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[REBOOT FASTER] Small things to do

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Megasameru, Dec 17, 2017.

  1. Megasameru

    Megasameru Fapstronaut

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    Hi, I wanted to make a list of small things I do that I feel helped me to reboot faster and feel better, or things I think would be helpful but never tried. This is more like a list I needed to write down to myself, but I hope it can help more people. Please, feel free to contribute, I want to make this a big list.
    Personal Hygiene
    One of the most important things I believe will make you feel better with yourself is maintaining your personal image. It will help you not only to be more accepted socially, but will make you look at yourself and say "Hey, that's me and I'm getting better".
    • Change your shower habits
    Bathe/take a shower more often (if you shower everyday, you're ok). Usually when we're addicted to PMO, we just have a shower after masturbating to clean up, or we dont wash ourselves because we think we're probably gonna do it again later so we just keep with it on. Even if you take a shower after masturbating, you're going to end up post-cumming after the shower, or anyway you'll still be stinking like a masturbator because your body still generates that odor. You just need to shower more often than you currently do, and try to use cold water. If you cannot stand a whole shower with cold water yet, have a little before getting out. Every time you take a shower add colder water and more cold water time. Eventually you'll get used to it and it feels great.
    If you have a bidet, have a cold shot (not too high pressure) to your genitalia to overcome urges instantly.

    • Change your sheets
    If you're not the kind that changes his sheets everyday, start doing it. You dont need to change them every single day, just change them at least at your 3rd day of NoFap. Those sheets are impregnated with the smell of the older you, and I assure you that it makes you feel he is still you.

    • Take care of your image
    You don't do it to impress girls, you do it for yourself. Shave properly, (preferably use an electric shaver more often than the razor to avoid getting pimples) dress with nice clean clothes, clothes that you like and feel comfortable with, get a proper haircut, you'll see yourself as a different person with a nice and different haircut, brush your teeth everyday, etc.


    Lifestyle
    Not everything is NoFap. If you want to be a different person and reboot properly you'll need to change some of your most internalized and harmful habits. Of course for that you'll need a lot more help that this post can give, but here are a few small things you can do to get a start.

    • Get out more
    You're at it. You're at your first week of NoFap and you can feel a little difference. But you haven't left the bed ever since. This cannot be healthy. You need to get out, no matter where you go, have a small walk to the park or a few kilometers downtown, but walk out of the bedroom. It will make you feel more relaxed and you'll spend a little energy in an useful thing. When you're at your house, nothing can happen. The probabilites of anything happening are drastically reduced because of the limitations of the things you can experience. Once you go out, the probabilities boost to the clouds. Anything can happen.

    • Eat more/eat healthier
    One of the things I notice in most mad/depressed/angry people is that they calm down completely after having a proper meal, and they dont realize it even after eating it. Most people wont ever realize they are feeling bad because of their diet, and when I try to make them notice they wont agree. What I'd recommend is to go to a specialist to make a diet for you, but in the meantime, if you don't suffer obesity problems, then eat more. What I mean is, when you're feeling depressed, anxious, angry, meditate about that feeling and try to see if it comes from hunger. Then make yourself a sandwich, or even better, learn to cook for yourself (one of the most important abilities you can have). It is not hard at all once you get started, we mostly dont do it because of we don't know where to start. Check out Supercook, a page that search recipes with the ingredients you have at home. However, it is very important that you dont use food to deal with your problems. Dont use it to stop thinking about something you must solve. Eat a proper breakfast, a proper meal and a proper dinner everyday, but use the rest of your time to do constructive things. It is not recommended to eat between foods. Remember to eat fruits.

    • Drink water
    Water cleans your body. Whatever you do, if you're PMOing or not, drink lots of water. After masturbating you loss lots of liquid that you must refill, it is then very important to drink water. Make sure you drink at least 2lts a day, don't think it is enough with tea, coffee or fruits, as for much water they have it is "dirty" water, meaning it will be able to carry less toxics out of your body. Within a few weeks of drinking water everyday you'll already feel a softer skin, more energy and a normalized defecation schedule.

    • Meditate/Exercise
    Both are great. Both go hand to hand. Meditation is easier than you think, it is just disconnecting from everything around and focusing in one issue inside your mind. Usually the purpose is learning to relax and shut the mind up. It helps you to be aware of your thoughts, feelings and emotions and be able to control them. You can find techniques online, but an easy one is to focus on your breath. Breath slowly, and pay all of your attention to the breathing only. Dont think about it, just be aware of it. For starters 5 minutes a day everyday at the same hour will do it. You can use Medativo, an useful app to count and record your meditations, remind you the days and hours and help you with background sounds. Also I've been told of Headspace wich you should check out. Its guided meditation with different modes and durations.
    Exercising is one of the best ways to spend all that energy you'll be saving up. I dont know very much about it, so what I'd recommend is a personal trainer, but if not there are a lot of apps out there that can coach you. For starters, just go out and walk, or walk up and down the stairs a few times.
    If you're planning to do both, meditate before exercising. It makes you feel more aware of your body.
    Fabulous is an amazing app wich has a lot of healthy projects to build up your life. It is really motivating.

