Why not femdom

Discussion in 'Problematic Sexual Behavior' started by Aust, Mar 23, 2019.

  1. Aust

    Aust Fapstronaut

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    So I am strongly into watching femdom content as well as wearing women's clothing in my bedroom but have actually not seen any femdom content or jerked off to any femdom content or wore any women clothes for the past 3 months.

    After 3 months I am still just as into femdom and women clothes as I was before. I also have a greater desire to lock myself in a chastity cage than I ever have and am considering buying a custom one. I have one plastic chastity cage already but only wore it a few times a while ago as I thought it was bad.

    Can someone please tell me exactly what is wrong with wearing women clothes, femdom and chastity cages? Because the longer I have gone without any of it the more I am wanting it and the less reasons I have not to.
     
  2. Satr19

    Satr19 Fapstronaut

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    Why do you know that something called "femdom" exist? Because you watched porn in your life!
    So it's not your natural state.
    It's also one of the most degenerate kind of porn, that can lead to really bad things and aberrations.
    You stopped watching pornography - great !
    Now stop acting like a woman and fantasizing.
     
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  3. Barroque

    Barroque Fapstronaut

    Yes, exactly. The thing with femdom pornography is that it makes you want to be submissive, and it is the nature of this content, and not only it makes you want to experiment what you see, but also you has the default property of pornography that drives you into more degenerate and depraved content, creating a downwards spiral that make you lose your identity as a man. I myself was also into this kind of content, mostly and to avoid being specific, whenever it showed men being at the hands of women, their pleasure dependant fully of this master-salve relationship as they could not reach for the climax for themselves, you surely have an idea of what I'm talking. The point here is that it made me poison my brain into thinking this was good and should be searched for. While I haven't wear women clothing, I do had some interest in the whole thing of chastity, and even PMO with some content related to it, and it was only a matter of time before I tried it out (alongside other stuff). Luckily, this rebooting process is making me realise how much damage I was doing to my body and mind, and I hope you can get detoxicated soon from your cravings, I still have a long way to travel in that regard. Indeed, Now stop acting like a woman and fantasizing.
     
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  4. Aust

    Aust Fapstronaut

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    Ok. Do you think that by watching women in bondage it would help get my head out of femdom? Like to contrast it and not have it in my mind that women are superior?
     
  5. Aust

    Aust Fapstronaut

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    I actually have another post on this subject if you care to read.
     
  6. Barroque

    Barroque Fapstronaut

    As I see it, watching women being tied up and abused, because I assume you're talking about maledom or BDSM for women, is as bad as the opposite side of the coin. You should see women, maybe not as equals, but as a vital part that makes relations function. Intimacy is more like a game where both parts participate for mutual and individual rejoice, not to reject one the possibility of participate as both -doms indicates.
     
  7. Hoorak

    Hoorak Fapstronaut

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    After i stopped watching this shit ( femdom) i got intense urges to it. It was even a stronger desire than before. The fantasies before sleeping could last several hours, basically till i got exhausted from it and imagined myself in any possible submissive position ( being dominated) . It got pretty extreme, even imagined being really tortured by women, the more perverse, the more disguisting ( like pissing in mouth or whatever) the higher the excitment. But then it dissapears, now i rarely think about, i dont like it , i have only done it because vanilla porn got boring ( like watching a boring love film) . And i dont even want to be submissive" like in real life, in an relationship i want to be the dominant one . whatever
    If u really want to get this thing out of your head, the biggest mistake would be watching it . for me only hardmode worked without masturbation or watching anything arousing. And yeah castity cage is BS why would u like to be in one ?? The excitment last only for a few minutes , the dopamine flows through the brain and then it gets less, u get used to it and then u probably would think why am i doing this whole thing.Think about it .
     
    Last edited: Mar 24, 2019
    Satr19 likes this.
  8. Aust

    Aust Fapstronaut

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    That is a very good point. thank you.
     
  9. Aust

    Aust Fapstronaut

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    Ok. How long did it take of no watching for it to go away?
     
  10. Aust

    Aust Fapstronaut

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    Ok the femdom urges have surprisingly gone down quite a bit since I started this post and they have been the lowest since I have stopped watching femdom content. The only thing is I still have a strong desire to wear women clothes. I steer really anything wrong with wearing womens clothes?
     
  11. Hoorak

    Hoorak Fapstronaut

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    A long time .. Sometimes months. U must be patient. Even if they are less they can get awake again. But it will go away like it came into the brain.
     
  12. Jackb97

    Jackb97 Fapstronaut

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    You are a man. You're meant to dominate not be dominated.
    For anyone that does this shit Knock it off.
     
