up time: 7:40 AM (I woke up at 3, which was my target but snoozed. Then at 5, but said oh wait 2 more minutes. And then at 6:30, and felt angry at myself for snoozing so did not get out of the bed) Nap: None 1- Did I meet my studying target? Uni Study: 4/4 (But I am lagging so need to catch up) Course T: Not for today Course A/C: Not for today 2- Did I meet my reading target? Read 3 chapters: 39/39 DONE ALHAMDULILLAH! Off the list 3- Project Task Done on time
Today’s goals: 1- Tilawah (get back on one juz) 2- Uni study (4 modules but… technically should be doing more :/ but I know today I cannot do more) 3- Course A (3 lessons at least) Not sure how productive will I be today… Feel sleepy + am fasting + went to the dentist and they had to do a procedure so that took time
I have a few project tasks to complete and then I will get to studying inshallah One of my friends hasn’t been active on here so it has me feeling concerned and I keep checking the site because of it Hope they are okay inshallah
25/4, Thurs Sleep time: 5:00 AM Wake-up time: 10:00 AM (all nighter, remember?) Nap: None 1- Did I meet my studying target? Uni Study: 0/4 Course T: Not for today Course A/C: I did say I would do it but it didn’t seem possible 2- Did I meet my reading target? None 3- Project Task Done on time. Had more to do. Thursdays are busy because of this. Today, I went back to sleep after waking up. Not wise. But since I was feeling low last night, it made it difficult to face the day. 3 important goals 1- Tilawah 2- Course T 3- Uni study
Not much to report... well, doesn't mean not much is happening. A lot is, especially in my heart and mind. Anyway. I did 3 modules and have now completed 2/5 subjects in my uni course. I am not too happy with my quiz scores in the second subject. They are very average. But I don't think it's right to expect too much from myself given how much I am covering in such a short time and how I have not been feeling the best lately. I did learn some new things though and I am grateful for that, alhamdulillah. I did not mean to pull an all nighter but looks like it's happening as I still have to complete course T.
26/4, Fri Sleep time: 2:00 AM (It was definitely after 1 AM, don't remember exactly tho) Wake-up time: 10:00 AM (This is when I got out of bed to start my day. I did wake up in between) Nap: None 1- Did I meet my studying target? Uni Study: 3/4 Course T: I completed my assignments. I kind of forgot to do some other homework Course A/C: None. But I better get started on it. 2- Did I meet my reading target? None 3- Project Task None
Have you tried to study just after Sun-Rise, Ma'am FallingPetals? I used to study that way when I was preparing for MCAT. I used to read three or two chapters in a day, thoroughly. But you'll have to sleep before 11 PM for that. NowAdays Im again struggling to copy that routine again. The major benefit of that is you don't feel less energetic as you wake Up, you can do exercise or M Walk (to alert our mind), you take a meal just on time and having our night time sleep fulfilled makes it easier to take a short nap as needed afterwards. This way I scored 154 / 210 with two months prep after a gap year without study. There were 54+ (Intermediate's) chapters apart from English and Logical Reasoning. I know its not that good but as far as I prepared, it was good. 1 hour in the morning = 1.5 hours at night plus, Extra hours, Mental health and a Readiness to move further. But, not all the days are alike, sometimes studying at night makes sense but at the cost of your next day's terms that I described earlier. Stay ambitious! Stay purposeful! And Pray!
