relax. no-one cares.

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Thechosenone, Jan 21, 2016.

  1. Thechosenone

    Thechosenone Fapstronaut

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    No one cares how you sit on the train. No one cares what you do with your hands. No one cares where you look (unless its at them). No one cares what clothes you wear. No one cares if your hair is slightly out of place. No one cares. Stop fooling yourself. The world doesn't revolve around you. Nobody cares if you let yourself relax.

    If they do care about these than they're idiots. They don't have anything else to worry about. You are not royalty. Nobody cares that you do nofap. It's for you. Stop thinking that you matter. Nobody cares. They have thier lives to attend to. Let yourself loose. Stop being so tense. Nobody cares. You're free.

    Only YOU should care about how you feel. For yourself.
     
    Last edited: Jan 21, 2016
    Low, Brasileiro, volt2187 and 5 others like this.
  2. Merlionno

    Merlionno Guest

    Great post !
     
  3. Ser_G

    Ser_G Fapstronaut

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    *Nofap de-intensifies*
     
  4. Thechosenone

    Thechosenone Fapstronaut

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    @Ser_G Nobody cares if you're a millionaire. All they care about is getting free shit if you are. People care if you do nofap if it benefits them. We do this to fix the health related problems that come with too much fapping to porn. All that bullsh*t about superpowers is stupid. It doesn't mean nofap is invalid. Nofap is critical for us to restore our health. That's it. To stop further damage. When you realise this you will be free. Your expectations will drop ...then things actually start.
     
    Ultra Zork likes this.
  5. numpty

    numpty Fapstronaut

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    You should conclude that by saying

    "only YOU should care"

    And that's only if it is really YOU caring....

    Many people think "i wonder if my hair looks weird" - they mean "i wonder if people will think my hair looks weird" .

    Alot of people have lost the ability to think for themselves but rather claim they do but in reality they dont and instead think what others have to say about them
     
    Kenzo89 and Thechosenone like this.
  6. DannyCool

    DannyCool Fapstronaut

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    You don't gain that much from NoFap things don't change that much but we do become more relaxed and confident. I definitely don't want a NoFap t-shirt so I can say Im important. :p
     
    Thechosenone likes this.
  7. Ser_G

    Ser_G Fapstronaut

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    Word. The real changes are made mentally. Look at guys like Gabe everyone. What stood out to me is he made the choice that pmo was no longer part of his life. He didn't quit expecting to receive some sort of amazing powers just by quitting. He wanted to be normal again. Truly normal. And he's stuck to his guns. Do the same. The "superpowers" are temporary. Mine have faded. BUT I'm finally starting to feel normal again. Life is gonna be ups and downs. But it's how we choose to deal with them is what separates the men from the boys. Don't do nofap thinking things are gonna get magically better for you in life from simply quitting. You have to change your outlook on life. That's where the real victory is won. Otherwise as soon as shit hits the fan irl, you'll easily slide back into your old PMO ways. Because it's what you've known for so long, it's the thing that made the pain go away. Learn to handle the pain. Walk through it. Man up. Overcome ypur demons that made you choose PMO in the first place. Then, and only then, will you truly be who you were made to be. I dont care if it's seeking counselling or closure from past harms. Do it. You think quitting pmo is the hard part? God no! I've started counselling for some deep dark crap in my past, learning how to deal with and move past those issues. And believe me, THIS is HARD! Quitting PMO has been a cakewalk compared to this. But oh, how I long for the freedom this will bring. So you are damn right I'm gonna take these demons on. And, as a Christian, I know that The Lord is with me, and will be beside me as I struggle through this next while.

    My mind is made: I will not go back. That old life is gone. The new is come. With all the glorious pain and suffering. It's my battle. Only mine. Just as your battle is yours. So FIGHT! Fight the real disease, the things that made you sink into PMO in the first place. Kill the sickness along with the symptoms. I know every last one of you can do it if you really, truly are willing to choose "No More" and wrestle through. It will be without a doubt be one of the hardest things you will ever do. But it will be one of the greatest victories you will ever achieve.

    Sorry for the thread hijacking thechosenone, this all sorta just spilled out. Thanks for being boss enough to make this topic in the first place. I think it's something we all needed to see.
     
  8. DannyCool

    DannyCool Fapstronaut

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    It is often at the back of my head to go back to the way things were that I can gain these powers so that I can get what I want in a new way but alas that is not what it is about. Maybe I could get three blondes if I do NoFap that will love me for me. Maybe I could get rich and go on a world tour where everything goes according to plan on a nice cruise. Maybe I would find the ideal wife who would be the perfect companion and not push my buttons. I can get this from NoFap. I can love better and get better. What about that magic sex I have always dreamed about. NoFap can get me that too. It is often in my head that I could go back to the way things were when I fell in love with different women. These were all the same aims when I was younger and I want to repeat them again 20 years later even though they did not work out.

