The Law of Attraction

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by SorryWontSayIt, Sep 3, 2018.

  1. SorryWontSayIt

    SorryWontSayIt Fapstronaut

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    Hi,

    First of I will just make it clear I am a bit sceptic. But I also like a lot of the idea behind the law of attraction.

    When people think positive and create a positive attitude, they will normally attract other positive people to them.
    When people are negative and create a negative attitude, they will normally attract other negative people to them.

    Like attracts like.

    But then there are those who talk about emotions. Energy in motion. They talk about asking, reciving and letting go, etc.

    They talk about manifesting something into your life. Which I belive is partly true as I talked about above.
    But then there are those who talks about manifesting a text from a special someone or money. And they are saying it worked.
    There are millions of comments and forums where people saying that it worked for them.

    Is this just complete bullshit?
    (If you have ever tried it and it worked for you, it would be fun to read how you did it and what you wanted - and got from it).

    I myself, want to belive it, but I am very sceptical about the energy in motion part. I can understand that energy around you can be picked up by others. For example if you are at school with a positive attitude, others will see it and be attracted to you.
    -This part I really feel is connected to NoFap in many ways. When we start to reach our benefits, we change in a positive way, which will attract other positive things into our life. We will become more confident, open, happy, more energy etc. Which will lead to attracting people that are like minded and equal to our happiness and energy.

    From my own experience. I have noticed just now, that the happier I am around people the more attracted people are to me. The more closed up and sad I am around people, the less attracted people are to me.

    Only the last part makes nofap worth it to me. Happiness will create more happiness. It will attract happiness, and happy people.

    Would be fun to hear other experience regarding this! :)
     
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  2. tweeby

    tweeby Banned

    Reminds me of that book, 'The Secret'
     
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  3. ivanhoe

    ivanhoe Fapstronaut

    I would go with mostly bs.....
    Does someone who gets raped 'attract' it or a baby who dies from a terrorist explosion 'attracting' it? I don't think anyone would really think so, or at least I hope so (that's not to say we can do stupid things that raise the likelihood of something bad happening, like that well intentioned but naive couple that road their bicycles in Isis territory to prove 'islamaphobic' stereotypes are bad or something like that...

    I agree with you about positive upbeat people attracting one another and visa versa- it's very important who you hang around - one reason we're all here (hopefully) with a similar sense of purpose...

    Visualization is important for anything but ... the idea of just sitting there waiting for something to fly into your lap because you're willing it is just silly.
     
  4. HelplessPleaseHelp?

    HelplessPleaseHelp? Fapstronaut

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    I believe the truth is somewhere in the middle. Of course that if you will wait all the day for something to happen and you will think about it constantly but will not do anything in the direction to achieve it, well the odds are probably against you.
    However, when you are trying to achieve something, you have a better chance to get it if you are truly believe that you can have it. This is when the visualisation part begins. If you visualize something enough, until it is clear in your mind and you can describe someone else exactly how it feels to have it, although you still don't have it, then it is the moment where you are half way through reaching that goal.

    I suggest you hearing audio of sadhguru on law of attraction in Youtube. Great speech. Changed my life.
    Also if you want more material on law of attraction you can go look for Abraham Hicks, she also has some insightful audios in Youtube.
     
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  5. ivanhoe

    ivanhoe Fapstronaut

    not all the time that's the strange thing.. a lot of successful /creative people say they doubted themselves and never thought they would achieve 'x' - it could be not putting any value in outcomes makes us perform better ... in some cases...
    I would say rather than believe this 'law' of attraction study research-based and evidence based methods to achieve whatever it is you're trying to achieve.
     
  6. elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

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    There's so much going on around you everyday. Way too much stimuli for you to notice everything. Your brain filters what is most important to you at the moment and that's what "shows up" in your life.

    When you desire something or you have an emotional attachment to it (positive or negative) then that's you telling your brain that it's important to you. That's what your brain gathers to reinforce what's important to you. So that's what your brain filters to show you. Maybe it's not a million dollars, but maybe it's the small steps or information that leads to a higher chance of creating that possibility.

    This is why when you're having a bad morning and you choose to dwell on the negative, your whole day spirals downwards. Because that's you telling your brain what's most important (the belief that you're having a bad day and everything is negative).

    If having a better fashion sense recently became a priority for you, then you'll start noticing people with a great fashion sense in order to help you on that path. You start taking notice, learning, and taking steps towards that goal. Eventually you have an improved fashion sense.