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  13. Maybe I’m the Dragonborn

    Maybe I’m the Dragonborn New Fapstronaut

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    I can relate. I realized that I needed this website when I found myself fantasizing about recovery from my addiction through means of my addiction. I was fapping while thinking about being punished by my wife for fapping. Pornography changes the way we think. I would get bored of looking at the same images, so I’d search for something a little more obscure and “exciting.” I’d search for drawings and computer generated art, which could be so bizarre as to include men being abducted and experimented on by female aliens. I would get aroused by images of men being humiliated and forced into submission. As far as your question “what’s wrong with wearing women’s clothes, femdom, and chastity cages?” goes, I think you’re only asking because you want to find a loophole and seek out your fantasies in other ways. I would imagine that you, like me, are excited by the feeling of being embarrassed... do you get a thrill when people see you shopping in the women’s department? If the activity turns you on and makes you think about looking at pornography, don’t do it.
     
  14. jack.green

    jack.green New Fapstronaut

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    What you are doing right now is rationalizing my friend. I know because I do it all the time, recognize I'm doing it, and continue to struggle with it. What is morally wrong with wearing women's clothes? In itself, probably nothing. What is morally wrong with femdom? In itself, probably also nothing. My guess is the real problem is part of you knows it doesn't cohere with who you are as a person and why you are on this website in the first place. What's wrong with these things is simple they don't cohere with the best version of yourself. If you succumb to your urge, which I hope you are able to keep yourself from, take note of how you feel immediately afterward. My guess is that you will have the answer there. Maybe it's your girlfriend (or hopes for a girlfriend/long-term partner) who you don't want to disappoint. Maybe it's your social life that will suffer as a consequence of the time and effort you expend on cross-dressing. Maybe it is your family you don't want to find out. Whatever it is, I'm guessing it is what brought you here in the first place. Stay strong.
     
  15. Gvn2Fly

    Gvn2Fly Fapstronaut

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    This isn't the case for everyone or for me. I remember being very young thinking about femdom thoughts like girls walking on me and me kneeling to girls and kissing their feet. I was in elementary or younger and didn't even know what porn/femdom was. I think some dudes are just really submissive and want women to dominate them. It makes the addiction harder because when I found femdom when I was a teenager or in college it was like what I always thought about but never knew could exist. I feel like these femdom thoughts are truly a part of me, and watching femdom is like living a fantasy I have always wanted to live in real life.
     
  16. Orest

    Orest Fapstronaut

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    look man!! you need to realise something,femdom or any fetish caused by porn is created by repetition(masturbating)!!So,if you masturbate as many times you masturbated on femdom on some other kind of porn,it will begin to feel better even if you dont like it in the beginning,maledom is somewhat of a right choice because its not boring but it can be done with other kinds of porn,experiment with it,you may find out you like other categories but dont do it now,just swear to yourself that the next time you relapse(if that happens) it wont be with femdom and trust me,repetition makes any kind of porn feel better,femdom is nothing more than a bad habit!!All im asking you is to replace it with another bad habit thats a little more manageable,this is also used for drug addicts,they make them take less and less powerful drugs so in the end they have less trouble getting rid of their addiction
     
    Last edited: Jun 3, 2019
  17. Freedom_from_PMO

    Freedom_from_PMO Fapstronaut

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    Because you will escalate. You do this because you watched femdom videos and doing this irl will make it worse.
     
  18. ultrafabber

    ultrafabber Fapstronaut

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    It's about male identity and not owning up to your male identity. You are a man but by wearing women clothes you retreat in a fantasy world where you don't have the responsibilities of a man, where you are passive etc.

    It's not normal, it's not natural, it's not healthy.

    Burn the women's clothes and anything else women-related you have.

    Also, it would be best to consult with a psychologist and see why you have low self esteem.

    You also have to stop masturbating completely.
     
    Freedom_from_PMO likes this.
  19. Hoorak

    Hoorak Fapstronaut

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    Low selfesteem comes from watching porn, especially femdom. I experienced myself. Psychologist wont help here much , stop watching this shit, be more productive or whatever. Just dont do the fappimg habbit, its the worst
     
  20. Hoorak

    Hoorak Fapstronaut

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    Gvnfly yes i had some kind of femdom fantasies as a child. But they were fueled and i would say induced by watching some weird things on tv ( it was a scene with a man being dominated) . It scared me to think for myself to be in such a position, but the fear got also excitment. And first i say this scenes and some pictures after that came the fantasies. I would say i am more prone to this dominating stuff . its the way it is. Still never want to be submissive in a relationship, just completly differrnt, i must be the dominant one, the leader
     

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