Realizing my reality after a break up

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by ThenewDrew, Feb 25, 2016.

  1. ThenewDrew

    ThenewDrew Fapstronaut

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    Now before my relationship I had friends, not great friends but okay friends that just graduated highschool with me. I met my first girlfriend through work that summer and it was my first love so I wanted to spend every moment with her. Two and a half years later she betrayed me and left me for another guy, kicking me out and sending me back to live with my parents. My PMO addiction was definitely an issue with her but there were other factors as well that i wont get into. Its been two months since i moved home and we stopped talking completely. Over the time we spent together i lost connection with a lot of my friends by issolating myself with her and her family and friends. Now that we broke up, her family and friends are still nice to me but dont want me around. Not only that but ive tried to recconect with friends from highschool and well it just didnt work out. So not only did this breakup leave me single, but also friendless. I fell into a depression and im trying to dig myself out but I just cannot connect with anyone, and my anxiety keeps me from leaving my house other than to work. I might be doing better by stopping PMO but I still resort to just sitting around watching netflix or playing a game during my time off work. I also find it crazy how losing my virginity and having a gf for almost three years only made my anxiety around women worse.
     
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  2. avatarivn

    avatarivn Fapstronaut

    Hello.
    Sorry to read about what happened to you.

    Please don't take this wrong, I guess the reason your anxiety around women increased is because you are afraid something like what you just told us in the post happens again with another woman. Well, you will just kind of have to take the risk anyway.

    The harsh truth is, a worst case scenario has ALREADY HAPPENED to you, and if you make the effort, this experience will prompt you to grow as a person. Just learn from it.

    In relationships, I think all of us have to take the risk of getting hurt because if not, the relationship is not so important and most of the time we won't be willing to effort on it.
     
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  3. ThenewDrew

    ThenewDrew Fapstronaut

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    Thanks i definitly have come to realize that my bad break up has made me even more anxious around women than before. The thing is I also have had bad friendships that ended because they took advantage of me or they simply abandoned me as a friend. I feel like my anxiety attracts people who will eventually hurt me. It gets to the point where it stops me from interacting with people and I issolate myself and regret it when I am home alone doing nothing.
     
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  4. SONofVEnus

    SONofVEnus Fapstronaut

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    You seem like a very mature guy.

    Maybe you grown up a lot in this relationship and the past relationships don't suit you anymore???? Maybe???
    Maybe you just really want to have a time for your self for a little while, to understand what happened and to find a new way to connect with new kind of people..... maybe those who will deserve you.....???? Maybe??? Who knows???
     
  5. Chef Boy

    Chef Boy Fapstronaut

    You let your relationship take over your life which is a massive mistake, but you live and learn. You have my empathy and all I can suggest is putting yourself out there. Join clubs, societies, online dating, whatever.
     

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