    It's not magic.

    This is the extent of "attracting" external things to you that I personally believe.
     
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  7. SorryWontSayIt

    SorryWontSayIt Fapstronaut

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    Good point. I really hope there is not something like that. Or maybe the evil belive strong enough if I should "try to belive in LOA" and not be sceptic to it? But I won't put too much tougth it to the "manifesting" stuff since I am not sure about this stuff.

    But I will keep focusing on the positive attract positve, to keep myself moving forward! :)

    Great example!

    Had a bad year so far, but the last week I start my day by telling myself that this is going to be a good day! And I try to view everything that is great in life. And if I struggel with something I try to see if there anything that can give a positive outcome of it, because a lot of the time there is - we don't always see it (if it is difficult or we don't have motivation).

    I simply try to change my mind to become more positive to attract more positivity and positive people. Actually worked so far :)

    Yeah, the book talks about it, I think (?). I do at least have a lot of the same idea.
     
  8. rule4

    rule4 New Fapstronaut

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    Hi - thanks for this post.

    To maintain your attention for a little while longer I'll start with this. The "Law of Attraction" absolutely works. It has worked for me personally - and some of the most successful people I know who have achieved things that seem beyond what is reasonable have utilized it as well.

    Here's the problem: The scientific explanation that they pose is abhorrent and ruins the legitimacy of an otherwise powerful idea. After the practices worked for me on several occasions my mind has been open to finding new ways of interpreting how it works. I think the best articulated scientific, psychological perspective on why the Law of Attraction might actually work is based in psychology - not some shoddy interpretation of quantum physics. The best way I've seen it described is by Dr. Jordan Peterson in this video (which is lengthy - but if you're interest in the Law of Attraction it is well worth it). This is a Psychology University Course taught at the University of Toronto - not some self help guru.



    (Start at 19:35 for shortcut)

    Here's my summary of the major idea and how it relates:

    What do you see when you encounter an object?
    You think you see: “Object > Perception > Cognition > Action
    You witness the object, you perceive it, which drives cognition and ultimately you react to it.

    When robotics engineers tried to re-create human like machines, they encountered a massive problem. The problem of perception. The reality is the above explanation for how we encounter objects is not even remotely close to how our brain works.

    It’s actually: “Meaning > Object > Cognition > Action”

    So for example: Instead of seeing: *Cliff*, then thinking "I could fall off that", then thinking "I should stay away from that" and ultimately you move away from it ... we actually see the clif and think

    "That is a thing I could fall off" > It looks similar to other things I could fall off, like a cliff > I should stay away from that > you move away from it.

    All of this to say - if you can manipulate your subconscious mind to prescribe new meaning to certain objects or opportunities which would ultimately help you meet your desired end - you'll "attract" those experiences into your life. In reality, you're not attracting them. You're seeing objects that have always been there - but by changing the meaning you seek, things that would have never stood out before stand out to you now.

    Your AIM structures your perceptions. Rewire your brain for a new aim and the world will present itself differently to you.


    Hope this helps
     
    Last edited: Sep 6, 2018
  9. BestVersionToday

    BestVersionToday Banned

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    There is value in it but its bullshit. Its nothing spiritual, its science. The universe doesn't do shit okay, if you think about wealth and believe you can be wealthy you may look into some strategies (which you may lose all your money) but what it done for me is it kept my mind on my goals.

    I skimed over your post, something about thinking his girlfriend would text him and she texted him, that's called coincidence my friend.
     
  10. SheMonk

    SheMonk Fapstronaut

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    Sometimes I think people get too caught up in the 'what and how is it' rather than just enjoying 'what it does'. I wholeheartedly believe in the law of attraction, but to me it's not important how it works/if it's magic/if it's psychological/if it's related to quantum physics, as I just so happen to find that it does indeed work regardless of what it is.

    Like, I don't care how electricity works, just that it powers my appliances. I know how to operate my appliances via switches and it's the same with LOA. I don't know why/how it works, but I just know how to tap into it and utilize it. And that's all you really need if you're looking to manifest.

    I wholeheartedly take the LOA seriously and have worked with it quite often, and have attracted and manifested incredible things. I do believe like attracts like, in that you're much more prone to get along with people (or at least attract) who are on the same vibe (vibration) as you. Ever heard the saying 'your vibe attracts your tribe'? I completely agree with this.

