Tinder!

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by LoyalKnight, Apr 27, 2017.

  1. Tesslynne

    Tesslynne Guest

    Ah, I assumed it was a match of yours you were referring to. Right, of course. No, not everyone can do it. Sometimes my social anxiety extends to texting guys I like, or messaging with Tinder matches! So I think it IS something to be proud of. To talk to a GUY in real life, including with all that shame about being a woman initiating a conversation with shock horror! a man!!! difficult to do. But not impossible.
    Well, I do go to the odd singles event. I did last Saturday night and I am again tonight. I do it for my social skills and conversational skills and to help with my mild social anxiety. And sometimes it's also a laugh. I don't tend to benefit from things like that more than in those ways, but even THAT's really good and beneficial.
     
  2. LoyalKnight

    LoyalKnight Fapstronaut

    Good point. Sorry when I told that messaging is something that everyone can do, it is not. I have no anxiety when talking to people of any kind, the only thing is I hesitate to approach girls. This is not a problem, though. Small steps will leave us to victory, eventually. So, keep your efforts up, and I shall keep mine up as well!

    These single events sound funny, how much do you pay for them? It is certainly a good option to improve your social skills and conversation skills, indeed. Here in Germany they are only directed to older people (I am 18). Cold approach is the only available path for me, seems like!
     
  3. Alyx87

    Alyx87 Fapstronaut

    Used it for a few months and met a few interesting girls as a result.

    But it's too much of a trigger. Don't use it anymore, I'm much more inclined to approach girls in real life now.
     
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  4. Tesslynne

    Tesslynne Guest

    Well that Tinder match said it would be lovely to meet you & I'm nervous cos I'm a curvy girl. I think I said that in my profile I usually do. But I think i should meet him anyway and if he doesn't like me just DEAL with it.

    I'm at a singles event tonight. I find them to be more a social skills practice than anything else though, rather than a good way to meet guys. But I am hoping if I use stuff like tonight to hone my social skills, it will be easier when I DO like a guy.
     
  5. SheMonk

    SheMonk Fapstronaut

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    Yup. Tried it on and off during the past three years or so. Been on 5 dates total.

    Date 1, three years ago turned into a 5 month long I-don't-even-fucking-know-what-that-shit-romance-was.

    The rest were just dates which never went past the first, except one which went on a second where he tried to convince me to suck his dick. Yeah, didn't happen.

    So I deleted my entire profile, and all matches, conversations, everything a few weeks ago. Most liberating thing I've ever done!

    Tinder is absolute garbage 90% of the time, unless you're just looking to hook up. Then it's brilliant.

    But calling it a dating app is misleading as hell. Courtship is dead. #debbiedowner

    Also, I'm celibate so don't even ask me why I was on that app to begin with, LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

    Only positive is, that I am MUCH MORE comfortable approaching men in real life now, and I don't feel awkard on dates anymore.
     
    Last edited: May 8, 2017
  6. LoyalKnight

    LoyalKnight Fapstronaut

    Yep, your experience with tinder just shows how garbage tinder (and online dating in general) is.

    Being confident approaching women, that is what I would like to be. But I know I will be at one point, I just have to keep improving myself!
    Awesome to hear that you can approach men comfortable. How was your first time of approaching, if I may ask? Respect, and keep it up!
     
  7. SheMonk

    SheMonk Fapstronaut

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    Haha, true that. But kudos to those it works for. : D

    Well, I've never really had a problem approaching men. I'm a reserved person, but I am not shy and it takes a lot to make me feel awkward to the point of being shaken out of it. :b
    And my first Tinder date (the one which turned into a 5 months whatever-the-ferk) lasted 9 hours. We just clicked.

    It's not hard talking to people. Just ask them lots of questions as most people love blabbering endlessly about themselves.
     
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  8. ThatGuyWithDonkeyBrains

    ThatGuyWithDonkeyBrains Fapstronaut

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    I've tried Tinder and get literally no matches... I'm right by a big University too. I wouldn't describe myself as hot/sexy/hunk lol but id say im average looking. Maybe my standards are too high but I feel like I swipe right on some pretty questionable girls and still nothing... lol that is kinda mean...
     
  9. SheMonk

    SheMonk Fapstronaut

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    I don't know how men's experience with Tinder is. But I found an interesting profile text was alpha omega for me to swipe right. So write something funny which women can respond to or ask about and see what happens!
     
    Tesslynne likes this.
  10. ThatGuyWithDonkeyBrains

    ThatGuyWithDonkeyBrains Fapstronaut

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    Never thought about that.. I don't think I ever really used anything there I thought it was just about the pictures lol Oh well... i deleted it anyways!
     
  11. LoyalKnight

    LoyalKnight Fapstronaut

    Well I love to speak to people as well, most of my friend view me as self-confident. What they do not know though is that I never approached a women, I am always backing of in the same moment..!

    Good job, welcome to the "never online dating" club again! We both have to approach women IRL, that is the only way!
     
  12. SheMonk

    SheMonk Fapstronaut

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    But what stops you in the moment? : )
     
  13. SheMonk

    SheMonk Fapstronaut

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    I'm sorry if this comes off as rude, it really isn't! But I love the detached way you retell these stories. For some reason I find your rhetoric humorous.
     
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  14. iceman40

    iceman40 Fapstronaut

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    I have tried Tinder but no luck. My brother who is very good looking meets women left and right. My conclusion: if you are a handsome guy or hot chick you will do good on Tinder. As for as the rest of us, meeting face to face is the best.
     
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  15. MasturbatieAtelier

    MasturbatieAtelier Fapstronaut

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    Appearently my face works better in real life than on a digital profile. Many of my relapses have started with seeing a sexy girl on Tinder.
     
  16. aingdk11

    aingdk11 Fapstronaut

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    In her
    In here southeast asia tinder use 70% for finding real relationship 30% hookup so depend on the country too.loo btw just had hook up with 19yo german traveler girl its was really fun.goodluck for u
     
  17. Skywalker.89

    Skywalker.89 Fapstronaut

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    the problem with face to face interactions is statistics. roughly a third of women are already in a relationship, another third are not interested(usually lie about being taken), leaving a third that are open but then you have to rely on her finding you attractive. all my relationships happened through face to face whether it was through friends, school, or work. i have found women that were attracted to me in night time settings (bars,night clubs, randomly outdoors around other people) but were one night stand situations. i'm looking for more than just a casual hook up. i live in a small town that makes it hard to meet women to approach. i'd be inclined to give tinder a try but after i've completed a respectable amount of time no pmo'ing. aiming for 90 days and beyond.
     
  18. LoyalKnight

    LoyalKnight Fapstronaut

    It is ultimately your choice, but I would suggest not to. Tinder made me relapse without touching anything, it just came out when I stretched it.... On day 92.

    Now, after realizing that IRL is the only way I also feel way better. Your call here, but consider my experience.
     
  19. Skywalker.89

    Skywalker.89 Fapstronaut

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    i'd like nothing more than irl but like i said i live in a 1 horse town. i need a bigger demographic (metropolitan area) or go to school.
     
  20. Freefaller

    Freefaller Fapstronaut

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    Not sure if it is available in all areas but I highly recommend Coffee Meets Bagel. Great app if you are hoping more than a hook-up.

    I'm not the best looking guy or the most buff but I have received some quality matches and even went out on a few dates.
     
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