When will I start acting like I'm God's princess?

Discussion in 'Women in Reboot' started by Gods_princess, Oct 7, 2018.

  1. Gods_princess

    Gods_princess Fapstronaut

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    That's my plan. I go to Bible studies on Thursdays and the people there are very nice. But not only that. I can really see the love between them and that is a sign of true Christianity.
     
  2. Solomon435

    Solomon435 Fapstronaut

    Aww, the last bit sounded so nice. :)

    I can agree with how good it feels to be praising and reading scriptures. It feels like the holy spirit is with you and it feels so good. Better than PMO, at least.

    For the group of friends it is definitely a problem everywhere. I struggle a little with finding a good group, but then I realized that I shouldn't worry about it. And besides, if we keep the commandments we could be blessed with good friends, no?
     
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  3. Gods_princess

    Gods_princess Fapstronaut

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    DAY 5
    Daily time with God :emoji_white_check_mark:
    Working on my university stuff :emoji_white_check_mark:
    Taking a walk with a guy from bible studies (friendzone bro) :emoji_white_check_mark:

    Urges :emoji_negative_squared_cross_mark:

    I'm gonna say it... I relapsed on last sunday. It had something to do with the telephone chat I went to.
    But it's a new try and I'm not going to give up. I have to stay in Jesus and his word to overcome this sin / addiction / I don't know. Yesterday I've been to Bible studies again which is super helpful. On one hand hearing God's word and talking about it helps me to focus on God. And on the other hand communicating with such lovely people is wonderful.

    Today I was able to get some things done for university. Thanks to God. Tomorrow I will see my family again after two weeks. Looking forward to it!
     
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  4. Gods_princess

    Gods_princess Fapstronaut

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    Actually, I don't think God just gives us good friends just because we keep his commandments. I think he knows what we need and he will give us the right people on our sites if he thinks it's necessary. We just have to be patient.

    I see you're on day 0. Did you have a relapse?
     
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  5. Solomon435

    Solomon435 Fapstronaut

    Well now, you're doing amazing. Bible study sounds like an awesome place to be for love and support. I'm sorry to hear about the relapse but it's good that you kept going after it.

    Yes. I did. I didn't like it and it ended up hurting me a lot more than I'd like, spiritually, mentally and physically.

    I have been inspired by you though. You have a kind of checklist you abide by every day. I want to make my own checklist and go with it everyday. Thank you.
     
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  6. RollerCoaster

    RollerCoaster Fapstronaut

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    I am a Christian but i feel like i have disconnected with god a lot and now i don't find back to him... For instance if i go to church i still feel empty, this used to be different :/
     
  7. theoptimist

    theoptimist Fapstronaut

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    Just for the records, you are a hero. Trust me it took me ages to admit to my brother about the Nofap thing. I lived some tough times too but the good thing is "This will Pass, I promise"

    We and people like us.... went to the PMO because of the tough things that we lived it/experienced it, Be easy on yourself and take it one day at a time
     
  8. Gods_princess

    Gods_princess Fapstronaut

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    DAY 8
    Daily time with God :emoji_white_check_mark:
    Working on my university stuff :emoji_white_check_mark:
    Taking a walk to the store :emoji_white_check_mark:
    Didn't buy crisps / chips when I had the urge to :emoji_white_check_mark:

    Urges :emoji_negative_squared_cross_mark:

    Hello!

    Weekend was awesome. I've been home for the weekend and we celebrated my brothers' birthday whom I told you about. I gave him a notebook so he can write his thoughts down. I hope he uses it. I feel so sorry for him in his loneliness and his sickness. As I told you he's a maniac. But however, it was cool to be with my family. I met my older sisters' new boyfriend. He's very nice and in love with her. But yet, it's sad that they don't believe in Jesus. I really have to pray for them. I thought about having a notebook where I write all prayer requests down because I tend to forget to pray for some things. The birthday celebration was not the only thing amazing this weekend. We had a meeting for people aged between 20 and 30 years in my church. At first I thought I don't wanna go but then I overcame those devillish thoughts. As I told you before I have social anxiety. But this time I was brave through Jesus Christ. I sat down with people and talked to them. I was feeling calm. When I needed a break I went to play the piano and sing and came back afterwards. I had nice talks. I talked to a woman I really admire because she seems to love the Lord. I felt like we had a good connection. Not only the community was great but also the things I learned about God and myself. A woman said that the time we give up for God is not wasted but is instead rewarded highly. God gives us the energy we need for a service. I think about what service I can do for God.

    When I came home from my lecture I thought about chilling the whole evening but then I felt encouraged to revise some notes. It feels so nice to get things done. And I still have time to read this evening. PRAISE THE LORD.
     
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  9. Gods_princess

    Gods_princess Fapstronaut

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    You're welcome. That's great. :)
     
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  10. Gods_princess

    Gods_princess Fapstronaut

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    Do you read the bible and pray regurlary? You have to do that and you have to stay connected to God through your thoughts. I know that feeling but it's usually a sign that I did not spend enough time with God. Pray to him to give you a willing spirit so you feel like you really need that time with him.
     
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  11. Gods_princess

    Gods_princess Fapstronaut

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    Thanks, by the grace and love of God I stand. He gave me the strength to talk to my sisters. I did not tell them about my last relapse. We don't talk about it unless I start telling them about it.
     
  12. Gods_princess

    Gods_princess Fapstronaut

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    DAY 0
    Daily time with God :emoji_white_check_mark:
    Working on my university stuff :emoji_white_check_mark:

    Urges :mad:
    Doing PMO :mad:

    I'm so tired of it all. I found a way to watch P. Talking to a guy in the telephone chat triggered me. I feel so bad. I don't know what to do anymore....

