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Question: I orgasmed without masturbating, does it count as a relapse?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Forsak3n, Jun 22, 2019.

  1. Jun 22, 2019 #1
    Forsak3n

    Forsak3n New Fapstronaut

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    I started my nofap journey on the 15th June (I have been trying since April) and this time I really felt like I would be able to succeed. I was watching a video on Youtube of a podcast. Where basically there are four girls, one guy as king of the hill, and a guest who is trying to impress the four ladies. After he has told them a bit about himself, the girls vote who they think is the better person, who they would more likely date, and who they want as the new king of the hill. There is one girl amongst them who's got some huge tits. I was watching 1 or 2 episodes which lasts more than an hour, and she was in both of them. When suddenly the last couple of minutes, I started getting an erection from watching her while I was laying on my stomach. When that happened, I tried to look away and focus on something else when suddenly I busted a huge nut. Mind you, I did not edge, I did not rub, I did not masturbate, I did absolutely nothing. I did not get a dopamine rush either. And while I have seen some sexy pictures of girls on Instagram before (I’m still working on it) I have never gotten a dopamine rush and I have always quickly turned away and felt much better when I did so. At most I have only felt a moderate tingle in my penis, which I felt this time. This is the first time this has happened to me. I busted a nut without touching my penis!

    My question is, does this count as a relapse?

    Do I have to start over?

    I mean, I was definitely on a slippery slope watching that girl, and I did get a little excited at the end, but I did not expect to bust a nut. I'm honestly not even mad if I have to start over since I was only at day 8 and I feel like I have improved so much already.

    As you can probably see, I have started my timer from day one just to be on the safe side, and I am not demotivated by this at all.

    As always keep your grind up and keep working hard. And just as a tip to you guys. Take it from somebody who was relapsed many times while being on a good streak. Whenever you start getting an erection or feel a tingle in your penis, and you find yourself searching for more. Just close the tab, or your phone, and just find something else to do.
     
    Forsak3n, Jun 22, 2019
    Forsak3n, Jun 22, 2019
    #1
  2. Jun 22, 2019 #2
    Fightyourlowerself

    Fightyourlowerself Fapstronaut

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    I think if the girl in the video was dressed in a normal way i.e. the same that you might encounter going outside your house then I wouldn't count this as a relapse because you have not gone out your way to look at anything and you could have just as easily encountered a similar girl outside.
     
    Fightyourlowerself, Jun 22, 2019
    Fightyourlowerself, Jun 22, 2019
    #2
  3. Jun 22, 2019 #3
    IGY

    IGY Fapstronaut
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    First, Welcome (with your first post). Secondly, I commend you for being so honest and resetting your counter to be on the safe side. I expect you will get some that say it was the right thing to do and others might disagree. I have never experienced the situation you were in. As a guy that has recently been through puberty (or is still going through it), your body will be hyper sensitive to sexual stimulation. Of course, laying on your stomach when you have an erection can produce all the pressure necessary for you to bust a nut. Although it sounds like you busted both your nuts, hahaha! :rolleyes: :p

    What you need to recognize is that shows like that can be a p/sub i.e. a substitute for porn. Even though clothed, you were clearly aroused by the woman with the big tits. In future, I suggest that you steer clear of anything that arouses you mate.
     
    IGY, Jun 22, 2019
    IGY, Jun 22, 2019
    #3
  4. Jun 22, 2019 #4
    IGY

    IGY Fapstronaut
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    I see what you are saying. When outside, who is nearby is beyond your control. But to spend more than an hour looking at a programme with someone that he was aroused by is careless or naïve from a NoFap point of view. :oops: That's my opinion.
     
    IGY, Jun 22, 2019
    IGY, Jun 22, 2019
    #4
  5. Jun 22, 2019 #5
    Fightyourlowerself

    Fightyourlowerself Fapstronaut

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    Hi Igy,

    Yes - I understand your perspective.

    I agree with your opinion in a specific situation - if we were watching this TV programme for the reason of seeing that girl, then this is a problem.

    The reason I lean towards my opinion is because watching TV programmes generally is normal and it's quite likely we will carry on doing this throughout our lives so we are going to encounter these triggers regularly.

    In the same way we encounter people in our personal lives that are really attractive. Sometimes we will have to speak to them as classmates/colleagues etc so these triggers are going to affect us on a day to day basis.

    I therefore think its not appropriate to count this as a relapse because it was unintended as a result of a perfectly normal situation - watching TV (again assuming we are not watching it to arouse us).

    If we count this as a relapse the same should be said about if we ever accidently orgasm just by seeing a pretty women or other scenarios which were unintentionally arousing.
     
    Fightyourlowerself, Jun 22, 2019
    Fightyourlowerself, Jun 22, 2019
    #5
  6. Jun 22, 2019 #6
    IGY

    IGY Fapstronaut
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    Hello Fightyourlowerself, I understand your perspective also. I am not strongly in favour of resetting or not resetting in this instance. It's unusual, compared to most questions: "Do I need to reset my counter?" as he has already reset it anyway. ;)
    This is quite reasonable. :) However, when we are trying to reboot after years of abusing our brain's reward circuits with sexual stimulation, we need to go on quite a strict 'diet of the mind' IMO. But it is his call as to how to proceed from here.
     
    IGY, Jun 22, 2019
    IGY, Jun 22, 2019
    #6
  7. Jun 23, 2019 #7
    Forsak3n

    Forsak3n New Fapstronaut

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    Firstly, I just wanted to say that this community is awesome, I did not expect to get any replies and I'm grateful that you guys take the time out of your day to help me with this matter. Maybe you misunderstood or misread, but as I wrote in the post.
    I got an erection only the last couple of minutes, and I watched the show for comedic purposes only, as it featured a very funny and entertaining guy those episodes I watched, I did not watch it because of her, it all happened really fast.
    The girl was dressed normally. But her cleavage was definitely showing as her tits were quite...The size. And she was incredibly attractive as well. This really feels like a relapse though, I'm not horny anymore, I can think straight and I feel completely normal because I orgasmed. Well, I learnt a lot from this and I ain't quitting now.
     
    Forsak3n, Jun 23, 2019
    Forsak3n, Jun 23, 2019
    #7
  8. Jun 23, 2019 #8
    IGY

    IGY Fapstronaut
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    You are most welcome @Forsak3n. A lesson learnt is always helpful. Good luck with your NoFap challenge mate. :)
     
    IGY, Jun 23, 2019
    IGY, Jun 23, 2019
    #8

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