Time to stop it

Hi
How are you all ?
I think all of you know what is MO quitter is going through
And that huge struggle between doing it and feeling of shame and remorse,
I do want to share with you what i've been through,
It is just something in my head cant be out.
Every time i say i wont back and then i forget every thing when that desire comes,
I asked god a lot to help me
But something deep inside keeps telling me that i have to change first what inside me and then god will help ,
I cant ask god help and doing what i want and watching porn and then i get mad when i came back to it

Today I'm going to change,
Im going to become more stronger
I know it is deadly hard to stop and
i have to know that it wont be easy at the beginning ,
Im going to progress my determination and my persistence day by day,

All i want is just to feel that i can do it and strong enough to stop it.