Hey all, I'mDrinkingTea, in fact I just finished a nice mug of hot chocolate but lets not quibble about details. So I fapped about thirty minutes ago and used that moment of clarity post-PMO to get my butt back in line. I found this website (thank you for existing as an alternative to the Reddit page) and signed up, then installed K9 and put the password in a bothersome place to reach. Already the K9 has proved helpful; it's nice knowing sexy images are more than a click away now. I promptly wiped my computer of sexual images and fiction. And now I'm writing this. The reason for me to do NoFap is because it is getting in the way of my self-improvement. On my first try I managed 68 days with minimal effort. Since then, and it has been over two years since, I have struggled to get beyond two weeks. The reason for this is because eventually I succumb to the temptation because the internet is such a ready source of images it's scary. But with K9 here to help me I'm hopeful this attempt will be better. I'll also try to keep a journal going, though even when I haven't been on NoFap I find it difficult to keep a steady journal, the on-going pedestal to say how I feel each day isn't very appealing to me. So we'll see. I think it's important to mention another reason I've had trouble with NoFap is due to my sexuality. I have what is known as Autogynephilia (though some people on the internet don't like this term) which means, get this, that I find it sexually arousing to think of myself as a woman. Yep, you heard me right, this actually exists and I'm stuck with it. I didn't choose this part of myself, and I'm sure its attached to other psycological issues I may have. I wanted to take a leap and share this with the community in case there are others out there with the same issue, from my experience with it, Autogynephilia is a larger issue than people realize, mainly because people are too embarrassed/afraid to talk about it. It's important to mention it because fapping puts these urges to one side as a cathartic release. However when on NoFap this urges become a lot stronger, and take on an emotional importance which can be really scary. Maybe I'll keep my journal updated to share this with those interested (in the name of Science!). Anyway, this is me, oh, I'm also looking for an accountability partner who has started within one week of me. There's probably another thread for that but I thought I might as well mention it. Thanks all.
Hi, thanks for leading the way on this topic. Autogynephilia, a term I didn't know existed until two weeks ago, comes closest to describing my sexual orientation since early childhood. Opening up and accepting this about myself has caused my PMO to explode, practically rocketing off the scale. Time to call a halt to this before I PMO myself into a heart attack or go nuts or something. I hope that you're still around, I'mDrinkingTea. Would love some support from a kindred spirit as I try to come to terms with this newly realized energy which could be incredibly liberating if it could be channeled constructively rather than blown away in PMO fantasy. I'm about 1 hour into day 1 of what I pray will be a new life of acceptance and creative exploration, free from denial, fear, hiding, shame and self abuse. Hope to hear from you.
