One week under my belt

It's been 1 entire week since I have not M while watching porn. I would love to tell you that it's amazing and I feel great. I would love to tell you that my mind is fog free and I can think right.

Well I don't feel like I will die but I'm struggling on a daily basis. Specially after a long day of stress.
I have tried to stop in the past but reverted back to my old ways because I was used to them. It was easy and soothing. Yet I was missing up my life. What really triggered me to stop was in my business meeting.

I belong to a business group and each members owns and runs their own business. Their revenues range from $1 million to $7 million a year so I know they have been through the ups and downs of life.

During our last meeting, the entire group spent 30 minutes analyzing my business issues. The conclusion was to stop holding on to my old habits and work harder at my future. That hit me really hard. (They don't know that I'm addicted to P)

They say the truth hurts well it did. Here I'm on the verge of doing my dream job, becoming a public motivator and coach, and yet I'm sabotaging my success by watching P. So I told myself no more. No more I will M while watching P.

Another action that I took was to move away from one of my friends. I don't have a lot of friends so he was a cool guy. We traveled together and knew about the P and M because we both would talk about. Yet I knew that he was not ready to change his negative habits of watching P. And every time we hung out he would talk about females and wanted to go to a happy ending massage places. When ever we traveled to a foreign country, his primary goal was to find hookers. Before I started hanging with him I used to travel to a certain area for the beauty of it's people, geography, and anything else. But after traveling with my friend I found myself focusing on where to find the hookers.

I was growing out of that old habit and he was not and thus our paths were going in different directions.


I believe with time this feeling of shittiness will go away. I will be independent of watching P and become a very success business/motivation coach. In time I will help others in their life by sharing my personal story of what it is to overcome addictions and love myself once again.

Thank you for reading and if you have any success stories please share.