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Trying to reboot after almost 10 years. Need all the support I can possibly get...

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by ubuntulnx8, May 21, 2018.

  1. ubuntulnx8

    ubuntulnx8 New Fapstronaut

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    For the past 10 years, I have been spending a lot of time and a hell lot of money on chat sites like imlive or camcontacts, trying to fill a void in my life...but not quite successfully. The void still exists as it was a decade back.

    Created multiple IDs, deleted them only to create new ones...just can't seem to kick this habit off. Besides this habit, I have a perfectly reasonable and normal life...pretty decent job, no work issues, in good health....you get the gist.

    Trying to reboot again and counting on all the support that I can possibly get.

    Ever so gratefully,
    Anonymous.
     
    Awakening123 likes this.
  2. Foxhole

    Foxhole Fapstronaut

    Hi pal. Good to have you here! I can relate to your story, even if mine is little different. I had many profiles on chat sites like this although i was in relationship (actually more relationships). I though i have needs my SO can't satisfy. In fact i created this urges by myself.
    I can understand the void, but the thruth is, these sites doesn't fill it. It creates the void.
    All you have to do is to live the real life. Life is messy and uneasy stuff, but its also pretty enjoyable. Push yourself to do the stuff you always dreamt about and let these old shadows behind your back.
    Welcome here. And feel free to reach me, if you wish.
     
    ubuntulnx8 likes this.
  3. ubuntulnx8

    ubuntulnx8 New Fapstronaut

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    Hi buddy,
    Thanks for the word of encouragement. I'm trying.
     
    Foxhole likes this.
  4. ubuntulnx8

    ubuntulnx8 New Fapstronaut

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    I relapsed yesterday. Feeling pretty shut about it now. Any pointers to avoid it?
     
  5. Foxhole

    Foxhole Fapstronaut

    Hi, this is my list how i try to deal with PMO.

    1) Really the hardest thing was to believe I can quit it. I thought im broken, im just dirty kinkster and i can't change.
    But i was wrong. When i understand everything was caused only by porn and there's nothing wrong with me personally it was really easy to shake it of. So i suggest to look for experiences of others here who fight similar issues as you do.

    2) I thought i will have to fight urges all days. But i didn't have to. It turns out that i only have to fight when i face triggers and temptations. It's what you have to get rid off. While you see something that arouse you, look away, think about something else, do something different. Shut down browser, drop the magazine, leave the shop, whatever it takes. I was once in restaurant with erotic art on walls. I just leave immediately and im glad i did. Just stay away from anything even potentionally harmful. No porn, no dating sites, no random surfing through YT.

    3) Embrace boredom as an opportunity to self observation. It's always better to have something noble and meaningful to do. But don't be scared of boredom. You can just sit and meditate, think about your life or pray. You don't have to watch shitty tv shows, play dumb videogames or stuff. And obviously you don't have fap. Do what you want to do, not just kill time.

    4) Make your life better. It helps me in great way. I read books about relationships, about benefits of walking barefoot, about building career. When you learn something new and work on yourself, you dont need to fap.

    5) Try to stay focused. If i have work to do, i only do the work. If i want to use this forum i only use it. Make plan beforehand is always good strategy. I used to kill time on meme sites like 9gag or stuff. Man it was no better than porn. I scroll through it for hours and feel empty in the end. Interesting stuff i observed: The more time i spend there the less i laught at the jokes there.

    6) This is the last point and its just hack to help you with some of the previous advices. I use plugin for facebook that hide the news feed (Kill news feed) so i only see new massages and notifications (i also manage my notifications to see only stuff i care about). I also use some adBlock to get rid off potentialy triggering ads.
     

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