    My plan for today was to fast and to pray for a guy from my church who fell back into drugs. It was my first time fasting. Then I worked on some university stuff but watched youtube videos at the same time. This is when the downwards spiral started. I stopped working on my task and concentrated on youtube. Then I thought it's okay to eat something.. What does it give God if I don't eat anything? So I took some chocolate and ate it. Then I started going to the telephone chat. There was a guy triggering me. I downloaded a browser which actually bypassed my block software. I feel so bad. Had not watched p for a long time. What do you think? What else can I do to stop this endless circle?

    Pls I rly need help. If you're female, Christian and have telegram pls send me a message. I need someone to talk.
     
    Last edited: Nov 21, 2018
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  13. RollerCoaster

    RollerCoaster Fapstronaut

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    Maybe fasting and the abstinence is too much at the same time, try smaller steps
     
  14. Gods_princess

    Gods_princess Fapstronaut

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    I thought I was ready for it but as it seems I'm not.
     
  15. Solomon435

    Solomon435 Fapstronaut

    While I am not female and do not have telegram, I can do my best.

    I guess the first step is to recognize that this was a mistake. This doesn't make you feel truly happy. This doesn't help you accomplish your goals nor get you closer to God. This isn't the kind of happiness you were promised. This brings misery and shame to yourself.

    The next step would be to analyze what went wrong and how to fix it. You say you downloaded a software to bypass your blockers? That sounds like trouble. What can you do to avoid that happening again?

    The next step is to recommit yourself. Remember how you felt with PMO. It didn't make you happy and depending on how you did the act you probably hurt too. You don't want those feelings.

    You will get through this if you do not give up.

    Though you are always welcome to take my advice with a grain of salt.

    Good luck!
     
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  16. Gods_princess

    Gods_princess Fapstronaut

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    DAY 0
    Urges :mad:
    Doing PMO :mad:

    Hey, as you can see I failed. I thought about why I relapse so often. Usually it's combined with a deep feeling of frustration because I could not do something the way I wanted to do it (perfectionist) or I think I'll never find company again. Relapse often happens when I'm alone in my dorm room. Someone gave me the advice to look for community. But you have to understand that this is more than difficult for me. Guys, I really need Jesus. Pls pray for me because I've been seriously tempted the last days and failed so often.
     
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  17. Gods_princess

    Gods_princess Fapstronaut

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    DAY 1
    Daily time with God :emoji_white_check_mark:
    Working on my drawing for university :emoji_white_check_mark:
    Reading :emoji_white_check_mark:
    Having breakfast with a guy from my dormitory (he's taken so don't worry) :emoji_white_check_mark:
    Inline skating and going to the gym :emoji_white_check_mark:
    Cooking :emoji_white_check_mark:

    Urges :emoji_negative_squared_cross_mark:
    Having thoughts about sex :mad:

    Thank God my wifi isn't working. I'm staying at my dormitory for this weekend because people from my bible circle invited me to come to their church on Sunday. As you can see my day has been pretty busy until now. I'm so thankful that I'm saved by grace and not by my works because otherwise I would certainly have to die. This shame I feel once I relapse is seriously bad for my nofap journey because it pulls me back telling me "you won't be able to beat this". I started listening to testimonies if PMO addicted women and it's been really helpful to be. Jessica Harris, a former porn addict had to suffer with similar problems as I do now like a very low self esteem or always wanting to portray a perfect picture and she overcame this addiction by the grace of God. She's now a speaker and author and gives hope to Christian women (or women in general) who are struggling with pornography addiction. I realized that I have to study more about the p addiction to understand it better because in my everydays life I try to avoid thoughts that include anything to do with sex, porn and so on. If anyone has a good suggestion for a book or YouTube vid about women struggling with PMO you're very welcome to share it.
     
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  18. Soldier of God

    Soldier of God Fapstronaut

    Churches, bible studies and Christian fellowship won't save anyone.
    How many of you are actually doing the Will Of God??
    When I was newly born again, I literally mourned after the Will of God because I knew through my experiences after seeking the Truth that He was still alive.
    He took me out of that church, even though you could actually feel the HG there. Instead, He showed me that my duty was (still is) to serve Him on the streets and partly online for FREE and not in the money driven Babylonian system. Only few will make it, how many of them are actually striving to enter the narrow gate?
    How to overcome sin? Be extremely serious, strict and ask the Lord for the cleansing Blood, Power and Guidance. If it's required from you, cut off the the internet. I couldn't do that, my worldly works depend on it. Try to occupy every minute of your time with the Lord.
    Yes, it's extremely hard at the beginning and it takes courage but God won't step aside.
    I was probably more horny than most most of you. I could sleep with elder, not so attractive women which I did earlier. Now, I'm able to look away when I see a really attractive woman. Pretty sure, they look longer at me than I at them, although I still have to improve to bring the demons of lust completely down. Nevertheless, I changed immensely in such a short time.
    We don' have time to be ashamed and there is no point for it, we can't change the past. Instead, look forward and enter the narrow path.
     
    Last edited: Dec 2, 2018
  19. Rio

    Rio Fapstronaut

    It's funny I was going to mention her to you but then I read that you know about her.

    Anne Maire Miller is another author/speaker who talks about her porn addiction. She used to be known as Anne Jackson but unfortunately, she got divorced and changed her name to Anne Maire Miller. The first video was filmed before the divorce and the second one is after it.

    Her book Permission to Speak Freely is about her porn addiction.



     
  20. Rio

    Rio Fapstronaut

    There's also a podcast called Worth Recovery that you might be interested in. As far as I know, it's the only podcast for women with sex addiction. I even listen to it myself because it's the best PA podcast made IMO.

    https://worthrecovery.podbean.com/
     

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