NoFap

Age 41 – After 30 days of quitting porn

Gentlemen and ladies,

I’m obligated to give a 30-day report, for reasons I will explain. Also, I know it will help me feel awesome.

With regard to superpowers, I’m not running my own company (yet) or making fashion models drop their shopping bags in awe, but I am having consistent small successes and victories in my life which, taken together, do add up to the miraculous, especially relative to how I was living and felt 31 days ago.

Most days, I don’t feel my life has changed that much (other than no PMO). But I have a sense that a seed is planted and swelling to life, that a tide has turned, and that massive, massive change is afoot. I glimpse it in small (yet huge) ways almost every day.

I think the foundation for all of this higher self-esteem. Not arrogance, or even confidence much of the time, but a stronger sense at my core that I am valuable and that I can handle life. You feel it too, because you’ve made the same decision I have.

The result of this feeling is small-but-better decisions throughout the day, which are rapidly adding up to a better experience of life.

I “find myself” doing the following:

  • Getting up in the morning
  • Exercising every day
  • Looking women in the eye and speaking more confidently with them
  • Opening small conversations with strangers
  • Turning off video games in favor of something more productive
  • Closing internet tabs that are a time sink (YouTube, news sites, etc.)
  • Choosing to make that phone call to a friend, or answer the call that’s coming in
  • Choosing to go to that hobbyist meeting I’d been considering
  • Choosing to come clean with my therapist that I have a porn problem
  • Taking small steps on a half-dozen projects that I’ve intended to start for a long time but never have
  • Standing up straighter, holding my chest out a little more
  • Generally choosing, moment-to-moment, to move toward healthy/positive things and away from unhealthy/negative ones

Before, I would stay in bed all morning, or read internet bullshit for hours (often leading to PMO). Now my brain says, “You’re better than this,” and I get up, get out, and take positive action.

Then, immediately, my brain witnesses this change, and thinks, “Whoa, that’s new, that’s good” and my self-esteem gets another little uptick. Ultimately, I seem to be in a POSITIVE FEEDBACK LOOP, rather than the negative one that PMO created and gradually wore me down, down, down for, well, decades.

To be clear, this does not happen all day every day! Last night I wasted lots of time playing Plants v. Zombies! And I felt shitty about it. But I also did a shitload of productive things yesterday. And it’s the latter that resonates in my consciousness, which is what got me up this morning and writing this post to help you guys/gals (and to help myself!).

I have had a few external things that are inexplicable, but real:

  • I have had men at events/gatherings introduce themselves to me
  • I have had attractive women start conversations with me, and even blush at their own awkwardness (bizarre!)

Sexually, I’m basically dead. I’ve been more or less flatline since Day One, with only a hand full of half-mast erections. (Not literally a hand full, fuckers. I meant “a few”.) Actually this morning I had some wood coming and going that was stronger than I’ve felt yet. Mentally, I’ve very attracted to hot women, and check them out (not creepy tho), but I have zero physical response and no sense that I could perform if I got the opportunity.

But I don’t care! I mean I do, but I’m being patient. I’m actually grateful for the serenity and quiet, when so many of you are struggling every day to fight urges. My willpower has historically sucked, so I’m not sure I could stop myself.

So….so far, so good. I’m enjoying the slow awakening of my positive self, and hopefully, a new sexual self eventually. I feel hope for the first time in a long time. I’m sensing the early tremors of a massive life shift, and I hope it’s real.

Now, let me close with this:

The MOST IMPORTANT thing you can do for your recovery is to GIVE to others in recovery, and I’ve found no place better than here. YOUR opinion and experiences are valuable to others here, no matter how freaky or “unique.” In fact, the more oddball your experience, the more likely you will help that other oddball that is just like you and feels totally alone. YOUR support matters to someone else here, no matter how small or weird you feel on any given day.

