Why do I feel this lonely

How long have you been doing nofap? Sounds like flatline depression/anxiety. Also, your emotions get strong with nofap. You feel like you wasted a lot of years being addicted. Don't run from those emotions. Feel them and USE THEM to build yourself toward a better you. Those emotions are there for a reason. Yours sound pretty intense though so it sounds like a flatline to me. Eventually you'll start feeling better and those emotions won't be as crippling. They will be in a range where you can use them to benefit yourself

 

You aren't alone in these feelings. One of the things that make this journey so hard is the feelings and thoughts that we experience. Analyze those thoughts and feelings. If you need to, so you don't get overwhelmed, analyze one at a time. If you haven't create a journal and keep track. This addiction is very hard to overcome. You are in the right place so I believe you will be successful. Try not to be hard on yourself and be patient. Take one day at a time. I like @Jesum9 suggestion with use those feelings and make them help you overcome. Stay strong!