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Traveling and replacements for PM

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by uppershine, Jun 11, 2017.

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  1. Jun 11, 2017 #1
    uppershine

    uppershine Fapstronaut

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    I have been traveling for the past 10 days without my SO and I have found myself in a very complicated place. The last 10 days is the longest I have gone without M in 20 years, and I have avoided P as well. I have been fantasizing about women while in public, reading reddit forums and looking for threads in those forums that discuss sex though not explicit erotica. I did stumble into erotica the other day, but managed to pull out of it without actually M, but it was a close call.


    My SO and I discussed phone or video sex but our timing has not worked out.

    I feel like the Reddit threads are a surrogate for P. I feel like I should avoid them. They are not all, however NSFW. Is this type of compromise damaging to my reboot?

    I don't feel that i need to reset my timer, but I also know this type of behavior is not helping my recovery.

    I go home tomorrow, thankfully and will be able to O with the SO.

    What is you experience with reading pseudo sexual or overtly sexual words when you have a craving for the hard stuff?

    Thwnks
     
    uppershine, Jun 11, 2017
    uppershine, Jun 11, 2017
    #1
  2. Jun 12, 2017 #2
    Veritech

    Veritech Fapstronaut

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    Travel time is usually the "opportunity" that men take to view porn or hire a prostitute.

    The fact that you did not succumb to such vices is to be applauded.
     
    Veritech, Jun 12, 2017
    Veritech, Jun 12, 2017
    #2
  3. Jun 12, 2017 #3
    GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

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    When you say you managed to pull out of it are you describing edging? If so that's actually worse than if you had an O! If you truly want to reboot you need to cut out all of your triggers. Since clearly the above are triggers you must avoid them. Do not replace pmo with your partner which it sounds like you are doing. Learn to not O for periods of time and be okay with that. Sex is about intimacy with a partner not purely a physical release. If you treat it as such you will never recover from your addiction.
     
    GG2002, Jun 12, 2017
    GG2002, Jun 12, 2017
    #3
  4. Jun 12, 2017 #4
    GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

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    I suppose him not hiring a prostitute is a good thing assuming of course he had a problem with that before but it does not seem that he did?
     
    GG2002, Jun 12, 2017
    GG2002, Jun 12, 2017
    #4

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