Good question. It feels like a horribly unfair burden. Because we should have been a team. I *thought* we were a team. I was in it for life. But I also feel like for 10 years he decided to *not* be in the marriage-so to me he already made his choice. I just hate feeling like I am #1000 on his list of beautiful women. It's not right. It also feels incredibly frightening because I never thought of life without him. Never. I was 100% commited. But now a potential new reality is in front if me and I feel frightened and unprepared. Alone.