Ugh.....start over

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by dundleup, Nov 29, 2016.

  1. dundleup

    dundleup Fapstronaut

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    Tried to get a streak going about ten days ago, but I barely lasted seven days.

    Going to try again. At least I've revived my meditation practice in the mornings. It would probably help if I meditated in the evening as well.

    Evenings when I get into bed are my biggest problem. I wish there was somewhere I could "turn in" my phone before I headed for the bedroom.
     
  2. Low

    Low Fapstronaut

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    can i ask how you meditate and what does it do for you i want too start but not im not sure where to start.
     
  3. dundleup

    dundleup Fapstronaut

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    I do a pretty basic process of focusing on my breaths. I try to do at least 5 minutes, 10 if I have time. I sit on a cushion (a chair works too), relax, and then try to put my attention on my breaths. If a distracting thought comes into my head, I try to gently recognize that a thought has come into my head, literally labeling it "thinking" and then returning my attention to breathing. The process of going back and forth between thoughts and focusing on breaths is the exercise. "How to Meditate" by Pema Chodhron is a great book on this kind of meditation (actually any book by Pema Chodhron is fantastic, especially in the realm of forgiving yourself and moving away from destructive habits).

    Another really good place to start is the 10% Happier phone app. It's based on the book "10% Happier" by Dan Harris (news anchor from Nightline). It has a "Basics" course you can do over several days. Each day there is a little message about mindfulness and then an audio guided meditation exercise. Really good stuff.

    Hope that helps!
     
    Spirale likes this.
  4. dundleup

    dundleup Fapstronaut

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    I should add, the way meditation helps, is that it helps me to let go of distracting and distressing thoughts and emotions. Basically, seeing that thoughts, urges and emotions don't have substance that I have to latch onto. It's a constantly growing process. As you can see by my initial post, it hasn't help me cope with my most difficult urges, but I feel like I'm making progress.
     
  5. Low

    Low Fapstronaut

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    ok thanks for the info.
     
  6. Spirale

    Spirale Fapstronaut

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    Sounds to me like you achieved 7 days without PMO which is nothing to hang your head about.

    Meditation helps me a lot too. I think its important to recognize that your mind is not your true conscious. You are consciousness with an erratic mind, so it is important not to identify yourself with these erratic thoughts and urges. When you meditate you can sit as pure consciousness, watching as thoughts bubble up sporadically and then see that these thoughts are not your pure essence, your true identity, and thus not identify with them. Then try use this throughout the day when silly thoughts or gripping urges overcome you. Become aware, become conscious, stop and see that it is just your mind playing tricks on your true being.

    Peace
     
    Last edited: Nov 29, 2016
  7. Headspace

    Headspace Fapstronaut

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    When I meditate, I usually do it in the evening. I especially enjoy it in the dark with no light except for a candle one or two meters in front of my eyes ;)
     
  8. Spirale

    Spirale Fapstronaut

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    Exactly what i do !
     

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