    Let's take the example of positive and negative people. Usually when you put a very optimistic positive person next to a pessimistic negative person, these two individuals will clash, find one another annoying or irritating. They operate from different points of a certain spectrum, and therefor don't match. Sometimes negative people (low vibration) will be attracted to positive people (high vibration) but often you find that the positive person will be reluctant to deal with the negative person, because low vibrations are draining to those on a higher vibration.

    You may also find that if you are surrounded by low vibration people and friends, and you yourself move into a higher vibration, you will start noticing how these low vibration people will disappear out of your life. Either they complain about you having changed in an attempt to drag you back to their vibration or you just outgrow each other, because you no longer vibe. It can also be the other way around: if you and a friend are both high vibration and your friend moves down into lower frequencies, you might do what you can to help that person back into a higher vibration, which may or may not work. It goes both ways.

    I PERSONALLY find that it kinda works the same way, when you want to attract and manifest via LOA. It is of UTMOST IMPORTANCE how you go about it. First of all, it is about vibration (and emotion) not about what you say. You absolutely have to believe that what you want to manifest, is already yours. You have to match the vibration of the thing you want, as if you already have it. You have to act as if it's already yours. You could say you have to be what it is you want to attract. So if you want love, be loving. If you want happiness, be happy. If you want wellbeing, prioritize your wellbeing, etc.

    The LOA grants you your focus.

    Say you want to manifest a loving relationship. You then keep thinking "omg, it would be so awesome having a loving girlfriend!" The problem with this particular thought process, is that it comes from a place of LACK. You are basically saying you DON'T have a girlfriend, but you'd like one. The DON'T meaning you LACK it. So that lack is the focus you vibrate from, and is what the LOA will give you more of. The LOA will give you exactly what you focus on.

    Instead you can switch it around and say "fuck yeah, I love being in a loving relationship with my fucking amazing girlfriend!" and then focus on the actual emotion of wellbeing, love, compassion and so on, that you would have in such a relationship. Fake it til you make it, baby! Practice invoking those loving feelings, and you will start attracting love from the external world. Do you see the difference? Here you operate from a point of already having awesome love in your life, and because that is your focus and your vibe, LOA shall provide more of that.

    It worked for me, btw. I am 9 months into the most amazing relationship I've ever had, and I used a LOA technique to attract him. I sat down one night after being fed up with Tinder hell, and wrote a very thorough list about the QUALITIES I wanted in a LIFE PARTNER (not a boyfriend - but a LIFE PARTNER). I was very careful to write everything from a point of ALREADY HAVING and not a point of lack.

    Wrong way to phrase a desire: I want a loving, healthy relationship. I want my girlfriend to love me unconditionally. I want her to be attracted to me.
    (Here you are operating from a place of LACK. You WANTING something means you don't already have it = LACK = that's what you'll get more of - LACK!)

    Right way to phrase a desire: Our relationship IS loving and healthy. Our love IS unconditional and true. WE ARE extremely attractive to each other (DO NOT write physical specifics such as hair color, eyes, height, race - only qualities such as 'attractive to me / each other' and don't ever write about someone you already know (if your perfect match happens to be someone you know, then LOA will provide. But don't try to attract specific individuals per default - you don't want to attract someone who may be good, when you can actually attract someone who is beyond great. That's my opinion, anyway.)).
    (Here you operate from a place of ALREADY HAVING - which is the secret, and therefor this is what the LOA will provide. See the difference?)

    But writing it is only going to get you so far. As said, you have to BELIEVE it. No, you have to fucking KNOW IT to be true. When I made my list, I was so friggin' into the vibration I got a feeling that this person was already in my life. I slept on that list (and have slept with it ever since) and THE VERY NEXT DAY my current partner (who I had chatted very sporadically with online, on and off about nothing speciel, for a few years) asked me out, and we've been rocking it ever since that day (nine months now) - he ticks all the fucking boxes on my very specific list. It's uncanny!

    RECAP:

    1) Decide what you want (and possibly find a LOA ritual to match).

    2) Act as if and believe it's already yours. Do whatever you can to invoke the feelings you'd have if you had what you desire. If it's love, recall POSITIVE loving moments of your life and feel the warmth spread in your being. Do this as often as possible. This puts you in the right vibration.

    3) Let go - meaning let go of HOW it is provided to you. Your only job is to know what you want and match the vibration. Leave the rest to the Universe, and it shall provide when the time is right. This is what the "let go" part of LOA means.

    4) Don't EVER operate from a point of lack. Ever. It's in your power to have whatever you want.

    5) Enjoy your life.
     
