Should I talk to real people in my life about this?

Hey mate,
I think you should share to the one whom understand you without judging.
Sharing a problem/pain lessen your burden & make a bond very strong.
Stay clean.
Peace.

 

You should definitely find a few close people in your real life to share this with. The NoFap community is great, but we're also virtual strangers to you. We never see you in person. It's virtually impossible for us to hold you accountable, or to really see how you're doing on a day-to-day basis. When you can share your struggle with a close friend, and you realize that they don't run away screaming--that can go a long way toward reducing any shame you're carrying. You stop feeling the need to live a double-life. You'll want to be very selective about who gets the privilege of knowing this very personal aspect of your life, but yes, I think it's very important that you share it with at least a few people.

I agree with @The Peace Warrior. You should definitely share it with your wife. She might be hurt, but she will be thankful for your honesty. I've been in SAA and gotten to know dozens and dozens of men who struggle with this addiction--and 100%, literally every single one--said their wives were more hurt by the secrecy and lying than by the porn or sexual behavior, and that's certainly consistent with my ex-wife and I.

 

Exactly, I meant a friend but here I see now(from your comment), you've already a close friend whom you can share everything but if you can share with your wife then it'll be good for your relationship. Friend can help you how to say or may be they can create an opportunity to open with your wife. Your wife might get hurt by hearing the truth so just find a good opportunity to say everything openly.

Your wife is the person whom you're/you'll live till the end of your life so it's better to be transparent with your partner than end up with regrettable situation. Be honest in your relationship & you'll feel no weight/burden from inside.
Good luck bud.

 

You should look at the reboot of the addiction like any other addiction/problem. Let's say you're obese, do you think people are going to judge you negatively if you say that you are going to start working out? No. Some might, and those people are often the ones that you don't want in your life.
If you tell someone, it is a very good thing to use this technique (to make connections to other problems/addictions like obesity and alcohol abuse). Also, explain what'll happen if you make it through, how you will change and more importantly - that you need their help. I've told a few persons in my life about this, and they said that they felt honoured to help.
Btw, I'm sorry for my poor writing, but I hope you got the point, good luck!

 

Exactly. Sex Addicts Anonymous. You can go to their website at saa-recovery.org. Just go to the "meetings" tab to see if there are any meetings in your area. I can't recommend them enough. Now, the guys in that program have probably gotten into behaviors that are far beyond porn. It isn't uncommon to come across people who've been arrested or who have HIV as a result of their addiction. But what they all have in common, 100%, is a pattern of habitual porn use in their past. It's one place where you can go where literally everyone in the room will be able to relate to what you're dealing with.

In those meetings, you'll discover that you have the freedom and security to share further details about your porn addiction. Your wife and friends, for instance, might not need to know what kind of porn you've been watching, but that's something you can express in an SAA meeting. Basically, it's all about sharing your experiences with real, flesh-and-blood people to help reduce the shame and find mutual encouragement to stay on track with recovery.

 

I've been struggling with letting someone in also.
Culture is an important consideration. in some cultures its quite difficult to come out openly. the person who you tell is already harsh on you to begin with and they have no clue about the addiction. there's something about being needy that your dignity refuses to accept opening up. one reason is the possibility of your needs being shamed, n you'll be seen as someone who is not in control of his affairs.
I'd like to know anybody who has opened up despite such fears.