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What is the biggest problem that porn had caused in your life?

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by fenix99, Nov 26, 2016.

  1. SnowWhite

    SnowWhite Fapstronaut

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    well, I really don't understand what could have offended you, but it's up to you to feel offended! ;)
     
    Low and Deadlihood like this.
  2. fenix99

    fenix99 Fapstronaut

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    i know what you mean with "living on the edge" , PMO addicttion takes your energy and confidence so you feel that you cant get involved in a desired relationship, job ,proyect,etc .. until you quit and be your "true self"...
     
    SnowWhite likes this.
  3. SnowWhite

    SnowWhite Fapstronaut

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    Yes, thank you. Exactly that's what I mean.
    All the time, inner doubts and fears are holding you back from a fulfilled living.

    It's like sitting on the side of a pool, and having only the feet in the water, instead of swimming.
     
    fenix99 likes this.
  4. Bigballs

    Bigballs Fapstronaut

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    Many of us have this problem it's also cause I'm stuck in some financial difficulty I can't move at the moment but am seriously working on it
     
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  5. fenix99

    fenix99 Fapstronaut

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    Reading the posts ,i kind of find that one of the biggest problem of a "PMO addicted guy" its loneliness
     
  6. Sojourner

    Sojourner Guest

    Wasted time and money. Lots and lots and lots of wasted time.
     
    ax345 and SnowWhite like this.
  7. Lone_Wolf

    Lone_Wolf Fapstronaut

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    An incredible amount of time wasted.
     
  8. vulture175

    vulture175 Fapstronaut

    severe brainfog and acute anxiety. very terrifying
     
    AndySky180 likes this.
  9. SnowWhite

    SnowWhite Fapstronaut

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    Hmm, for me, the lonelineness itself is absolutely not a problem.

    The problem is "doing something by myself". I mean: Actively pursuing a goal. Being my own boss.

    But whenever I do something on my own, I get doubts if this project is not too big.
    Or I get fears that someboy might call me an egoist.
    Or I get fears that I might hurt somebody else. And so on.

    And then, PMO intercepts.
    PMO is like a honeytrap which carries all my doubts and fears.

    It's like if I want to sail with a boat from my shore to another island. I'm sailing off at sunny weather, and I am seeing my goal.
    But then, a wall of thick fog is appearing (=PMO), it tumbles me around, and I'm getting back to the shore of origin.
     
  10. jdilla97

    jdilla97 Fapstronaut

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    Wasted time, energy, increased anxiety, PIED.
     
  11. lazyleaf

    lazyleaf Fapstronaut

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    Going to bed 30 minutes after the time I should go to bed
     
    jdilla97 likes this.
  12. The biggest problem was that I didnt realize I had a problem for so long or that the effects were so long in developing. Lack of intimacy, social anxiety, inhibiting
    my creative ability...
     
  13. Mark814

    Mark814 Fapstronaut

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    There have been many side effects for me.

    • Wasted days that I could have spent following more active pursuits instead spent indoors in dark rooms wanking away to porn.
    • A sexual view of women that makes me treat my ex-wife, current wife and many of the women I have had affairs with very badly, I am a selfish man who wants sexual contact more than relationship.
    • I have been 'caught' using sex phone lines by both an employer and my current wife.
    • Because I have been into porn since I was 11 and I am now 49 I hunt out harder and darker porn at times to satisfy my craving, the 'normal' man woman stuff just didn't do it for me.
    • When the porn stops and I turn off the screen, there is that moment when I see a reflection of myself in the screen, naked or pants down, sweaty and mostly sad. My face is that of a very sad man, not someone who is enjoying what he is doing.
     
    ax345, TooMuchTooSoon and Burner1 like this.
  14. SnowWhite

    SnowWhite Fapstronaut

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    @vulture175 what is a checkpoint ?
     
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  15. vulture175

    vulture175 Fapstronaut

    @SnowWhite : if you play video games, you know they have "save game" points or "checkpoints" before or after an big event. A checkpoint is simply like that. For example, you wanna write a song or a short story for two months, so a checkpoint can be before you start writing or after you finish writing, or whenever you feel like to put a checkpoint.

    Example:
    2016 August 8th, 2am, checkpoint: hot weather, feeling ok, sitting in my room. start doing mindfulness
    2016 October 25th, 1am, checkpoint: rain, feeling cold, a bit lonely, writing in school library. start learning music
    2017 January 7th, 1am, checkpoint: snow, frezzing, feeling comfortable, enjoy a coffee in a coffee shop. finish a song. start writing another full song.

    So it doesn't matter if i relapse between two checkpints, the progress wouldn't be lost, also i try not focus too much on not fapping, instead replace with something. Counter is useful sometimes but it seems like i focus too much on counting days when using counter.
     
    SnowWhite likes this.
  16. IGY

    IGY Guest

    addiction
     
  17. SnowWhite

    SnowWhite Fapstronaut

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    Ah ok, if I understand, this it is actually a kind of milestone like in project planning.
    And does it work for you?

    My issue is that I actually do planning with milestones (checkpoints?), just PMO is so strong that i forget my own rules.
     
  18. kriss93

    kriss93 Fapstronaut

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    The Biggest issue what porn caused to me was gender identity confusion/disorder.
     
  19. nitsuj0786

    nitsuj0786 Fapstronaut

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    Mine was memory, I have had terrible memory and I am only 30. My wife has gotten on to me about how bad it is. But when I started abstaining from porn and obviously pmo, my memory started to get better and better.
     
    NightReaper775 and Burner1 like this.
  20. Veritech

    Veritech Fapstronaut

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    I cannot stand living a double life.

    On the surface, I am a professional, husband, father and well respected by my peers.

    If they knew about the crap I have been into, I would lose everything. Only I know about this part of my life. This personality makes me lie, quick to anger and languish in guilt.

    Even at my age I am still a young man. If I do not stop acting out sexually now, the question is not if I will lose everything; it is just a matter of when I will lose everything.
     

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