NoFap normal mode vs hard mode

Yes. I went 72 days then started hard mode. First 3 weeks were hell, then things started to get better. Hard mode done right forces the neuro pathways to breakdown and give you a true reboot. It also forces a lot of the character deficiencies and immaturities to surface. They become painfully obvious to yourself. Hardmode was the first time I had gone a week without an orgasm since I was probably 12 years old (28 now). I would reccomend you commit to 60-90 days of hardmode. Its very difficult, my wife misses sex as do I! But its helping us connect on a more intimate level and building up some anticipation for our future sex life. We feel like horny teenagers who are desperely in love again, its actually been amazing.

Definitely give yourself the gift of hardmode. Its a very short term sacrifice with long term benefits. It will be very difficult the first 3 weeks. You will experience some intense withdrawal. If you are like me you will have some pretty wild mood swings. Tell your partner you may need some space and need to emotionally distance yourself for a short period of time while you work through it. Around Week 3, the withdrawal symptoms started to taper, I started to feel like myself, and my relationship with my wife started to become even more incredible.

 

what is the difference between hard mode and normal mode?
i am new here, i need help...

 

Okey.. what if I obstain from porn and masturbation only, but keep having sex? I can't ejaculate while having sex anyway and my penile sensitiviity is very low. Does it still count as the hard mode even if i don't orgasm?

 

Not being able to ejaculate itself is a problem so that’s not hard mode. Hard mode means abstinence from everything sexual period.

 

I have a Girlfriend, its just impossible to do not have any orgasm in 150 days.
I am trying the normal-mode. Thx

 

Hey i see u are with 80+ days.
Are u feeling better? 90 days = reboot?

 

My story:
Two years of horrible delayed ejaculation where I could not climax during intercourse with my wife. She could finish me manually, but how enjoyable was that for her?

At the root of it: resentment issues with my wife from years of sub-standard communication, leading to a bad porn habit coupled with death-grip masturbation. I had desensitized myself and conditioned my brain to expect death-grip pressure before I could climax.

The first step: re-established communication with the wife and admitted I had a problem. Asked for her support on a rather awkward journey into male sexual function. She wanted better sex, so she was onboard.

Next: no porn. period. no masturbation, no sexual release for TWO WEEKS. Not 90 days, just TWO WEEKS.

Here's the thing. I had to recondition myself to derive stimulative pleasure from thrusting during intercourse, not from manual stimulation. But abstaining is only good for stopping you from further hurting yourself. But I was not, repeat NOT recovering yet, until I reconditioned myself to derive stimulative pleasure from the right kind of stimulation. But how do you do that in a safe and non-judgemental setting when you have years of failed attempts with your wife?

Answer: for me, I had to first learn how to do it on my own. So I bought a vaginal Fleshlight. What a great investment that was. First time I used it, I felt almost nothing, I thrust away and after an hour, I gave up and abstained a few more days before trying again. Next time after 48 mins with the blue pill, a cock ring and a vibrating prostate massager, I was able to do it. Yes it took all that extra help, but the fundamental problem I had was that I had convinced myself that I could no longer climax without manual stimulation. This single act shattered all of that, and that was HUGE.

Next time I tried with the Fleshlight was 5 days later and it took 13 minutes with just the blue pill, and my sexual confidence was restoring itself quickly. The next time was only 5 minutes with nothing but the Fleshlight and lube. And now I was ready to try again with my wife, and from the moment I inserted, I recognized my newly restored sensitivity. I had quickly retrained my body to expect stimulation from insertive intercourse, no longer from hands. I helped her have two climaxes before I had mine. It was wonderful sex again, and it only took about a month of intensive effort. Not 90 days of sexual frustration only to begin actual recovery at that point. Yikes.

For DE sufferers out there I truly believe this approach has greater merit over a hard reboot. You cannot recover from DE until you retrain your body to accept stimulation from the proper motion, context and sensations of intercourse. You just cannot do that while you are abstaining. And, it is too difficult to do this with your partner if you have a history of repeated failures--further failure will only reinforce the problem. For me, the Fleshlight was the critical element to retrain myself and restore my sexual confidence. Many on this site poo-poo them as "artificial" but jacking yourself with a deathgrip to porn is way more artificial than that.

Your mileage may vary, but for DE sufferers, I highly recommend trying this kind of adaptive retraining before attempting a hard mode reboot. You and your partner may be very glad you did. Even if it does not work for you, you can always try the hard mode reboot as a last resort. Some will still swear by it.

 

yes, it's a problem, but i'm not able to ejaculate because of porn, not because of a real sexual interaction, so why hard mode is "to obstain from anything sexual"? Hard mode is "NO ORGASM", so if there is no orgasm it means its no orgasm so it is hard mode

 

After a 40 year PMO habit I started Nofap a week ago. It has been ages since I finished during intercourse and like magic, after only 5 days of complete abstaining, I had a powerful orgasm inside my girlfriend. She and I were both amazed. This is my lifestyle from now on. Hoping for complete recover from my PIED.

 

I think it depends on the person. While I went through this addiction I really didn't have a problem with sex as long as I didn't come using porn that day or didn't watch it altogether. so I think normal mode is OK for me. If having sex has become a huge problem because of this then I think you need the hard mode.

 

Hard mode really is the most effective but might be really difficult in a relationship context.

 

How you did hardmode along with your wife I want to do same. I am married but my wife and I can't control specially at night. Did you sleep together or alone.. Guide me please

 

How you are completing your 90 days .. What is your frequency of sex daily weekly or monthly