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New here, married

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by hamilton99, Feb 13, 2017.

  1. Feb 13, 2017 #1
    hamilton99

    hamilton99 Fapstronaut

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    Hi everyone!

    I'm new here and would like to introduce myself and seek some help.
    I'm 29, happily newly married. I've been with now my wife for almost two years. I Love my wife and she loves me!
    I've been watching porn and masturbating though since I was a teenager. And recently I encountered a problem of problem getting hard or staying hard.
    My wife is very supporting and tries everything to make me calm and relaxed.
    After a while I've done research and stumbled upon articles about Porn Induced Erectyle Dysfunction, and then I found NoFap.

    I know you guys are non-judgemental and supportive.
    So I want to completely quit watching porn and masturbate and only have orgasms with my wife.

    I hope to have your support and encouragement!
    Thank you!
     
    Last edited: Feb 13, 2017
    hamilton99, Feb 13, 2017
    hamilton99, Feb 13, 2017
    #1
    looking_to_chance and i_wanna_get_better1 like this.
  2. Feb 13, 2017 #2
    LadyDefiant

    LadyDefiant Fapstronaut

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    Good luck to you on this path. I encourage you to tell your wife (if you haven't already) about what you've discovered and the journey you are about to embark on.
     
    LadyDefiant, Feb 13, 2017
    LadyDefiant, Feb 13, 2017
    #2
    hamilton99 likes this.
  3. Feb 13, 2017 #3
    LifestyleChanged

    LifestyleChanged New Fapstronaut

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    I'm 40 years old, going through the same thing. Taking up a new hobby helps. I walk 2 miles every day with the headphones on. Going on dates with your wife will help also. Not just the average dinner like friends do. search for local museums, festivals, plan a picnic, minor league sports games and other stuff like that. Need to retrain your brain into courting the woman you care about and adjust your dopamine levels so you can actually orgasm with your spouse rather than watching strangers have sex. Good luck on your journey.
     
    LifestyleChanged, Feb 13, 2017
    LifestyleChanged, Feb 13, 2017
    #3
    i_wanna_get_better1 likes this.
  4. Feb 13, 2017 #4
    hamilton99

    hamilton99 Fapstronaut

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    Hey there ! Thanks kindly for your words. Recently we became very active in fitness and hiking with my wife, and will explore meditation also, I want to learn to relax my mind since I'm very prone to overthink all possible things that happen to me and get very sad, where I should be a strong one in the family!
    I'm working on myself every day in order to become a better man for my wife.
    Again thank you for your support, good luck to you on your journey too and God bless!
     
    hamilton99, Feb 13, 2017
    hamilton99, Feb 13, 2017
    #4
    i_wanna_get_better1 likes this.
  5. Feb 13, 2017 #5
    LifestyleChanged

    LifestyleChanged New Fapstronaut

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    There is one thing you should become clear on. "Work on becoming a better man for yourself!" Do it for you not anyone else. Everyone else will reap the benefits from the type of person you become. Don't put the weight of your successes and failures on anyone else. We are in control of the choices we make in every situation.
     
    LifestyleChanged, Feb 13, 2017
    LifestyleChanged, Feb 13, 2017
    #5
  6. Feb 13, 2017 #6
    DonGiovanni

    DonGiovanni Fapstronaut

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    Dude, I wish you best of luck. You are in an EXTREMELY PRIVILEGED position right now. You have it all, the happy supportive wife that wants to deal with you're potentially destructive addiction. I just got dumped because of my porn addiction. Trust me, the key is FULL DISCLOSURE. ABSOLUTE FULL DISCLOSURE. Did you take a 2 second peak at some tits? FULL DISCLOSURE. Did you jerk off to some bikini babes that aren't really porn? FULL DISCLOSURE. It's the only way to lift the horrible fog of guilt that makes our ego step in and try to " protect us" by making us foolishly lie and manipulate.
    You have to make your wife be an active, present participant in this process. Share everything, but also share every single risky fantasy thought, every single risky desire that could make you slip, everything.

    Remember, no matter how much this addiction could possibly hurt you, it will ALWAYS hurt your Significant other TENFOLD. Protect her, and yourself, by sharing absolutely everything.
     
    DonGiovanni, Feb 13, 2017
    DonGiovanni, Feb 13, 2017
    #6
    Married*2*Dr*Jekyll likes this.
  7. Feb 19, 2017 #7
    Married*2*Dr*Jekyll

    Married*2*Dr*Jekyll Guest

    All true. 100 percent
     
    Married*2*Dr*Jekyll, Feb 19, 2017
    Married*2*Dr*Jekyll, Feb 19, 2017
    #7
  8. Mar 2, 2017 #8
    GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

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    This is a great post and spot on from a woman whose partner has PIED.
     
    GG2002, Mar 2, 2017
    GG2002, Mar 2, 2017
    #8

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