    • Sleep well
    Easier to say it than to do it. Probably the worst symptom of depression is insomnia, and inconveniently insomnia also causes depression. It is very likely that once you do the four items above daily, you'll sleep like a baby, but if you need to correct your schedule right now, do this: No matter what hour you went to sleep, force yourself to wake up at the hour you want to by putting a strong alarm and a bottle of water at the side of the bed. Get up inmediatly and drink water, then go to make a big breakfast. You'll have enough energy for a few hours, and then you'll feel very tired. Doesn't matter how tired you feel, keep yourself awake till the night. Propose youself the hour you'll be sleeping, drink a herbal tea and go to sleep.


    Thoughts and beliefs
    To change your thoughts and beliefs may be one of the hardest parts. It is not impossible though, and the first step is knowing you are able to do it. Establishing or changing your thoughts and beliefs is the most important thing you can ever do to change yourself into a better person
    • Stop objectizing women/men
    This is very important, and you'll probably not reboot at all if you dont do it. Make sure you are completely committed not to objectize women in the future. Think about why you dont want to objectize women. Every time you are about to enter to a girls instagram to check her out because she's hot, think about the reason why you dont want to objectize women. Every time you turn around to see a butt, think about the reason. Every time you are trying to seduce a person to fulfil your repressed sexual desire, think about the reason. This doesn't mean making you feel bad for having those desires. Those desires are perfectly normal in a person who has watched porn his entire life. Your body thinks that's the way to go. Teach it it's not by reminding yourself what are your purposes and the reasons, and if you feel those desires, understand thats normal and that you're changing it.

    • Stop victimizing yourself
    To stop considering yourself a victim doesnt mean throw all of the guilt on you. It means making you responsible of the things you can change, and making aware that you can change yourself because in fact you can. Saying "I can't do it because I was taught that way" may be true, but that doesn't make it less of an excuse. The solution is often explicit in the excuse: "You were taught that way? Teach yourself the other way". Also, believe it or not, affirmations have an enormous potential to change things. Saying "I can't" will make you believe it. Say the things you want to be instead, say "I can change and I will change", because you can and you will. Excuses may be true, but they are worthless because no matter what position you are in, you are always capable of getting better. Everytime you're about to say an excuse to yourself or anyone else, think of this three things:
    1. Is this fact completely true? Try and explain it detailed with no emotions attached.

    2. If it's true, is this fact actually stopping me from fulfiling my purpose?

    3. If it does, what can I do to change this fact?



    This list is uncomplete. Please feel free to add more things, and IF THERE ARE ANY SPELLING, GRAMATIC OR CONCEPT MISTAKES, PLEASE CORRECT ME AS ENGLISH IS NOT MY NATIVE LANGUAGE.

    I need help with:
    -Scientifical reasons.
    -Meditation examples. More advice.
    -Exercises examples. More advice.
    -Thoughts and beliefs to change.

    Thanks for reading!
     
    Last edited: Jan 9, 2018
  2. dragonslayer

    dragonslayer Fapstronaut

    Great post. A lot of important points brought together. I think stopping to objectifying women is a major step for guys trying to quit and it can make a lot of difference.

    Meditation has been a great help to me to be aware of my thoughts, feelings and emotions. Only when you are aware, can you control them. Otherwise you will be controlled by them and that's not what we want.

    There is a great app for meditation - Headspace. Check it out. I even got the paid version of it, but It's free version is also cool to check out.
     
    Megasameru likes this.
  3. Megasameru

    Megasameru Fapstronaut

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    Thank you! I'll add your thought and the app to the list if you dont mind.

    Thanks to you!!
     
    2525 likes this.
  4. Megasameru

    Megasameru Fapstronaut

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    Resuming, how to reboot faster:

    -Take a shower everyday
    -Change your sheets often
    -Take care of your personal image
    -Go out more often
    -Eat well
    -Drink water everyday
    -Meditate, do exercise
    -Sleep well
    -Stop objectizing women
    -Stop victimizing yourself
     
  5. James_007

    James_007 Fapstronaut

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    Yes nice post. This will help lot of people.
     
    Megasameru likes this.
  6. MarkTT52947

    MarkTT52947 Fapstronaut

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    A real great post. I am printing it out. The messed up mind does crappy stuff because they think nothing good will come so why not mess up. You want something big and magical and overwhelming to happen, but life is the small stuff. Do something small, walking is very very good, as there is no excuse unless you are crippled. If you shut yourself in anway from others, even going to the store and talking to the cashier about your bill will do more for you than chatting with your best friend on the Internet. Do little things. Nothing more important than taking care of your home, your hygiene, your job,
     
