Soon to hit 90 days for the second time

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by Milkyway, Mar 17, 2019.

  1. Milkyway

    Milkyway Fapstronaut

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    Dear fellow nofappers,
    It has been years since I have visited this site. I just came here now, thinking I should be proud of my achievement - I am soon to reach 90 days of no pmo and it feels good. This is not the first time though. Back in 2015, I went 7 months without porn, only to give in when I was in a long distance relationship feeling horny, lonely and weak.
    I gave in, and surely I started to care less about it, giving in time after time, until I was back at a weekly/monthly binge habit. It ended up destroying my relationship of 4 years, as it drove me to infidelity, and carelessness. My girlfriend still wanted me, but I fell in love with a younger woman, who I now call my girlfriend. She is great, and since we’ve been together, I am determined to not let porn ruin my love- and sexlife once again.

    I feel different now, and it’s harder to recognize the benefits of NoFap. That being said, I know they are there, deep and subtle. Women love me, and I love women, maybe because I’m no longer sexualizing everyone of them as soon as I lay my eyes on them.

    I realize I might be in the state we call the flatline, and that the winter has taken it’s toll on me, but I’m more determined then ever to shut the door for porn once and for all. I don’t think about it as much as I used to, but I still get the urge, and I sometimes miss the sweet pleasure of jerking off to porn.

    Proud to say I’m about to reach 90 days, and that my sexlife is more and more becoming like the sexlife I’ve always imagined.
     
  2. 220woof671

    220woof671 Fapstronaut

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    Congratulations on 80 days.

    Perhaps you two can get married and become Exclusive?
     
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  3. Milkyway

    Milkyway Fapstronaut

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    I think that lies in the future, Yes :)
    Thank you doggo
     
  4. luke132

    luke132 Fapstronaut

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    Did you stop masturbation both times as well? Wondering what your thoughts on this is.
     
    Milkyway likes this.
  5. SuperiorMan95

    SuperiorMan95 Fapstronaut

    That is awesome man. That's very motivating.

    "Motivation isn't about being all fired up. It's about having a motive." - Jocko
     
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  6. 28yrsold

    28yrsold Fapstronaut

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    Congratulations , and stay strong.
     
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  7. Milkyway

    Milkyway Fapstronaut

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    Great question!

    I did not stop masturbation completely, but I have stopped masturbating to orgasm, as this feels like a waste of good semen. This is probably easier for me as I have regular sex with a partner, but it is also proven scientifically that ejaculation from lone masturbation is not as emotionally fulfilling as ejaculation from sex (sorry, no source available). That being said, I dont think masturbating is good for your relationship with women, even if you don´t ejaculate.

    I do PE (mattersofsize.com, pegym.com, etc.) and this is even more motivating now, as my erection quality is better. PE is great, but I do not recommend doing this if it is your first time quitting porn. The reason: PE makes porn and masturbation very very tempting, and can also set you back if you overdo it.
     
  8. Milkyway

    Milkyway Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for all the motivating words, people! I am still on track, and I´m here again today, because I was feeling tempted again. Glad to have this thread to keep me on track, and proud to say my relationship is still as good as ever!
     
    SirErnest likes this.
  9. Targaryenn

    Targaryenn Fapstronaut

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    You can tell us please, how do you fight to overcome urges?
    And another questions: after how many days we can control easily the desire to watch p and m? After 30 days?!
    Thanks!

    P.S. Congratulations!
     
    Last edited: Jun 5, 2019
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  10. Milkyway

    Milkyway Fapstronaut

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    First off, it is vital to believe (to actually believe!) that by abstaining, you will achieve a greater feeling of fulfillment in life. That is because you will have self integrity, you will have more time during your day, and you will be feeling more (both the ups and downs) of life. This makes you more true to yourself, as you have decided to go for this, and quit porn. It is always important for your self worth, to try your best to achieve your goals.

    These ideas help me to stay strong and to shift my focus elsewhere.

    Some simple techniques:

    1. Use the S.O.A.L. method

    Stop
    Observe
    Accept
    Let go

    This will not always be easy, but to let go, and forgive yourself is important.

    2. Distract yourself!
    Simply do something else...
    Take a cold shover
    Go for a walk and look at people or nature.
    Create some music
    Make a drawing
    Call your mother, father, brother or sister, if you have any.
    Call a friend, play some cards, chess or dominos.

    ANYTHING that gets you away from being alone with your thoughts, WILL HELP YOU GET AWAY FROM YOUR URGES

    Try this and please let me know if it helps you!

    Stay strong, my friend!
     
    Targaryenn likes this.
  11. Milkyway

    Milkyway Fapstronaut

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    As for how much time you need, it will vary from person to person. Only you know yourself. And this is also what NoFap is about: Getting to know yourself! Porn keeps you distracted from feeling your real feelings about whatever goes on in your life. Feelings are important to know if what you are doing is right or wrong, related to your core values.
     
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  12. Targaryenn

    Targaryenn Fapstronaut

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    Great advices. Thank you very much!
     
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