partners hand

It depends on the terms of your reboot. Is your reboot hard mode, no Os? If so, then, yes you relapsed. If sex with a partner is allowed, then maybe no. Unless you decide hand jobs aren't allowed. You set the terms, ideally with the input of your partner. It sounds like maybe you and your partner need to set more clear terms of what this reboot will be.

https://www.NoFap.com/rebooting/
I recommend you read the above link, especially the section that starts: parameters (large type and bold) and below that, modes.

My two cents is that your recovery is much more important than a few seconds of pleasure. Since May, my husband has done 40, then 90 and now is half way through another 60 day hard mode reboot. There may be more but I can't remember. Thanks to finding out about karezza (see link in my signature) we have had plenty of wonderful sex but he just refrains from O. I highly recommend you consider it.

Also read the link in my signature about FANOS. It can help repair a relationship and increase communication.

 

I completed a 360 day reboot at the end of July and went back to sex - except my wife ( who is several years post menopause) really has no desire for sex was happy to "help me out" once a week with a hand job. That was fine for a while - but I drifted back to PMO. I am beginning to think that the hand jobs were more "masturbation by proxy" and now feel that unless it is true intercourse when both are getting pleasure - then you should not do it. For me that may mean long term celibacy. We will see. For the moment I am in a hard mode re-boot