    NO THIS IS NOT what NoFap is about. It is about what the men are taking about above.
     
  9. DannyCool

    DannyCool Fapstronaut

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    This is what NoFap is about not what DannyCool was saying!!! :p
     
  10. Thechosenone

    Thechosenone Fapstronaut

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    Nofap does nothing other than stop yourself from harming yourself further
     
  11. Thechosenone

    Thechosenone Fapstronaut

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    It's cool. Nofap intrinsically does nothing. It's the ceasing of an act to help up heal from health problems created by using too much porn or fapping too much. That's it. It will take time to even reach this mindset. Then move on and live life normally from it.

    This nofap journey is a struggle to regain consciousness and control over our destructive habit. Once we have healed that's it. Life goes on.
    When we feel comfortable again after quitting porn and masturbation. When we can relax calmly and not feel negative effects of it, we've healed. Then life really begins.
     
  12. DannyCool

    DannyCool Fapstronaut

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    Yes NoFap is very good at reducing harm, avoiding more harm, helping to appreciate what other people do and just not being so self conscious. I mean just do good things other people don't deserve to be harmed. Your not going to get stars on a star chart for doing it and in fact you might get the opposite but who cares if someone shouts at you for no reason or back answers you. I don't have to be self conscious and so sensitive. I am not important and I am only going to mess up their day and mine. This is not even mentioning my secret motivation of wanting to be with women primarily for pleasure and fulfilment.
     
    Thechosenone likes this.
  13. DannyCool

    DannyCool Fapstronaut

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    Yes. We are not creating benefit by doing NoFap we are just removing the harm in us. That does not make us more important than anyone else in fact it should help us to see how it is important to recognise the people around us like loving women in a way that does not objectify them but gives them their breathing space with no pressure.
     
    Thechosenone likes this.
  14. DannyCool

    DannyCool Fapstronaut

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    Who Let the Dogs Out? Woof Woof Woof!!!
     
  15. Thechosenone

    Thechosenone Fapstronaut

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    Lust for women has caused this problem. Is lusting after women once were healed going to help? Unlikely. Move on, when the time is right well meet a good woman, no woman no cry! Don't do this for women they don't care. You tell a girl you don't masturbate and they won't give u fvcks. But they will want you to spill your seed for them, they love that. For instance in my fapping days, I had a girl whod sex chat me and only I got rid of my precious seed she would b happy. Shed be insulted if I didn't. So women want your seed. The more you hold it the more powerful you become. Period.

     
    Low and DannyCool like this.
  16. DannyCool

    DannyCool Fapstronaut

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    The truth.
     
    Thechosenone likes this.
  17. Chef Boy

    Chef Boy Fapstronaut

    I am not a fan of "real talk" topics like this that all but burst many of our hopes in one swift motion. I have relapsed many times after reading long-term abstainers belittling their own accomplishments and ridiculing any perceived benefits as bullshit. It's not helpful and you may think that you're opening the eyes of readers but you're probably crushing their resolve, inadvertently of course.

    Anyway, to give my two cents, I believe that fapping prevents us becoming the best versions of ourselves and that "superpowers" are a label for people realising their true selves and removing that layer of anxiety/low self-esteem/lethargy that masturbation causes. To this point, I believe compulsive masturbation is the real issue.
     
  18. DannyCool

    DannyCool Fapstronaut

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    Check out the latest success story and see how it changed his life just by removing the harm of PMO and taking a proactive approach which kinda comes naturally when you retain semen.
     
  19. DannyCool

    DannyCool Fapstronaut

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    What is being said is that if you have expectations you will most likely be disappointed but you will be so so so so so so much more happy and content.
     
  20. Thechosenone

    Thechosenone Fapstronaut

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    Abstaining requires a lot of conviction and determination. But I think the bad effects we feel as a consequence of fapping too much are a sign that we should stop lusting so much. It causes damage.

    Being free from fapping is phenomenal. This crutch is one of the hardest ones to beat. I think it's incredibly liberating to realise that nobody really cares about the small things we think they care about. It sets us up to be free. Of course people do care on some level

    It's tricky because weaved deeply in the harsh truth is the very benefit we acclaim to gain while on nofap. It's a paradox.

    It's like fight club, the harder you get hit beaten up punched, the more resilient you become, the more wise you become about your problems. Which then liberates you. It puts other problems like social anxiety into perspective.

    I'm sorry I don't want to encourage anyone to fap. I apologize if this post was insensitive. You're overcoming your hurdles, setting yourself up for victory with every streak. The more you get fed up the more likely you're going to want to stop it. You're building potential. It sucks more and more because you're forming a new opinion about fapping.

    You're right where you need to be right now. If you want help please don't hesitate to pm me man

     

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