Struggling Beginner

Hello everyone. I am trying to do nofap since 9 months. The max i have got to is 55 days. In this 9 months i have read about PMO on forums websites videos as much as i could to understand it. I have tracked down the reasons of my PMO addiction and why i want to quit it.

In all my nofap attempts i cheated many times like watched porn, edged, fantasized,peaking,staring below eyes.

Believe me i have learned so many things about relapse. Its like on every relapse you learn a new reason for your fapping.

This time i have gone straight for 2 weeks with PMO and no fantasizing peeking staring anything.

First week was energetic. Will to do things, achieve something were high. At the end of
2nd week its only sadness i feel. My flatline started. Dont feel like doing anything. Dont feel like talking to anyone, no interest in girls. I feel like just lying on my bed, eat something and do nothing. But this time i have knowledge about why relapses happen and techniques to deal with it.

My goal here is to come out of this PMO cycle and be awesome again. The day i do that is when i will share more about myself and i will make posts in many parts to cover every aspect of PMO to help others because i know guys how much life sucks in this PMO cycle. So my main reason to do it is to help others.

I see guys out there who suck just because of this habit. The typical nice guys who have have fake behaviour. I feel sad for them and for myself. I want to help out seriously. But to help others i have to help myself. First i will conquer my demon and help others. My ultimate goal.
Thankyou.