REALLY need help...

Hey, first of all, sorry. Sorry for not detailing it into whi is she and another stuff since it's really a disgrace to my life. Since if someone IRL know it, I may not be able to live my life normally again. Since if I use the real one, even I'll lose faith on this website again and delete my whole account to keep it as my darkest secret. (I'm a male btw)

---PLEASE BE REALLY CAREFUL SINCE I'LL DETAIL IT AND IT HAS A POTENTIAL TO MAKE SOMEONE ELSE RESET/RELAPSE---

15 days ago, I lost control of myself, and quickly relapse. At that moment, I used a massage tool. Since the surface of the massage tool is rough, and I were influenced with my fetish and some story that I used to read long time ago, I use "her" pants as a cover. Also, due to my hygienic standard and fear of disease, I choose to use a clean one.

I relapse shortly, and the release of it is concentrated at one point. While I'm cleaning it though, I discover that some of the release is scattered around.

I quickly cleaned the surrounding too, and then, I smelled her pants to make sure that I didn't leave any sign of me using it. At this point, that day, I'm pretty sure that I didn't smell any release since my release is kinda strong smelled one. After that, I returned her pants to the shelf. Then, she use her pants approximately more than 5 hours after I used it.(if only I didn't doing all this stuff...)

And then, 12 days later, I remembered this stuff, and quickly losing all my motivation to keep abstaining from PMO. At this point, my memories are already faded off, and I started to not sure that I have cleaned it properly from any possible pregnancy cause. My overthinking brain quickly make a WHOLE LOT scenario included of "what if".

Yesterday, I decided to run off an experiment. I re-do it all and then monitor it for 4 hours in the same environment. I can't say that the release is a drop or it's already scattered but I used the scattered one. Then, after 4 hours of waiting, i discovered that it still not dried completely yet. It's still wet of my release.

Today, I'm still highly concerned of the possibility of pregnancy. I have researched it on the internet, and the medical website one said that if the sperm got the right environment, it can live a whole day. I decided to run off another experiment, and then know that my release is kinda consisted off approximately 30% of clear fluid.

Now, the question is, is there any possibility of pregnancy? Serious...she still, nah, better not tell it. What matter is that she is really important for me, and if something that terrible happened (pregnancy) I may as well being casted of from my family, neighborhood, town, and live with misery.

Thank you for your kindness to read this story. I REALLY appreciate every help that you can provide, since this problem is holding me up to continuing this fight. It feels like I've been too late and that there is no point of doing this anymore...

What a weird story eh?

 

I can't help but re-doing it. The result is...it has dryed up after 5 hours and start to smell so the chance is extremely low to nothing at all. Thank you for all your support guys, I've stressed from this small chance thanks to my wrong mindset.

 

Ah yes, doing all these stuff...I always make sure (after that incident) that I've completely cleaned it with soap + throwing it into dirty clothes so it'll be washed.