If you take nothing else from this post, take this: Comment regularly on NoFap, especially a little deeper on the New pages on posts with zero comments. Also, post your own experience regularly on NoFap, both your victories and your struggles, ESPECIALLY as you get into longer streaks. There is a high percentage of Week 1 people here, and they need the insight, support, and inspiration of longer-streak folks.

Go support someone in the New section right now. I mean it!

Stay frosty, Faptains.

NoFap results originally posted by NoFap user iampowerlessover (source)

Comments

  1. tiger556 says:

    Thanks for sharing

  2. lou says:

    thanks for sharing i will post my experience after too 🙂

  3. Allan says:

    Good job. i’d been trying nofap for some time, but i have always relapsed. Now i have the confidence to do what i must do, because now a have a goal, one of improvement of one self.

  4. meneucci says:

    Hi,
    good luck with your reboot!
    I’m 35 years old, Italian guy. I’m starting today with the process of rebooting. I think I am going to struggle with this process since I started masturbation when I was 11 years old, with no internet at that time but television and VHS. I lost my virginity at 16 years old but I never ejaculated during the intercourse I always have to masturbate to come.
    I suffer from delayed ejaculation I can have sex for one hour for example without coming. When the girl is satisfied I started to masturbate but during the masturbation, I am thinking to porn scenes from porn actress so I have associated ejeculation to porn scene and from october 2018 I haven’t more orgasms so I can ejeculated without orgasms.
    These are the main problems I want to quit porn and enjoy more intercourse and I hope I can have again orgasms and ejeculate inside the vagina.
    Any suggestions?

  5. Kaizen says:

    Thx for charing your expérience with us

  6. Jason111 says:

    Thank you for sharing your experience…i will update my progress soon.

  7. no name says:

    i am from china,now am 16years old.i dont want have a fuck life i must change.most of my friend them like this …… you know.but i cant like them,i must do some thing to help me,what’s more help my life.i think you like me.what are you waiting for?let’s move.fight the devil in you mind.

  8. David says:

    I am 62days into the challenge. I have relapse 4times since I started 2times without porn and 2times with porn I am heart broken I don’t know what to do now.

  9. Ali bovi says:

    I start my 0 day right now pray for me that i can continue for 30 days i hope. Once i get to day30 i can go on…..

  10. Juice wrld says:

    Grateful for sharing your experience with us. I’m a beginner on this forum and I’m hoping this forum can instill in me, the redemption I’ve been hoping for a long time. I’m on day 2 into the challenge of 30 days. Hoping to keep this going.

  11. Sam says:

    Hello guys, I’ve just started my challenge two days ago, exactly 24/3.

    I got the idea through one of my friends who told me about this community, you are really making difference and inspiring people all over the world.

    I decided to stop porn and masturbation for 3 months and let’s see how it will go.

    Thanks.

  12. Alex says:

    Thanks for sharing.
    I’m 39 now, am in a relationship and for some time my partner accepted my behavior, all but sex was always good and I tried to fill my lack in the bed with other things. But now he no longer is fulfilled.
    I’m no PMO for the 6th day now. It is easier (for now) than I thought, trying to keep myself busy reading novels, and all the positive comments in here. The lack of libido is scaring, but the morning woods the last two mornings keep me positive (didn’t have one for months!). I hope that going back to have private intimacy with my partner will be possible, even though he doesn’t believe that much in it anymore. I already tried to abstain from pron some time ago for a week: the sex we had after those 7 days was amazing! And after that I just fell back into the old habit, thinking that I could stop whenever I wanted. But I couldn’t.
    Now it’s my time to heal. Wish me luck.

  13. Alex says:

    Thanks man. You are a funny guy with great will power, you make my night so happy. Cause from this day I want experience better life withouth urge to masturbate. I will post my struggle in the progress in this forum continuesly

  14. Rafiqui says:

    Gracias por compartir…Vamos que sí se puede…

  15. Aman says:

    Good job.
    I started right now

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