Why the significant male to female ratio?

Discussion in 'NoFap Technical Support' started by James23, Apr 29, 2016.

  1. James23

    James23 Fapstronaut

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    I know that there are many differences between men and women, but why are there so few women here on the site compared to women? I have a hard time believing so few women have issues with pmo whether it be struggles they have personally or the fallout they are dealing with from a loved one with pmo issues.

    PS autocorrect sucks
     
    Last edited: Apr 29, 2016
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  2. ..Anna..

    ..Anna.. Fapstronaut

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    Because big part of girls and women are better leaving relationship rather than trying to ''open eyes'' to their partners, fighting etc. As there is this hope, that next partner would appreatiate more and that not everyone is struggling with it. And about having this problem by themselves... Girls just usually use other ways to how to cope with stress, this is how it is :)
     
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  3. James23

    James23 Fapstronaut

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    Ah, thank you for explaining :) It looks like I was projecting onto women the same struggles and coping mechanisms that men have.
     
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  4. Cheburashka

    Cheburashka Fapstronaut

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    Want to see where the struggling ladies are? Go to an over-eaters site. They have the same dysfunctional battles that we do. They just medicate differently.
     
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  5. melancholy king

    melancholy king Fapstronaut

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    There are two main reasons for this I believe: 1) Women are typically more romance oriented. You show a guy the right porn scene and he can finish in under a minute, most women can't get off anywhere near that fast or as easily. 2) Women usually have more experience with relationships than men do, now I know there are exceptions to this rule (extremely unattractive females mainly, which I would say are maybe 5% of all females, just from experience) however women almost always get guys fairly easily, even at a young age, meaning that because they form romantic bonds so early on their desires for porn are reduced somewhat compared to the tons of men that never even come close to women until in their 20's.
     
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  6. ..Anna..

    ..Anna.. Fapstronaut

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    Over-eaters are almost equal among both genders. From what I have seen. Only type of problematic food may differ.
     
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  7. Ikindaknew

    Ikindaknew Fapstronaut

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    We see less pervy women! Males are in rut, men are hunters. guys are external, we have the tendency to play with it lol.
    I guess females addicted to porn is a more recent phenomenon, now the the porn offering is adapting to more female-friendly genres.
     
  8. Most mainstream porn is misogynistic. It's appeal for women is very low. Even your average vanilla vids contain name calling, spitting, slapping, choking, etc. It's not produced with women in mind, it's produced with men in mind, targeted to male tastes.

    If there was a shift in porn production to more female tastes, you'd see an increase in female use and thus problems from said use.
     
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  9. James23

    James23 Fapstronaut

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    I dunno. I tend to see far more women with sexual problems than men. By that I mean they are openly reading erotic novels, going to strip clubs, behaving lewdly, or are into certain activities they should not be. When I ask them about it they tell me that they do not have a problem, but I have a hard time believing that.

    What puzzles me is that there are far fewer women here on the forums than there should be. Not a big deal. I'm hoping that the number of women here grows. One thought is that many may be intimidated or turned off by the high number of men here and are instinctively thinking that there are only weird creepy guys here or they do not want to be labeled as having a problem and becoming a social outcast.
     
  10. ..Anna..

    ..Anna.. Fapstronaut

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    James23, what do you mean by sexual problems? Having one- night stands or what? The things you named are about real life. Every woman can have short time of wildness. It is not a problem. If they are single, ofcourse...
     
  11. James23

    James23 Fapstronaut

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    I am glossing over the details, but all of those things that I mentioned is the reason most of us are here. We no longer want to be ruled or controlled by our sexual appetites. To the woman who reads erotic novels or goes to strip clubs I have to say that what you are doing is warping your understanding of sex and relationships.

    The woman who is engaging in night stands is giving away part of her soul to someone else, at least at first, and then later it no longer means what it once did. How meaningful is sex when she gets married? How committed will she be to him then? or will she say that he is wonderful? Will they really trust each other? Will sex help the two people bond to each other in the same way that sex only inside marriage can? Will the sex in marriage be seen as love or just cheap lust?

    For me, sex, in all its forms, is much more important than just lust or fun, but is an integral part of love within marriage. It is also one of the big reasons I am here.

    Erotic novels, magazines discussing how to enhance your sex life, strip clubs, one night stands, and M is all just porn in one form or another. To say these are all no big deal is to have lost the understanding and appreciation of what real sex is all about. To reduce it all to just pleasure or as a recreational activity is missing out on what it fully could be. It is also something that I have lost and hope to regain to some degree by joining this forum.

    In my experience, these women that I was referring to earlier often get into trouble later. It is a dangerous game they play.
     
