THE LACK OF A GIRLFRIEND IS WHY IM ADDICTED TO PORN AND MASTURBATION

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by LonerWolf, Jan 31, 2019.

  1. motion2082

    motion2082 Fapstronaut

    109
    90
    28
    Well said, life is pretty boring.
     
    DekuHope and 4DCreator like this.
  2. It's how I gained 12 Kg too. Lots of nuts. I was 67 ,now I'm around 79. Walnuts + peanuts , each and every day.

    And btw you made me remember this.

    I hope I wont get banned for it lol.
     
    ReclaimedLife likes this.
  3. ReclaimedLife

    ReclaimedLife Fapstronaut

    429
    611
    93
    MY NUTS:emoji_laughing::emoji_joy::emoji_joy::emoji_joy::emoji_joy:
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  4. Jackb97

    Jackb97 Fapstronaut

    187
    387
    63
    Well we solved that riddle.
     
    GigglingTrout likes this.
  5. true. i began fapping at the age of 20 becuase I couldnt get laid. desperation destroys the man.
     
  6. EvgenNii

    EvgenNii Fapstronaut

    Have the same struggle with this one missing girl in ma life and this is why porn is shit (it does u think u have a harem), it make most of us shy. I do not look bad, I look good but because I was shy and now still a bit shy I had no chance by good looking girls, because they want alphas also most of them
     
  7. elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

    916
    4,013
    123
    This is like saying because I lack a muscular body I'm addicted to junk food and binge watching television.

    You lack a girlfriend because you're not dealing with the problem. You're not putting yourself out there, making mistakes, learning, meeting new people, contributing in communities, trying new things, exploring interests, failing, developing skills, getting rejected, etc. You're not willing to face the awkward, messy, unideal, uncomfortable, and uncertain reality. You're not willing to deal with short term pain to attain long term achievements. You value protecting your fragile emotions over developing some real in your life.

    Porn is all about easy, guaranteed, and certain instant gratification. It's mediocre, passive, comfortable, and lazy. It doesn't require any risks. There's no immediate possibility of pain, problems, and negative experiences (until your life is ruined in the long run).

    So... no. It's not the lack of a girlfriend. It's your choice to escape your problems to make yourself feel good in the moment while sacrificing the development of your reality. It's your own fault. People who can't admit that and take responsibility won't get very far in life. Instead they will blame this, that, and everything other than themselves for why their life turned to shit.
     
    alfianlight, Xander_, Jal Say and 2 others like this.
  8. BravelyKegger

    BravelyKegger Fapstronaut

    1,268
    1,713
    143
    Honestly i used to feel the same way, but than i realized i pmo because i am unhappy with life, and when i started bettering myself i stopped needing those things, even my strong desire for a gf went away, if you love life and you are honest with yourself, you wont need to make excuses i think.
     
    alfianlight, Kman20 and Mordobarn like this.
  9. prettyboichad

    prettyboichad Fapstronaut

    246
    11,558
    123
    My Journal
  10. Nayah

    Nayah New Fapstronaut

    3
    2
    3
    As true as it feels to you this is not always the case. I was in a long term relationship with a man who was addicted to P and M before we met. He did stop for awhile but the M never slowed down. He maintained 3-5 times a day M. Soon this led to relapsing on P and hiding it from me for years. He ended up damaging our relationship by all the distance, lies, and deception he used to hide it.

    I have felt so unattractive emotionally distant that I also started to use P and M. Mostly from lack of real experience, lack of self image, and too much loyalty to cheat on him. As the partner of someone who used this exact mentality I will tell you...my presence did not help his addiction. On top of that what his addiction did to my self worth was horrifying.

    Put simply, you need to work on you before you can truly work together with a partner. If you don't you could continue perpetuating your problem and seriously hurt the other person.
     
    lackingabettername and Mordobarn like this.
  11. Jal Say

    Jal Say Fapstronaut

    24
    275
    48
    First, thumb up for the cold shower and living vegan, Just realize that you do mother nature a great favor, so give AND receive gratitude.

    Yes, I feel ya as I have sort of the same problem, but our views are different.

    The thing different between you and someone who has what you want to have is that

    1. His thoughts & mindset are optimized for what he wants in his life, (Like being maskulin, attractive to woman, speaking to strangers)
    Affirmationen are great to change your beliefs and also thinking about the reason you have them.

    2. He takes action

    3. He is aware that he already has it.
    It's just another thought, like your picture about yourself.

    What I can recommend is that you try to see life playful, seeing it as some kind of game, other people are your felllw players and your skills get experience ever time you make use of them.
    Most are obvious to the fact that only THEY themself are the player of their life.
    They feel like the victim, not the cause which is fundamentally wrong.

    Like if you speak to a stranger your social skill increases. Because life is just like that, it's a big game and we can change our character the way we want.

    Also, be just you and do not, in any ways, mask yourself with something you are not. While the quote "Fake it till you make it" is in some scenarios true, its definitly not while making friends or having conversation with other people.
    Talk about what you like and sooner or later people with the same thoughts will keep you company.

