Need Help/Advice

@THill98, there are many guys that come to NoFap who want PMO sobriety for the sake of having sex. There are many guys who have been in a rush to have sex because they believed the lie that there was something wrong with being a virgin. There are posts after posts of those guys saying they regretted losing their virginity because the reality wasn't as great as the hype. Being a virgin makes you special, not a freak. Don't sacrifice your being special just to be like everyone else. Ultimately it is your call. Spend time truly considering whether you want to waste your virginity just to say you've had sex. Besides, technically, you have already had sex, oral sex is sex, just not vaginal sex. Either way, focus on your PMO sobriety as a means to make you a better person, not to get sex because if you spend the time to control your addiction for the sake of having sex and you don't get sex soon after, that in itself may cause you to feel NoFap didn't work, and fall back to old ways.

Give it some thought.

 

Hey buddy, a few things here.

1) you gotta practice. You cant be afraid of failure or rejection. start talking to girls, and remove the negative mindset of "i suck and i am not going to get anywhere". replace with "I am learning and growing. This will be uncomfortable, but i am willing to keep working on this until I get better". You went from a victim to a bona fide winner just with that attitude change.

2) I fapped away 3 years of college. Missed SO MANY opportunities. Dont be like me. Dont look back and regret. Fix the issue RIGHT NOW. develop a sense of urgency to get better. You have control over this situation. you just need to grab it by the horns and OWN IT.

3) develop and maintain realistic goals ane expectations. dont go into this thinking " if i dont sleep with 100 girls this weekend im a failure". Start slowwwwww. It took me a few years to develop my "mojo". so start with something like this: youre at a party. make it a SMALL goal to talk to X number of girls in the night, no matter how awkward or uncomfrtable it may be. Next weekend/ party, increase that number by 1, 5 10, whatever. this will help you work towards you BIGGER goal of getting laid. Example of a big goal: I want to get laid by the end of this semester". Use your small goal to work towards the bigger goal.

Best,

NONE

 

Yo dude keep doing nofap bro. After your brain gets rewired you wont care about lustful mating sex and will pursue a deep meaningful longterm relationship. This is so much more satisfying and your primitive sexual urges, desperation, and self doubt will all fade. Trust me on this you gotta experience it to believe it - do HC no PMO 90 days and you wont care about getting laid anymore. Your perspective on love changes you become a new person. Im living proof.

 

I don't know how much ur into porn but I've seen this a lot in working with 1000s of men over the years. Ur subconscious values the fantasy and kick so strongly that most likely u are NOT being present with the women u are meeting...u keep self-sabotaging b/c the porn conditioning and fantasy is simply the stronger value and program of attraction. Being virgin can be an 'extra' block but relax.

Porn is the major reason men have anxiety with women in 'real' (physical) reality. U are very young still anyways and there are virgins who are much older with even MORE conditioning.

To accelerate the process u can start doing Natural Grounding and value women flirting and being into you (which is the path of NATURAL attraction/seduction). Many men have replaced porn with Natural Grounding and it accelerates the process of connection with real women while getting them out of porn addiction and fantasy attachment.