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  11. SorryWontSayIt

    SorryWontSayIt Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for all the responses! :)


    Thank you!

    Will do as you have described! There is nothing to lose from doing it and beliving :)

    I guess I just have to figure out this part:

    "Right way to phrase a desire: Our relationship IS loving and healthy. Our love IS unconditional and true. WE ARE extremely attractive to each other (DO NOT write physical specifics such as hair color, eyes, height, race - only qualities such as 'attractive to me / each other' and don't ever write about someone you already know (if your perfect match happens to be someone you know, then LOA will provide. But don't try to attract specific individuals per default - you don't want to attract someone who may be good, when you can actually attract someone who is beyond great. That's my opinion, anyway.)).
    (Here you operate from a place of ALREADY HAVING - which is the secret, and therefor this is what the LOA will provide. See the difference?)"


    In one way I want to manifest a spesific girl I really miss (we still text sometimes), but I want something more out of it. But at the same time you made a really great point.

    And after what I understand, you talk about don't be too specific regarding their haair etc. Do you mean that I should be describing more the feeling from the relationship, and what kind of relationship and personalities and qualities I am looking for? correct?
     
    Last edited: Sep 9, 2018
  12. ivanhoe

    ivanhoe Fapstronaut

    so if a child gets raped... it's because they are attracting it?
     
  13. elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

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    Think of it like a GPS device.

    You have a destination. Along the way you hit unexpected road blocks. The GPS device doesn't just give up and dwell on the road block. It explores new paths to get to the destination. Eventually you get to the destination, but if the GPS device was only willing to accept that one specific route and didn't allow for any other possibilities then you wouldn't have made it to the destination.

    So when you focus, believe, and work on certain things long enough, you're able to achieve some of those things. Then you can say "I attracted it via the universe"... but it's kind of discrediting yourself. It's chalking it up to magic rather than your own consistent focus / efforts.

    Your destination should be something like "a healthy and loving relationship." Not something specific like "I want the universe to give me that blonde I have a secret crush on." Because with the possibility of that not working out, you've hit a road block to your destination. If you dwell on that road block, you'll never allow other possibilities (other routes) to your desired destination.

    The less stories and expectations you have about how things are supposed to be, the faster and more probable you'll get to your destination.

    "It was supposed to be this specific person / job / car."
    "I wasn't supposed to fail or get rejected."
    "I was supposed to have it by now."

    From my personal experience, I can tell you that my life is completely different from what my past self wanted. Different from my "how it's supposed to be." And I'm glad for it. I'm glad I allowed myself to move on from various life road blocks and explore other routes to my destination.
     
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  14. SorryWontSayIt

    SorryWontSayIt Fapstronaut

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    Wow! Thank you so much!

    You made my last question pretty simple to answer for myself now. I won't let myself hit a road block, I will try to be more open for possibilites.
    Hopefully I will learn that the other routes to my destination was worth it! :)
     
  15. elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

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    Get to those road blocks as fast as possible.

    If you want something, then go for it. If it doesn't work out, then you can move on to other possibilities. Follow your desires fully, but don't be attached to your concept of how things are supposed to be. The faster you get rejected, the sooner you can move on to people that are interested in who you are. The more you fail, the more experience and competence you can gain at something.

    It's like if I went to the grocery store and I really want apples, but for whatever reason they ran out of apples. Do I dwell on that and starve to death? Or do I seek other possibilities? Do I explore other stores? Do I try other food products that the store has to offer? If I dwell on the road block that they didn't have any apples, I wouldn't have the awesome experience of trying something else (bbq chicken / orange juice / white chocolate cookies / passionfruit yogurt / etc).

    Don't avoid or dwell on the road blocks. Go for what you want fully. So that it can either work out or you can move on to other possibilities faster. Have less stories and expectations of how things are supposed to be.
     
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  16. SheMonk

    SheMonk Fapstronaut

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    You can try to manifest her in the way you want. Just remember to do it from a point of already having the relationship you want with her. Not from a point of lack (you don't have her right now).

    But I'm glad you get my point.

    Yes. Be descriptive in how you feel in your perfect relationship and phrase it and believe it as if it's already your reality.

    The problem with writing out exactly how the person should look like, is that you're narrowing down your options. Say you want a short blonde girl with blue eyes who has all the qualities of your dream girl. Then you leave out all the other women with same qualities who happen to have black, red or brown hair and a different height. You see?

