Working for full Reboot after 10 years of PMO

Hi all,

As many of the people posting here, I started PMOing at my early teenage years, when I was around 12 years old. Since the time I can trace back my memory I have had social anxiety, and PMO has just made it worse. I started relying hevily on porn for fapping since I was 16 years old, when I accquired a laptop for myself.

Porn and masturbation have been distorting the way I percieve other people, women and men alike (I am bisexual) for years, considering them mere objects with which I could have sexual intercourse, in my fantasies of course. There was a huuuge gap between what I believed in (the dignity of all human beings regardless of how sexy they might look, the importance of respect between people, the need for love and afection in all relationship...) and the content of the videos I used to fap. All this has proven a heavy burden in my relationships, especially with other women, with whom I have much trouble talking to. But it has even reached the point of affecting my relationships with my own family.

I had never considered myself an addict, since I never directly stopped doing things (passing my exams, going out with friends etc) for PMO. However, deep in my heart, I knew that this practice was very harmful and was doing me no good at all, so I starting surfing the internet for information on this matter and I happen to find this NoFap forums and other videos related to porn science and porn effects. This discovery caused an important impact on me and how I regarded porn, which until that time I had resisted to consider something bad.

I didn't have the willpower to start a reboot until last august, when I decided to quit porn but continue fapping. I reached a streak of 70 days or so, but due to great academic pressure I relapsed in october and continue like that until mid november. Then, I decided to start a new reboot but fell again just a week ago. These months have been very hard for me due to my familiar situation and my uni, so it was quite a struggle for me to commit to a succesful reboot.

When I relapsed last week I decided that that was enough, and I was going to go on hardmode for the next 90 days. I've reached a week today, and that's the longest time without fapping I've been through for many many years. However this reboot will develop (and I'm hopeful that it'll go great) this will be my lowest porn consumption year since I was 16, and I think that is a great success to start with, but not enough, that's for sure.

I'd like to thank NoFap, all fapstronauts and all the people devoted to spread the harms that come along porn consumption for their work, because without them, I would have been an addict for all the days to come.

Life is so short that it would be a crime to spend it in front of a computer feeding a wicked industry while destroying our own soul.

Good luck to all rebooters, the satisfaction with oneself and peace of mind consecuence of escaping this addiction is worth the struggle of the Reboot.

Thanks

P.S.: Meditation helps a lot. Give it a try!