    Love for yourself is a key skill, a great practice is looking in the mirror and to say "I love you/myself". At the beginning it may feel akward but it will increase your skill, if you do it consistently.

    I also recommend the Spiritual teachers and philosophs Alan Watts & Eckhart Tolle, the teaching of them both has helped me a lot.
    Especially Eckharts Book "The Power of Now" helped thousend to millions of people.

    Satisfaction is a huge topic too, do you have goals? A purpose? Steps defined to reach your Goals?
    In being present can also be found huge satisfaction, as you don't think all the time about useless and harming thoughts.

    Hope that I could provide useful information, truly helping you can only yourself do.
     
    Last edited: Mar 24, 2019
  12. Ra's Al Ghul

    Ra's Al Ghul Temporarily Suspended

    1,009
    1,920
    143
    Reclaim your Manhood and drop the Vegan meme, it is not good for you at all.
     
  13. DekuHope

    DekuHope Fapstronaut

    I really like the way you are speaking and thinking. It remind me of myself :D I am such a cool guy.... No but for real we are really similar in some aspects.
     
  14. Jal Say

    Jal Say Fapstronaut

    24
    275
    48

    First : Great that you decided to go vegan for 6 months.
    Second : The most important thing is to inform yourself and than stop worry because there is no reason to if you eat whole plant based. Vitamin D is smth that everyone has problems with, if they do not live in sunny countrys like Jamaika.
    Third: I recommend to take Vitamin B12 to everyone, animals before slaugthered too get vitamin supplements so that the Industry can say that its rich of vitamins.
    Forth: Dairy has a lot of estrogen which fucks with your body, soy protects your body to too much estrogen. Also, fking oat"milk" is so delicious in comparison to dairy. Or even coconut, almond or hazelnut "milk"
    Fifth: you're right it is disgusting how they treat the animals but where is the difference between a cow and chicken/fish? Right. There is none.

    Everyone : Living vegan is truly no problem and great for health both mental and physical but please do the work and research like 1 hour on how to do it right. It does not need longer than one hour learning. Or just download Dr. michael gregers Daily dozen app and eat what he recommends. Just eat it and feel for yourself. If you have some problems, than please use the internet, there are tons of videos to tons of questions/ problems.
     
  15. Xander_

    Xander_ Distinguished Fapstronaut

    264
    311
    63
    I see that as nothing else, but more reasons for you to quit porn ....

    I can't give you as many tips as many guys did here, all i do know is if you pity yourself, you'll get nowhere. Get serious, you have reasons to quit, its all up to you.
     
  16. Korra

    Korra Fapstronaut

    16
    25
    13
    PMO because of being single may be true but not always true. I remember thinking like that. After being in a relationship the problem still continued. And I fear the problem can persist even after marriage
     
    alfianlight likes this.
  17. Burning star

    Burning star New Fapstronaut

    2
    2
    3
    Here’s the thing - fuck everything, fuck what others think about me, I’m skinny fat or belly fat, fuck every opinion which makes me feel bad, we are all going to die anyway, with athletic bodys or fat bodys, tough guy personalities or shy kid personalities, just work for what you want to change, is it your body or mentally, doesn’t matter, just work hard, suffer and chase your dream, don’t be lazy comfort guy who allways crys coz of his life. If you want something just do it anyway. Quit porn, masturbation and even thinking about girls. masturbation drains your motivation, energy, confidence and even physical functions, it kills everything which makes us live a life. Change your life step by step, start learning martial arts or just a fitness gym or whatever you want to do, just leave your comfort zone, remember, a calm sea doesn’t make a skilled sailor, you should realize that, you should willing to die for your dream and do not masturbate anymore, when you’re about to quit and relapse remember why you started
     
    onmonkmode likes this.
  18. onmonkmode

    onmonkmode New Fapstronaut

    2
    9
    3
    Hi bro, that is just your starting point. There is an upside to being shy and lightweight. You can change slowly. When you kick PMO and start to feel more confident, the good habits you make will last a lifetime. Keep all the sensitivity and softness (inside) and build up the willpower to be a stand up guy. I can be done. You are on the way. Get an accountability partner!
     
  19. Curiosity31

    Curiosity31 Fapstronaut

    19
    19
    3
    Bri
    Brilliant!.""....is like taking pain killers while you have an arrow in your leg...lol...I luv that.
    And also equating porn&fapping with drugs...fantastic! Thanks man.
     
  20. Mordobarn

    Mordobarn Fapstronaut

    Well, it does pretty much the same thing to your brain as taking heroin, alcohol, cigarettes, or any other recreational drug. The biological details, of course, differ. The good news is that porn & masturbation doesn't damage your other organs as do drugs, so it's easier to stop and quicker to recover.

    The only things that make it hard are the initial dopamine recovery in the first few months while your brain is restoring its neurons, and the false belief that porn & masturbation make things better. That's also true of recreational drugs, but drugs come with extra physical problems.
     
    alfianlight likes this.

Share This Page