Unlearning porn... learning to live

Discussion in 'Ages 20-24' started by black_coyote, Sep 8, 2017.

  1. Lucid Kazekuro

    Lucid Kazekuro Fapstronaut

    Glad to see you still on these fronts.
    My battles are being fought in another platform.
    I'll make an effort to pay this a visit from time to time.
     
    black_coyote likes this.
  2. black_coyote

    black_coyote Fapstronaut

    Day 36

    So far so good. My main priority is practicing meditation.

    Currently I'm little bit sick, I feel feverish and tired. I find intense resistance to practicing. I guess I must rest.
     
    xBiancaa, jipjap and Lucid Kazekuro like this.
  3. black_coyote

    black_coyote Fapstronaut

    Day 44

    I think I gained the ability to get hard without having to access porn, like in those early teenage days...I can also keep myself away from fantasizing. I just become aware when I'm daydreaming and come back to present.

    Practicing meditation is helping me tremendously. I'm aware of my tendencies to over eat, to deny myself sleep, to procrastinate, I'm aware of my impatience, insecurities, of my unawareness and I move through this maze, one step at a time, with awareness and grace.

    As I make these movements,I observe these tendencies, and take it as it is without adding emotional baggage to it...like, when I see the tendency to take junk food and observe the cravings, I become aware. "I crave to take junk food" and stay there instead of pushing it away or suppressing it. I don't condemn myself, I don't judge myself. I just become aware of that thought, dispassionately, almost lovingly because these are the portals that are actually helping me declutter myself. And as I stay with the thought, a course of action, a response just happens from within that is in harmony with the state of stillness, lightness, ease and relaxation.

    It doesn't always happen, this state of meditativeness, but it is happening more often than before.

    Wish you all strength and peace!


     
    Last edited: Mar 5, 2019
  4. jipjap

    jipjap Fapstronaut

    You're a freaking poet, man! You're going great, keep it up!
     
  5. black_coyote

    black_coyote Fapstronaut

    Day 52

    Going steady...I'm searching for peace, but I forget that peace is the way.

    It is like when you solve problems, new ones keeps coming, may be sickness, may be another situation, challenges are incoming.

    I see my belief that, once I solve something, I can rest peacefully. I feel perturbed by problems instead of realizing that they are in fact opportunities to grow. A man must do what he must, otherwise he is choosing to perish. He has the power to ascend the ladder or descend the ladder. I also realize that how much ever you ascend the ladder, you won't find salvation at the top. The secret is that salvation is within, and if you realize this and internalize this and live this as truth, then you can never descend the ladder.

    I realize these insights, I see my aversion to problems. I see that aversion is because I feel a sense of peace now and I'm scared that activities might ruin this peace. In other words, I'm attached to my sense of peace, I'm clinging on to it like a possession. That's not true peace. That's clinging, that's holding on to the past, that's fear of living in the present.

    You've to let go of the clinging to peace. Stability is a journey, not a destination and for the journey to take place, you must move on and make love with this moment and give it your fullest harmonious expression.

    Wish you peace and strength!!
     
    InspireMe likes this.
  6. black_coyote

    black_coyote Fapstronaut

    Day 57

    Sometimes your plan might fail and you may find yourself at loss, but never despair....you have the power to make the best of the circumstances however adverse it might seem.

    I got up very late today and I was sad, but I didn't stay there for long. I did the workout, practiced meditation, had a meal and got to my tasks. The unconscious me would have sat there in despair and self sabotage for failing to get up early.

    Whatever the circumstance, if you are willing to be the victor and not the victim, you can find a way through and give your best.

    I intend to practice, practice, practice. I intend everyone heals! I intend everyone stay strong! I intend everyone to be the best version of their self!

    Cheers!




     
    InspireMe and xBiancaa like this.
  7. Lucid Kazekuro

    Lucid Kazekuro Fapstronaut

    Instead of being only the friend of my plan, I choose to be friends with 'the things that disrupts' my plan.
     
    black_coyote likes this.
  8. black_coyote

    black_coyote Fapstronaut

    Such a sharp insight my friend! Thank you!
     
    Lucid Kazekuro likes this.

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