Its been about 8 months since i watched porn…in fact my porn use has reduced alot over the last 4 years or so. Whenever i have watched it has been a one off relapse now and then. My problem has been more sexting online, sharing images, chatrooms, kink/dating sites etc. i have also reduced this significantly over the last few months. Now these have been removed from my life for the most part the issue i have now is fantasizing. What i have found though is that it is one specific fantasy that usually pops up and forces a relapse. I noticed it a long time ago and since then every relapse has been this one fantasy. Its not like i see a hot girl or see something on the tele then get the urge to fap. Its one scenario i tend to fantasize about regularly and find it difficult to stop the thoughts. i know this fantasy stems from when i used to watch porn but i thought having gone a significant amount of time without porn and other outlets that the thoughts would ease over time. The fantasy is one i really want removed from my brain as it is one that involves my partner with other men which i know is not healthy. I know there must be others on here who have struggled with one fetish/fantasy…for me its the only fantasy that pops up and the only one that causes relapse. Has anyone on here had experience on recovering from a particular porn induced fantasy or have any advice on how to reboot from this? Porn and other things like sexting chatrooms you can removed just by blocking sites and removing devices but thoughts stay with you 24/7. How does one remove fantasies? Especially one that keeps coming up and have relapsed to so many times? They can be so overwhelming at times.
Therapy. Also, reading books. Most fantasies are rooted in ignorance of what a woman experiences (often harmful) and the "side effects" of the situation. I think we've all been there and struggled with recurring fantasies. A lot of that is your P brain trying to trick you back into the addiction. The first step is admitting you have a problem, but I see a lot of denial in your post here. >>My problem has been more sexting online, sharing images, chatrooms, kink/dating sites etc. i have also reduced this significantly over the last few months.>> This is sex-addict behavior, pure and simple. I've been there too. There are users on here that "only" hire prostitutes. It doesnt have to just be videos. Sharing images is especially bad, as that is usually without the persons consent and violates people (watch videos on survivors in the industry, it destroys them) and even laws in some countries. I'd recommend starting with admitting you have a sex / arousal addiction problem and go from there. The "I only have one fantasy, everything else is under control" narrative here is not convincing in the least. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news. It gets better once you get on the wagon.
Well, my porn addiction is all about Femdom. First thing first: Stop watching It. After, learn more about Men-Women relations.
Similar thing for me. I'm mainly addicted to one video. It's a fetish video and everything about it is amazing. From the countless thousands of porn that I've seen, it's never been beaten. It's a niche fetish, but it's more common now. Of course I've relapsed to other videos, but this one I'm addicted to....I always go back to it, always. The video is 20 years old. When I first watched it, it was in standard definition. Then roughly in 2008 they released the HD version, but not in 1080p or anything. I've been hooked ever since. I've tried to get it remastered myself. If it was in 4k....fuck I can't imagine how excited I'd be - I'd probably look like a heroin addict at the end of it. It's one video, but I fantasise scenes in which girls do that same scene to me. I'm lucky enough that my wife pleasures me with this fetish....but I always compare it to that one video. The scene is only about 2mins, but I've developed PE because of it. I've tried to abstain from the fetish completely, but I've just accepted that I'll always like it. Perhaps in time when I never watch porn again I won't be so obsessed with it.
I think this could be the main problem for you. If you stop watching or thinking at that video, you can probably overcome the problem (with enough time of sobriety)... but if your wife pleasures you with the same fetsh, you'll always mentally recall that video, in a way that's impossible to forget.
You have a valid point and I totally agree. I have tried and failed to do that before, but that doesn't mean I'll fail this time. I enjoy it, but it's never as amazing as I think it'll be. It's a never ending loop and it has to stop
