Stop liking girls very quickly

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by PMS, Jun 4, 2019.

  1. PMS

    PMS Fapstronaut

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    Does anyone else struggle with this. I start dating a girl. Then suddenly after a couple of weeks I just am not that interested any more. All their annoying qualities come out and I realize that we don't have that much in common.

    Any thoughts on this?
     
  2. Awedouble

    Awedouble Fapstronaut

    From a mental health perspective, that could just as well describe our relationship with life itself sometimes - you know? But we gotta live with that one. It may actually be a good sign that you're being more honest with yourself. But as far as relationship with life it makes me think of this, if we could celebrate life with its "bitchiness...":

     
  3. PMS

    PMS Fapstronaut

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    I see what you mean. And yes. I do think that I don't settle for people that I'm not in love with is a sign of maturity. But why am I then fooled to believe that I like them so much going in to it. I'm starting to understand why people hold back so much in relationships and "take it slow".
     
  4. Awedouble

    Awedouble Fapstronaut

    I think it's hard in todays world to meet people in a context where we actually see them for who they really are, it's a big deal when those telling moments happen. A lot of communication is on a superficial level and more of the more shallow does not add up to a deeper seeing - and that goes for both ourselves and others. So in terms of being fooled to believe we like them, I think it's good to recognize there's this kind of context in the beginning. There may be some places where it's more likely to meet - or have a meeting that is deeper but there's no guarantee those turn into anything relationship wise. I just don't seed some kind of soulmate speed dating. No matter how good someone is at marketing it and how ready to believe the people are I think on some level people know that's just not realistic.
     
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  5. PMS

    PMS Fapstronaut

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    Yeah I agree with this. Especially with things like tinder. Before internet dating you actually had to meet a person, maybe in the workplace, or at a party, possibly several times before you actually started getting romantic. So you would have a better grasp on who they are than we do with tinder.
    Yeah, that seems like it would be kind of a silly concept. But I guess you could make a speed-dating service that encouraged a deeper exchange of ideas or something of that nature. Perhaps make a tinder that makes the chat entirely about existential topics. "Trippy dating" or something :D
     
  6. Awedouble

    Awedouble Fapstronaut

    .. you know truth or dare comes to mind, and of course lots of times it's easier to dare. Self disclosure of personal psychological stuff is probably harder than getting physically nakked.
     
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  7. PMS

    PMS Fapstronaut

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    I think you hit the nail on the head with that one.
     

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