Will I lose the love for my boyfriend?

There are many cases here of what we like to call "HOCD" (homosexual obsessive-compulsive disorder), where the perception of one's own sexual orientation is warped, and we usually assume it is due to porn consumption. HOCD is always accompanied by feelings of anxiety, imposing a lot of emotional stress on the individual, and it is always about sex, not about love.

If you feel love for your boyfriend I would assume that you actually are gay, and this is not caused by porn. This would mean that quitting porn would not make your love cease. Based on just this, I would say: Go for it! It can only make your relationship better.

Nevertheless what irritates me a bit is that you say you've talked for a couple of months. Have you ever met each other? To be honest, I am quite skeptical about falling in love online, without a real life date, hence the question...

 

Hi ChikenWinngs,

For whatever reason, right now you are attracted to men. Don't overthink why this is, just accept it. Many people adjust their sexual orientation multiple times. It's not important why you are attracted to men right now. Who knows whether you started watching gay porn because, as you say, you"lost your desire for women" or because you had bisexual/homosexual tendencies to begin with.

What is important is that you have an addiction to masturbation and porn. Whether you maintain or lose your love for this guy is secondary and will sort itself out naturally. Don't worry about what will happen after your brain re-wires itself. Whatever happens will be what is best for you, regardless of whether you're still attracted to men or not.

Stay focused on healing and re-wiring your brain. Best of luck.

 

Excellently put. I only wish to add, withdrawal from this PMO addiction comes with very wild and unstable emotions. I thought I fell in love so many times, just from a smile from a girl I saw for the first time. I am not trying to shoot your feelings down, but I'd advise caution, even more so when you meet someone online. And let me ask you one thing, would you rather keep your feelings and stay an addict, watching your life slowly unraveling till you become an empty husk, or risk the feelings for the surety that you can be free, whole and healthy, potentially even keeping those feelings and knowing at that point that they are genuine?