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  12. Star Lord

    Star Lord Fapstronaut

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  13. Star Lord

    Star Lord Fapstronaut

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    Good example being fifty shades of grey. I mean when it was all the rage it was on mainstream TV news etc, obviously not being read but soooo much publicity for a bdsm novel. I mean even a film was made about it. Millions of women indulging in a sexual fantasy book in public, as well as private. Or listening to the audio tape in the car, at the minimum that's a distraction while driving. Theres no denying women are equally as vulnerable as men to the affects of porn related material. What I find interesting is how sexually explicit or arousing material isn't frowned upon so much for women as it is for men.
    Eg a women can comment on a males body (abs, ass etc) like "ooo I wonder if he has the whole package *wink wink* (meaning his junk)"
    While if a man says "wow look at that ass" when he sees a attractive woman he gets labeled a creep or is charged with harassment.

    Why is this?
     
    Last edited: Apr 30, 2016
  14. James23

    James23 Fapstronaut

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    Dunno, but from experience I know it is far more explicit and hardcore.
     
  15. BobDobbs

    BobDobbs Fapstronaut

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    I think that has been happening, and also that female tastes have been changing. Use of porn by women IS on the rise.

    There is a lot more non-degrading porn out there, and a lot of women are embracing their interest in rougher sex and fantasies of promiscuity.

    Whatever problems women develop in relation to porn and/or masturbation will be different though, because of both physiology and access to sex. Women can obtain casual sex (and often relationships) much more easily than men, so they have less of an incentive to escape to porn. MRAs assume this means there is a power imbalance, but ability to obtain casual sex is so freaking unimportant in the grand scheme.
     
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  16. melancholy king

    melancholy king Fapstronaut

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    "far fewer women than there should be"? What do you mean by that statement? are you saying that, there should be more women experiencing issues with porn than there already are? are you suggesting that Nofap isn't open minded, and pushes women away? No matter how I look at what you said, it doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me.

    Listen, women (for a multitude of reasons) simply don't have go through the problem in the same frequency or severity as men do. Not only are they less likely to have issues with porn to begin with, they also don't go through the same biological issues. Men can literally see their penis slowly start to decrease in functionality (PIED), whereas women don't experience anything close to this. Not suggesting that women have it better or anything, but it is clear as to why more men would be enticed to go to Nofap than women do. Besides, many women are told that orgasm and arousal are simply extremely complicated anyway, meaning that if a woman starts to become extremely desensitized towards real men they may simply think that's perfectly normal, whereas a guy not being able to get it up for a hot girl is always going to raise alarms.

    Although many women do have tons of issues with porn, and there are many who are going through the same bouts that we are, it seems as though females are simply fairing better when it comes to this issue than men are. It should give men relief to know that once they give up on porn they are likely to have a partner that doesn't have the same issue as they once did.
     
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  17. ..Anna..

    ..Anna.. Fapstronaut

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    What did I just read... These words coming from a person who fapped to thousands of naked females.
    Trust me, if a girl has had 10 night-stands before and no big involvement in porn, for her sex in marriage is much, much more meaningful than to a porn addict. As she is used to real body, her thoughts are not floating away, she is used to be present, with connection. While porn addict, who had never had another girl, is thinking about round butts and fake breasts during the intercourse (or other porn-looking like real life women) for being able to finish, he is not really satisfied with wife's body etc. He prefers to sneak to toilet and masturbate thinking about other women, when his wife is next room. Where there is this soul connection?
    You are such a hypocrite.
     
  18. James23

    James23 Fapstronaut

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    This is rapidly turning into a flame war. What I am saying is that even though the sexual outlets of women may be different they are still warping her mind, body, and soul. If some woman wants to keep reading that erotic novel or go to that strip club or have sex outside of marriage I won't stop her, but I am not going to say "good job" to any of it.

    I do think she needs to stop hurting herself and others and I am uneasy about the day when things go bad.

    Just to be clear, what I have done IS bad, but even if it is worse it does not mean the other things women do is somehow good or acceptable in comparison.

    Where is the soul connection for me? I fear it is lost and I want to get some of it back if I can.
     
  19. ..Anna..

    ..Anna.. Fapstronaut

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    I agree with you about things which women are doing while being in relationship, marriage. But if women have had sex with several men before meeting the real one, it is not leaving such a big impact as you think. At least not for sex in the marriage. Sometimes these kind of women, which had enough men in the past, can be more faithful even in the thought level, as they will not ask themselves ''I wonder how it would be this guy from work''.
     
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  20. Star Lord

    Star Lord Fapstronaut

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    You a discriminating against people with porn addiction particularly males, and your comments are very generalistic.
    I think your an extremist feminist.
     
    Last edited: May 1, 2016

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