    So rather be unspecific and use the words "extremely attractive TO ME or EACH OTHER". If you only write "she is extremely attractive" then you have not specified to whom. To you? Or to someone else? And what about her attraction to you? Therefor be specific that she is attractive to you and you are attractive to her. You really have to nail the right phrasing.

    Saying you want her to be loving and kind. That's not enough. Specify what that means to you. "She is loving and kind to me and others. We are loving and kind towards each other."

    Other examples of how to phrase:

    "We are both committed to our loving relationship and we do our best to make sure there is space for both of us. We are both committed to make our relationship ground for personal growth and we support each other with unconditional love, patience and understanding."

    Example of what NOT to write:

    "She will never cheat on me." Here you are putting in a negative focus - cheating. Even if you write that she will never do that, you still have the energy of cheating on your list. Instead write the positive variant:

    "We are monogamous and faithful to one another of our own free will. We have complete trust in each other."

    See the difference? Good luck!
     
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  17. vulture175

    vulture175 Fapstronaut

    If it's true, then healthcare system should fk off itself lol. Hospital did not exist, nofap did not exist, anonymous alcoholic program did not exist, spirituality did not exist, vaccine for any disease did not exist... and empathy did not exist, love did not exist. Sounds like the law of destruction to me.
     
  18. SorryWontSayIt

    SorryWontSayIt Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for clearing things up for me! :)

    There is nothing to lose, so why not belive in it :)
     
  19. oneaffidavit

    oneaffidavit Fapstronaut

    We always have too much information surrounding us. Our brains are designed to selectively remember stuff.

    Let me ask you this: What did you on your birthday in 2017?? I think you might remember how day went. If I ask you what did you do on 17th August 2017?? I don't think you can recall what happened.

    Basically, our brain remembers stuff which is deemed important according to the circumstances and situations.

    Law of Attraction is nothing but confirmation bias working on large scale.

    What is confirmation bias?? Let's say we are having an argument about whether stress is good or bad. You might say stress is bad. Then, I jump into the discussion and tell you that stress is actually good. I refer to research studies which tell stress is good and you are going to refer to research studies which tell stress is bad.

    In each of our perspectives, we are right. There are studies which tell stress is bad and also there are studies which tell stress is good. I am just looking at stress in good angle and you are just looking at stress in bad angle. We are both trying to support our claims by showing some research which confirm what we say.

    However, the truth is that we are just stuck in confirmation bias. My brain is selectively choosing good stuff about stress and strengthening my beliefs and you are selectively looking for bad stuff about stress and strengthening your beliefs.

    Another example, I might say I am a good person and I would give 100 examples where I helped others and how altruistic I was. However, there are also situations where I acted like an idiot hurting other people's feelings. When I define myself in positive angle, my brain will start to ignore bad stuff I did. When I define myself in negative angle, my brain starts to think of all the horrible stuff I did in my life.

    Another popular example is this, you have no idea which car to buy and when you start searching for cars, suddenly, the cars you seen appear everywhere around you. Those cars always existed but you weren't paying attention.

    Same thing about celebrities. When you start knowing a celebrity, you start recognizing more news about the celebrity than before. It's just that you are starting to pay attention to the information after getting to know about the celebrity but that celebrity has always been in news before.
     
  20. EthanW.

    EthanW. Fapstronaut

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    "Power perception," as described by gurus and self-help peddlers seems to be largely bullshit. There are things that you can control, and things you cannot control. I can control my anger, or my joy, but there is no known kinetic or chemical methodology for controlling a spacial environment external to my mind, or objects not biologically connected to my human body. I think there is something to be said about "vibrational attractions" on a quantum scale, but there is little to no evidence to say conclusively whether that can then effect such things as "thought attraction."

    However, I think there is something fantastic about the nature of perceived coincidences. Just this last week I let myself lose total control of my emotions in a fit of rage... a couple days later something terrible happened to a portion of my property that I now have to deal with. Further back, I really let myself slip into a very unproductive, self-defeating experience of pornographic obsessions... the next day, I encountered an odd situation that made me feel sexually uncomfortable. Little things like that happen quite often.

    I think a "law of attraction" exists on some physical level, but the best you can do with such a concept is to focus on what you want in your life, do not let distractions or destructive behavior interfere with your drive to achieve success, and always allow yourself to be grateful for your blessings -- and to be humble when situations turn out worse than you expected. This is simple self-help advice that I think can be corrupted to fit a narrative, but that is in itself beneficial to human productivity. Those are my two cents.
     

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