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Thoughts about the incels

Discussion in 'Off-topic Discussion' started by MrDetermination, Oct 28, 2018.

  1. MrDetermination

    MrDetermination Fapstronaut

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    I've heard recently about the "incels". What is this thing? What are your thoughts about them?
     
  2. The digital age has made everyone's social problems worse. Social media breed envy and the whole web is a sedative which lets us forget the real world and real relationships. The result is that some kids who are narcissistic and entitled - who would otherwise have lots of people around them - isolate themselves and suffer because they don't get the attention they so desperately want. They become addicted to pitying themselves for their "situation" - no sex. They first start blaming their appearance (the incel forums are full of discussions of facial parameters which influence attractiveness and so on) or supposed mental illnesses and eventually what they see as an antagonistic society. At that point it's not completely unthinkable to go out and kill people. Self-pity is a hell of a drug.
     
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  3. lolos

    lolos Fapstronaut

    Incel means involuntarily celibate. I think its pretty sad. I'm willing to bet most of these boys (big emphasis on boys, not men) grew up with single mother or without a masculine role model. Incels usually bear no similarities to men, apart from having a penis. They were not raised to embrace their masculinity, but rather to suppress it or they will put it towards unhealthy activities, such as gaming or masturbation. The suppression of their testosterone alongside feminist conditioning leads to boys becoming incels.

    I see these boys with no dad, at the bottom of the social hierarchy and with little drive for anything and it deeply saddens me. They rationalise their lack of success in different ways, but most of them become bitter and resentful, which makes it even harder for them to change their ways. It saddens me even more that society is trying to normalise single mothers and even applaud them, and also to get rid of positive male role models. It really fucking sucks.
     
  4. Gotham Outlaw

    Gotham Outlaw Fapstronaut

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    There are 2 things you need to know about incels.

    1. Incels are misogynistic retards who are pissed off that they can't get laid.
    2. Stay the fuck away from them.
     
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  5. MrDetermination

    MrDetermination Fapstronaut

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    What do you mean?
     
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  6. MrDetermination

    MrDetermination Fapstronaut

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    The absence of a positive male role-model might be at play here. However, I beg to differ on what you stated about single mothers:
    The reason why people encourage them is because of the tremendous amount of bravery it takes (our highly judgmental society doesn't accept them that much).
    I think you're a bit pointing towards an easy scapegoat, am I wrong?
     
  7. I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of them are porn/masturbation addicts just like us.
     
  8. I’ve heard of the term before but I wasn’t aware of how truly disgusting the community was until after the van attack in Toronto. I looked into some the subreddits and its beyond disturbing. These guys blame women for their celibacy, love bashing women and even advocate rape.

    I saw this post on reddit yesterday.. basically about a dad who gave up on his son who is a part of the incel community. The story might be fake but the son does fit every stereotype of an incel.
     
  9. Gotham Outlaw

    Gotham Outlaw Fapstronaut

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    I just read this. They're even more fucked up than I thought
     
  10. AtomicTango

    AtomicTango Fapstronaut

    An incel at their core is just someone who wants to have sex/a relationship but for whatever reason doesnt have one and/or cant have one. This sometimes manifests itself into hatred of those who they believe "owe them" sex/a relationship, which is usually a woman. This isn't to say that women cant be incels in the plain definition of the word, or that non-straight men cant be, it just seems that most of the people who subscribe to this "incel ideology" are bitter and or self-hating straight men who project this resentment onto others. Rather than trying to better themselves in any way, they congregate onto forums and other places online where they feed off of each others negativity. I think in a lot of ways, porn addiction can lead to being an incel, due to how porn affects ones view of sex and relationships, but I also cant help but lay some of the blame at bad parenting and societal attitudes too.
     
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  11. lolos

    lolos Fapstronaut

    I don't think single mothers are brave. It's not like they have much of a choice, If their husband leaves or dies they can either give the kid up or raise it, and most women wouldn't be able to live with themselves if they gave their kid up. So they aren't choosing to be a good mother, it is just their biology. My sister and I were raised without a dad because he passed away when we were young, and I would not call my mum brave. Yes, she is an excellent mother and she puts us above all else, but that is what mothers do.
     
