Porn Isn't The Bad Guy

I agree with what I believe the central thrust of your post is; that addicts and even people in general often shift blame and minimize the role of their own decisions and actions in the problems they've caused. I notice even with some non-drinkers; they demonize alcohol as poison. They personify it and blame it for derailing their lives. And we need to look first and foremost at our own role because that is the only thing we can control.

I would say that there is shared responsibility for evils done in a lot of these cases, even though the burden falls on the individual to overcome the odds regardless. I believe that sex is a good thing; when experienced in its proper context. Pornography is an abuse of that, and preys on a natural weakness that many people have for companionship, sexual pleasure, etc. Porn is bad, imo, but it's still ultimately our decision to use it. Casinos can go too far advertising to hook people particularly weak to gambling, and get them inebriated so they make poor decisions, etc. There can be some responsibility for wrong-doing in certain cases, but as you say no one puts a gun to the gambling addict's head and forces him to go.

There is a small kernel of truth people are hitting upon when they want to blame pornography producers or casinos for their problems. They can sense that there is sometimes something insidious trying to make profit from their existing weaknesses. But the victim mindset grossly distorts this in an effort to justify one's own actions or escape blame. And this is very counter-productive to recovery and living a mature life. Good post to point this out.

 

At OP, totally agree. The key to overcoming the addiction is to accept using is, and only is, a personal choice. That does not make the choice easy, but, it must be understood, using is a choice.

 

Sorry but I gotta disagree with you. If you say the addict is to blame... then you are basically saying the provider is blameless.
I think it would be fairer to share the blame 50/50... for some reason this seems too complicated for many people and they feel they have to blame one thing.

 

I agree that people shouldn’t blame porn for their problems its a "escape" just like any other drugs. Stopping the drugs will not magically solve you're problems. Stopping the addiction will cause you to get healthier but you still have to use you're mental health to achieve things. Stop porn and go out socializing. Go out and get new friends. Start talking to girls. Get a life.. Or get a better job focus on career.

However i don't agree with you on this. Porn is a hard drugs just like cocaine, or crack it does really fucked up things with you're mind. So you are saying cocaine in moderation is good.. No its not why? because just like cocaine porn is really adictive you start out with only 1 video and you end up getting hooked...

So i would NEVER say to my kids porn is good in moderation. because of the same reason i wouldn't say drugs is ok kids.

Its scientific proven that porn is as addictive as cocaine to our brain. So that would make you thinx twice before saying moderation is ok.

 

I can't stop the flow of crud, but I can change my way of thinking so that I do not want to get back into that mucky stream. Then, maybe together we can do something to slow and stop the muck.
Years ago, when I was a kid, the town creek smelled like a rotting cesspool. We were not allowed not play in it or go near it, but we did what kids do. They have since cleaned it up, added walkways, and made it beautiful. Out of town they have a sewage processing plant, but the main stream is safe and enjoyable for all. Some businesses were not happy about the process, but the results shout success.
Yes, the muck is bad, but the first step is realizing that I need to get out of it, stay out of it, and then work to clean it up.

 

I don't compare porn to crack or heroin the types of drugs that everyone would become addicted to no matter who, they are physically addictive. I compare it to alcohol or food or marijuana. Most if not many people can use it in moderation on occasion and not have any issues. But some do. It believe the disease of addiction is usually hereditary in the sense that you can be more prone than others. I think most addicts also have an underlying mental health issue which is due to brain chemistry. I don't think all porn is evil. There are plenty of men and women who use it and never get addicted or have issues I was one of them and many men watch porn but not all are addicted. As addicts I think it's hard to imagine how someone cannot be addicted to it and I think many addicts think that's just not fair! How can they watch it in moderation and I can't! So deeming it to be evil to all is easier to accept. Also blaming porn won't help. It will always be there. It's not going to be illegal. So sure it's bad okay but in your recovery blaming the producers gets you no where. All addicts have a choice to choose to get help. And to me either you do or you don't. That's not the fault of porn.

 

Word.

 

There are some valid points in your post but porn is still evil. It might not be the ultimate evil but it is still very evil and as long as porn is around, issues such as the exploitation of various groups will be around.

 

You are buying into a big lie when you say porn is not evil in it self. You are correct that we all make decisions, and can make bad decisions that lead to bad consequences. We should not run away from this and tried to put the blame on someone else for our poor choices. However, your argument is like saying that methamphetamine is not an evil in itself. Yes it is. Just like porn, it is primarily used as a mechanism of a escape and destroys peoples lives. The world would be better off without methamphetamine and pornography. They have no valuable uses, and to the extent you can conjure up some proper purpose, the benefits of this are far outweighed by the detriments.

 

Watching porn is a choice. I don't need the morality police watching and regulating people behavior usuallu if anything it backfires. Its called the iron law of prohibition. Not everyone who watches porn becomes addicted.

 

I agree with you. If the case was that it was pure evil than everyone who watched would get addicted and we know that's just not true.

 

But that's the thing it will always be around. Just like guns and drugs and booze. The solution is education.

 

I said it in another post, you don't have to throw the baby out with the bathwater.

 

For me, understanding that porn is a tool, a means to an end, that we use to give ourselves a dopamine high, was necessary for me to overcome the addiction. That said, during the reboot, I encourage people to hate it, to defriend it, to divorce it, to make it the enemy, and if feeling it is evil helps keep away from it, then feel it is evil. I know this, what it does to an addict's brain, that sure as F is evil.

 

I think this kind of thinking is dangerous, at least it is for me. Now that I struggle with this habit when my mind is in that weakened state craving whatever it is that it craves[escape, safety,?] it will try to convince me of the things OP said that porn and masturbation in moderation are fine and healthy. Even though I have years of experience telling me otherwise. Even though one single relapse will lead me to feeling absolutely horrible even though it has devasting effects on me the lie that it is harmless and natural is something my mind will cling to in order get me to relapse and get what my malfunctioning mind desires. For me, there is no upside to porn and MO, and it devastates me emotionally affects me negatively mentally and physically.



To paraphrase what OP said " Casinos, drugs, porn, can't be blamed " This is a naive way to look at human nature or a deliberately devious way of looking. These are predatory elements meant to corrupt people, harm them, rob them of wealth, freedom and ultimately destroy them.

You say Gambling/Porn can't be blamed. As in no action should be taken against them, they are blameless and should be allowed to do as they please in the name of freedom? Yet when a Casino moves into town people start becoming homeless, people start prostituting themselves, crime goes up, families become unstable. You can say the same for porn and drugs to varying degrees. Drugs lead to tons of crime, porn does tons of harm to families, children, youth, society.

Yes, you are responsible for your own actions, but there is no good reason to condone these harmful destructive habits and society is better of without them. Freedum* to corrupt and ruin my society is not something I want you or anyone else to have.

* intentional misspelling.

 

This guy doesn't know the consequences of porn and the reward system of our brain. Orgasme gives us the most amount of dopamine in our body.

http://fightthenewdrug.org/how-porn-affects-the-brain-like-a-drug/







Porn change you're brain so good in moderation?.

 

Yes sir. Thank you.

Wonderful analogy.

 

Yep porn isn't only adictive its helps sex traficing:

http://fightthenewdrug.org/by-the-numbers-porn-sex-trafficking-connected/

IT KILLS LOVE