    Deleted Account and Megasameru like this.
  7. mikepatton

    mikepatton Fapstronaut

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    Great thread, I really liked the non objectizing part, I really believe in it and I try not to do so.' I'm new here and english is not my native language too, just to get clear.
    So, about the scientific part, I think I can say a word or two. I'm graduating in Psychology and there is a theorical approach called behaviorism, wich I think is one of the most effectives if you're talking about changing a simple behavior. I'll try to make it short: almost every behavior we have follows that chain: a previous event (or stimuli) > leads to our response > that cause some consequence (reward or punishment). Depending on that consequences in all your history, you'll repeat that response (when you get a reward) or stop doing that (when you get punished). So, to change a behaviour, you have to know clearly well these chain of events. I'll try to apply that on the behavior of masturbating:
    There are many things that leads you to want to masturbate (the previous event/stimuli), let's suppose you see an outdoor with a woman in bikinis in your way back home. Then when you get there, you go to your room and do it (the response), and it feels good right before you do it (the consequence, a reward in that case). Here you see the chain of events in a behaviour. How could you change that? You have to change either the previous event or the consequence (or the way you see it), or both. You could change your way back home so you don't see the outdoor anymore. And about the consequence, even if you get the "reward", sometimes you get the punishment too (feeling sad, lose energy, etc), or you could do something more practical like "Everytime I masturbate, I will throw 50 cents away".
    Sorry if it got complicated, but it's hard to me simplify all that theory in other language but not mine. But I'm pretty sure that you can find that all over the internet in any language you want. If you want to ask me anything, just send a PM.
     
  8. Megasameru

    Megasameru Fapstronaut

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    Thank you! I hope it will, hope you follow through!

    Dude, thanks for your support! Im really glad you are printing this out, thought it isnt as complete as I'd want.
    We are so used to the mechanism of instant reward, that we won't accept the change cannot be RIGHT NOW, and that is a ongoing permanent work. We must work everysingle day for being better persons. Taking care of yourself is really important!!
     
  9. Megasameru

    Megasameru Fapstronaut

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    Thank you very much!! Its really hard to express oneself in a non-native language. You did perfect by the way! Its great that you are studying psychology, I understood perfectly the behaviours issue, and it is a great advice. Creating real rewards or real punishments, as long as they are accurate to the situation, can be really helpful. Whats your native language?
     
  10. TrappedInTorment

    TrappedInTorment Fapstronaut

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    I almost just relapsed for the second time today, but took your advice about the shower. I didn't have it cold exactly, but lets say less than luke warm! I know it's a cliche, but it killed my erection dead and also I did feel rejuvinated after, motivated to get done what needs doing today.

    NoFap itself is promoted a lot I know, but for those of us who experience this thing as something we've been indoctrinating ourselves into for 7+ years or more, its very easy to neglect the site when we need it most. I'd recommend hardcore sufferers try to post here every day at least once, at the time when you are most likely to relapse. For me, this is the period between 9 in the morning and 2 in the afternoon. Just a simple post reminds you of the program you are working under, and that today is another fight to the death. It motivates you to plan your day around not masturbating, finding things to do that need doing, whether thats cleaning your damn room or reading a good book. I'm telling you guys, just when you think that you got it beat and you'll at least reach your target, at the last minute, IT WILL HIT YOU with everything it has. You will forget about NoFap, you'll masturbate thinking that you wont even climax, you're just relieving tension. DO NOT DO THIS. Go straight for the shower, and as OP said, try to take it much colder than you normally would.
     
  11. Megasameru

    Megasameru Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for your reply! Cold showers are of the most effective instant methods. Not only they help with the sudden urges, in the long run they make you more active, focused and healthy.
    ANOTHER SUDDEN URGE METHOD:
    If you have a Bidet, use it (gently) in your ass and balls with cold water. It is way easier than an entire cold shower, and it really lowers the libido.
     
  12. Badra123

    Badra123 Fapstronaut

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  13. Megasameru

    Megasameru Fapstronaut

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    Moving this thread up. Happy 2018, thanks for reading!!
     
  14. bigsmoke123

    bigsmoke123 Fapstronaut

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    This post is incredible, very inspirational to read. I've been trying to do most of these things, I have been wearing better clothes and grooming to improve my own image (for myself of course) and have been starting to exercise and meditate. However not consistently as of yet, I came after a long day of wanting to relapse but I am very motivated to bring myself to build these good habits daily.
     
    Megasameru and Anonymous86 like this.
  15. liveclean

    liveclean Fapstronaut

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    Great post. Good tips, not only for rebooting but life in general.
     
    Megasameru and Anonymous86 like this.
  16. Megasameru

    Megasameru Fapstronaut

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    Hi, thanks a lot! Its been a while since a wrote it and since the last time logged into this page. Im gonna read it from the top and start doing all of these since Im improving my life once again and you kind of forget these things. Also gonna probably write a few more things. Hope you are doing well with your improvements!!

    Thanks a lot! As I remember that was my point, anyone should be able to get benefits from it whether you are into nofap or not.
     
  17. muterabbit

    muterabbit Fapstronaut

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    I used to cum on my belly when I started puberty, but it’s been like 20 years since I’ve done that and felt like I needed a shower. All the other times I’d just wipe off my dick with a tissue, toilet paper, or paper towel. Ideally I’d take a leak after to flush out my urethra. I’d wash my hands, but I’d never consider a full shower.
     
  18. Haddock

    Haddock Fapstronaut

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    Thanks a lot for this post. This is helpful ! :)
     

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