  12. I haven't investigated this in depth and have not investigated the "community" at all. But based on the "involuntarily celibate" thing, I happen to wonder if I am an incel, given that I am a 35 year old virgin. Granted I've never actually tried to get laid, I've just whacked off to porn my whole life. I've not developed the skills to get laid if I wanted to, though, I am trying to work on it. It is not hard for me to see why the incel thing is a growing "problem". I am an opponent of feminism, and it makes sense to me that the plague of feminism and misandry is related to the rise of the incels. I think a certain amount of frustration and resentment is perfectly understandable and justified. That being said, I think if incels have a problem with their "condition", it is because they are overvaluing sex, they are buying in to society/culture's overvaluation of sex, so the solution is to stop valuing it
     
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  13. Jason_Tesla_19

    Jason_Tesla_19 Fapstronaut

    I'm a 31 year old virgin, and it's not because there's something physically wrong with me, like hormone levels. It's not like I started off with no drive to make something of myself, or that I'm a "boy", not a "man". I'm a broken shell of a man, just a shadow of the potential I had before going through hell, not to complain about my life. I'm not diagnosed, but I'm quite possibly high-functioning autistic, and I wasn't properly socialized as a child. I was bullied as a child, and was never accepted by my peers growing up, so I didn't start developing social skills until basically adulthood. Yes, I've struggled with porn and masturbation, but I have trust issues, intimacy issues, anger issues, abandonment issues, and self-esteem issues. Even when I was younger, fit, and relatively social, I had little success with women. Women weren't attracted to me even when I was in better physical shape than most people, I guess because I was socially awkward and "low status", even when I was active duty military, and it's generally easy for most men in uniform to find women. I had a very religious upbringing, and that did affect my attitudes regarding sex. I've had a handful of opportunities to have sex, so technically I might not be "incel", but by the definition of currently not being able to find a girlfriend, yes, I'm an "incel". I have no interest in casual sex, though. I want more than just a good time with easy women, so I might not be "normal".

    Now, everyone read this whole thread very carefully. Look at where all the hatred and vitriol is coming from. The non-virgins are spewing toxicity towards virgins! That's only feeding the fire. People can internalize that into self-hatred and other-hatred, even more than constant rejection destroys their sense of self-worth. Humans are social creatures, and everyone deserves to love and be loved, but that doesn't give anyone entitlement. Constant romantic and sexual rejection hurts because people are saying you have no value, and you should essentially go die somewhere, or at least your genes should. Your core biological programming is being violated. Your "survival" is being threatened, and people wonder why incels have mental health issues, and sometimes resort to violence. It's a testament to civilization that so many incels do in fact essentially "go gentle into the night", suffering in silence and watching their bloodlines die with them.
     
  14. AtomicTango

    AtomicTango Fapstronaut

    This is the kind of thing I was referring to in my post when I said I partially blame societal attitudes for the rise of incels. Obviously as a species we value sex, relationships and procreation, but as a society we value a warped understanding of sex that allows many people to simply fall through the cracks so to speak. People use the term as a blanket insult along the lines of "cuck" and "****" (it really is the male equivalent of **** when you think about it, even if the words have the opposite meaning) and all it does is reinforce the ideas that an incel might already have.

    I do have to say this though; in the truest sense of what the word actually means, I could be considered an incel, and while I am not offended by people using the word as an insult, I do have to question why people are so eager to conflate someone like myself, a guy who wants to be in a relationship but isn't because I am trying to sort myself out first (with regards to PMO addiction, self improvement, and other factors) with some bitter guy on Reddit or wherever who hates women and wants to legalise rape. Its easy enough to say "well when we say incel we arent referring to people like you", but then the easy response to that is "then why did you say incel and not 'misogynist'?"
     
  15. Good post Jason
     
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  16. lolos

    lolos Fapstronaut

    It has everything to do with biology. You ever heard of maternal instinct?
     
  17. I think one thing that incels could benefit from is learning about The Red Pill perspective regarding women and sex. It has helped me. It dispenses with all of the idealizations that incels with a Blue Pill perspective tend to have I think. The Red Pill exposes some hard truths, but after they are accepted, the frustration and anger go away, because you're no longer chasing an impossible ideal that you felt you were entitled to
     
  18. BloodHunter321

    BloodHunter321 Fapstronaut

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    victims of society and hypergamy
     
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  19. lol
     
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