Recovery through abstinence vs sobriety, and why you will fail at NoFap

I just finished In The Realm of Hungry Ghosts by Dr Gabor Mate yesterday, a fantastic book about addiction, I'd highly recommend it.

The reason I believe that the 90 day NoFap challenge does not work for most is because it does not take the addiction seriously enough. Not to mention that merely abstaining for 90 days leaves the possibility of relapse open, what happens after the 90 days? You just gonna go back to the addiction?

Addiction is a SERIOUS issue.. if you continue to relapse, then guess what, you need help. Their is an underlying root cause of your addiction, whether it is childhood trauma, sexual abuse, unresolved anxiety and/ or depression, ADHD issues or otherwise. There is a reason you became addicted to porn. Don't kid yourself, if access to porn caused your addiction then nearly 100% of all youth growing up today would be severely addicted since it is more abundant and easier to access then ever before.

Abstinence implies resistance to fully quitting the addictive behavior or substance use. Simply abstaining for 90 days or even a year is not legitimate recovery. Unless you deal with the cause of the addiction, it'll always haunt you.

Sobriety implies choice... you are choosing a new life. This is why you must focus your energy on creating a new life, gym, reading, work, meditation, volunteer, social activities, do therapy and go to AA meetings...

Stop focusing all of your mental and psychical energy on not watching porn/ fapping...

You also have to deal with the deep emotional reasons for the addiction. When is the last time you cried? Honestly... stop repressing your emotions, you gotta let it out!!!

Look into bioenergetics, Elliot Hulse has some good videos on this type of therapy.

Stop compulsively checking for new advice on NoFap, get out of the house!
The more you focus on not watching porn, the more you think about it which triggers cravings and leads to relapse after relapse. Deal with the emotional suffering, find out why you have an addictions, be grateful your'e not addicted to cocaine, heroine or alcohol... Imagine what would your life look like without the addiction?

Look into recovery programs whether it is open AA meetings, SAA, SLAA, addiction counselling, CBT... find what works for you!