The Final Breakthrough

About me - I am a 19 yo boy from INDIA and i have been trying to get clean from the past 3~4 years and i have failed miserably.I have suffered a lot due to masturbation and i am still suffering the consequences ( i will discuss in detail below ). I found Nofap many years ago and due to repeated cycles of failing and coming back and creating multiple accounts , I left Nofap thinking that i will try the whole thing myself but now i am back again with my new account . I have managed to get 14 days streak but never went past that number.

My Goal - I will be sharing my past experiences and will give my best shot to complete the 90 days challenge and i will also be posting my daily updates to maintain a record and take daily advice from the nofap family along with loads of motivation to achieve my final BREAKTHROUGH.

My Sufferings from past and present - I found porn when i was a small kid. I found a video hidden in a games folder in a cd which was given to me by my friend's elder brother.I never knew that this would bring me to such a position where i stand today.I have what all kids of my age desire but i dont have what everyone has.

I have a natural behaviour of impulsiveness from childhood.I dont have a middle path for any bit of my life.If i am playing game , then i will play it for straight 8 hours otherwise i will delete it.If i am fapping , then i will go beyond 6+ times a day or i will go for nofap.This hyper behaviour is the reason i am fat and out of shape ( 6ft 1inch and i weigh 115 kgs ).The problem with hyper behaviour is that it is so extreme that you can never achieve consistency and ultimately your life becomes unstable just like a see-saw.

1. I have no friends in my college because i am not social at all.

2. I have no girl in my life.

3. I have no desire at all to achieve anything.

4. I have no willpower to do any task and i generally spend most of my day sleeping, eating and browsing internet.

5. I have lost my capability of focusing.

6. I feel disconnected from the outside world.

7. i suffer from tight foreskin of penis.

8. I have anal fissures due to obesity.

9. I have everything in my life which many kids of my age cannot even imagine of - a brilliant new car , branded outfit , loving and caring parents , branded shoes and what not. but when i see everyone laughing and enjoying while i am sitting alone in a corner of class , i feel very bad.

10. I have a gym membership but i go only 2-3 days a week because i have low energy levels.I hate this fact so much because deep inside i love gym a lot.

11. I can go on and on with all my sufferings and problems but i won't because the above 10 points provide major information and test after not as important as the above mentioned points.

My Past Experiences and Observations-

1. being busy and not ovrthinking is the best method for nofap.

2. proper mindset is must before starting with nofap.everyone should have the reason clear in their mind (" why "). This comes in handy during hardtimes.

3. overconfidence and edging kills.

4. always go to bed only for sleeping.

5. small rewards are important.

6. motivation needs to be replaced by discipline at the correct time because willpower will replenish over time.

7. eating heavy food is bad because the spices lead to increased blood pressure which leads to impulsive behaviour.

8. EXERCISE , MEDITATION AND COLD BATH are the most important keys to secure your win.

9. Avoid any kind of negativity because it messes up the dopamine level.

Final word - I will go for 90 days challenge and i will also try to hit gym everyday and wil be sharing gym pics daily to be in touch with all of you guys and to maintain my record.If i succeed in 90 days challenge , i will post my original before and after photo. I will need each of your guys support to achieve my goal so all suggestions,advice,motivation and help are welcome.Let's do this !!!!!

 

31 january 2019

I have low energy levels still i managed to hit the gym today in early morning.I am feeling quite motivated.

 

1 Feb 2019

Today i went to gym and hit a high intensity workout.I felt great after gym and i did eat healthy meal.Unlike yesterday , i felt no urges today.Overall it was a good day.

someone please suggest me the best method to upload photos of my workout.

 

its indeed the truth and a very good explanation.I missed gym today because the weather was too foggy to drive to gym and now i am feeling very uncomfortable due to excess energy.I thought it would be better to go through forums before my mind wanders to wrong place .thankyou brother for your advice.

 

2 Feb 2019

Today I did'nt go to gym due to very foggy weather in early morning as it was not safe to drive.I am feeling excess energy in my body and i will surely work on advice given by brother which you can see above this post.I will try to work out each and every day.Yesterday i gave it all in the gym so that no energy is left in my body and i felt great after working out like a maniac.I could not post photos because they were too large.It was 500 cal burned in 30 mins preworkout and 300 cal burned in 20 mins post workout.

 

3 Feb 2019

Today i went to the gym despite foggy weather.I was the only member today.I did only cardio and first time ever i burned 1000 calories.I did 880 in 1 hour and then treadmill stopped for cooldown.afterwards i did 120 cal in 8 mins.
altogether it was 1000 carbs in 1 hr 8 mins.

it is sunday today so i slept after returning to home.I am feeling some urges today but i have managed to supress them.I think that i have to quit instagram to save my streak.

One thing that i have noticed is that very few people comment in this reboot section and more are interested in success stories forum.anyways , maybe after 30 days my new thread will be in success stories section .Till then , I will try my best to maintain my focus.

 

4 feburary 2019

Today was a very sad day for me.I could not go to gym and i lost my most beloved earphones somewhere in college.They were quite costly and also new , I am feeling very bad because i cannot literally live without music and my parents won't buy me another pair.I am really low on dopamine level due to sadness and guilt.let's see how it goes.

 

6 feb 2019

sorry i could not post yesterday because i was very busy and i forgot.today i didn't feel any urges till now.I did go to the gym and did HIIT.yesterday was also the same.i have started healthy eating today because i am not getting the results i want.let's see how everything goes.

 

7 feb 2019

Today i failed after 7 days of streak.I woke up early morning at 2.30 am to go to toilet and accidentaly dropped my phone in tub.I was in a half awoke half asleep state so i could not understand exactly what to do.I did a quick google and i soaked my phone in rice.When i woke up i checked my phone and it was not working.I became very depressed.It was raining very heavily so i did not go to gym and college.My phone is quite costly so i knew it would cost me a good amount to get it repaired.I spent good amount in repairing it.After loosing money twice in a week due to my silly mistakes and ignorance , i failed to hold my emotions and dopamine levels went too low.My body only knew one thing to make me happy , and after edging , i relapsed.

these were the last words which i ever wanted to write on this thread and i really feel void and depressed.

But i wont quit like last times and i will start with a fresh streak from tommorow.I will be posting updates week wise because everday is approximately the same for me.

yes i fucked up but i will get up strong.Its my promise that i will win.

 

Its half an hour left for next day to start here in India and trust me bro this is the first positive thing which made me happy this entire day.I messed up very badly and opened my thread to sharw my feelings.I knew it would take time to gain my motivation again but your words have motivated me literally in a second.

Thanks for being my partner.tommorow will again be my day 1 and we will win together.do share your streak details so we can see how well we go.

 

i have heard about water intake a lot but never really tried it.I will make sure from now on that i consume more water.your support is really much needed at this time because i failed today on day 7.thanks bro for coming here.I will restart again from tommorow.