My death grip possibly cured after 6 months. Thank you nofap!

But before the relapse you cured it.. ?

 

Good on ya mate, what a great start into the new Year

We are quite similar actually and i would sign that sentence as well. For guys like us it is imperative to have a girl we can connect with, otherwise the anxiety will always be there to some extend. The only reason why i had such an amazing time with the only girl i've been with sexually is because i knew she is good for me and i felt 100% comfortable and relaxed with her.
And she never forced or pressured me in any way. She was exactly what i needed and want from a girl/woman.

But we choose our partners, and in a way, we are very responsible of picking the right one for us.

And Optimum Fortitude. I am really curious on how you relapsed. There is so much shit going on mentally that stops us from having an amazing time.

I tried the coconut oil and will probably use it every evening before going to bed, and at some point, i am going to sensitize my dick with really light touch and slow strokes again. It feels like if i don't do that, it will just remember that if i touch it, it still needs the hard grip to stay hard and eventually orgasm. I am just going to imagine kissing the girl ive had such an amazing time with, because i want to rewire my brain to something more beautiful when i it comes to touching my dick. Or maybe even just stroking her cheek, something that is just way more about the connection and the energy between two people, rather then reduced to the physical act

 

Thanks for the reply. Make this year the one where you climb out of that whole brother

 

I was making progress. I was able to O with condom on more and more easily the more I was having intercourse. But I still had PA and ED.

That was 4 years ago. I relapsed because it was a toxic relationship and things didnt work out. After that I got sucked back in the addiction.

 

what is PA?

 

Performance Anxiety: when you can't get it up because you are too anxious to fail or not be able to perform correctly. It's often porn-induced.

 

I've had this to a lesser degree as well. I could get it up, but not everytime i would have liked to. Its really a shitty feeling, seriously. It makes you feel like there is something wrong with you and that just makes it worse.

Only the right woman, someone loving and caring can really assist you and help you with that. Its also really good to see who is good for us and who isnt.

And i can see how you fell beck into the addiction, it can be super hard after a breakup. I try to see woman only as a bonus now. When i find one i really like, i do a shitload of character tests first. If i find any red flags, i am not going to date her, no matter how beautiful she is. It saves so much time in the long run.
And sex can be something really beautiful. We shouldnt have to worry whether we are able to perform. That word is fucking ugly in regards to sleeping with each other.
Its a shame society turned it into a competition, jeezus

 

Hi guys,

I have also been using the death grip for a while and have also noticed that I have DE... have probably been using the death grip on and off for 2 to 3 years with some no PMO streaks in between.

I am also circumcised, so I am going to follow @troyan suggestions on using coconut oil to soften the skin of my glans to regain sensitivity! I am actually glad he posted his success story and his progress in detail, i really related to his story.

Do uncircumcised guys also develop death grip and DE?

 

Yes.

 

Thanks for the response - I should have guessed there would be no difference

 

I am using the coconut oil every day since i started reading this threat while also being on no porn and no orgasm. My dick has become noticeably more sensible to touch already and that will probably continue. I actually am using some days of the week to M with super soft touch and strokes, no porn and next to 0 imagination, to make sure the sensitivity doesnt go down too much. I dont want to get to the point where i can only last 2 minutes because my dick is too sensible.

I am going to try out the left hand with super light touch to see if i could get to orgasm this way or not. I wont O, but i want to know if i could. That would be an improvement on being able to stay hard and to O of around 100-150%. Before i started not watching porn and not to orgasm, i couldnt come without a strong grip and fast movements.
That shit is DRAMATICALLY better aleady.

And Its ED. Erectile Dysfunction.

 

DE stands for Delayed Ejaculation

 

TOUCHE! I apologize.
I learn something new every day.

 

Dear Fapstronaut,

I wish I had found this support site and this thread years ago. I must say that for more years than I can count, I have had no O with women. I could not explain my addiction to P even though I always have beautiful women giving me their body. I have made all the beautiful women, who loved me and were confident with their bodies prior to their sexual experience with me, to all become insecure. This made them worry if they were beautiful enough for me. And although I could help them O, they could not give me my O. This led to countless ruined relationships and a lot of heartbreaks. And made me dove deeper into my P addition to release my sexual frustration. And endless cycle of pain.

Currently, I am with the love of my life. I love her more than anything. My parents and her parents accept our relationship and know we plan to go the entire distance. However as you may have guessed, our first few weeks of our sexual engagements have led me to no O. Worse of, I even had ED due to my severe desensitization. This was so crushing for her that she cried all night. And like the all beautiful women prior, she questioned if she was beautiful enough for me. She IS. She is Perfect. She is more beautiful than any girl in P and she is real and yet my years of P and Deathgrip has led to this.

I opened up and explained to her my “disease” and that it is curable. Though I worry that I will not recover like everyone else has here. Regardless, I am committed and with everyone’s help from this thread, I hope to cure myself from this addiction and Deathgrip. I cannot loose her. She is the one. I want to be able to help her know she is the most beautiful woman. And the only one I want to spend the rest of my life with. And I want her to be secure about her perfect body. To never cry all night as she had before. And to never suggest I go find someone more attractive. I broke my heart because I had hurr her. She only wants to be the best for me as I to her.

Again, I wish I had discovered this site and thread years ago. This is only my 2nd day of no P. So to have read how others have gone 50+ days or 100 days without P is astonishing. And I am scared but I need to have the strength to do it, and I feel you guys are my support group.

It is encouraging that all the commentators here are so open and trusting of each other. It is truly exactly what I hope for. She is the love of my life. And it will be 50-100 more days before I assume to see any improvement (I hope).

I will continue to openly communicate with my woman about this disease and to reassure her that I will be cured for her.

Thank you

 

Hello,

Do not worry, and your woman can be reassured. After 30-60-90 days you will experience a significant difference. Patience is key, but give it a couple of monthz.

In the meantime, you should try Karezza with your girlfrisnd/fiancee. It's a sexual technic to be intimate with your partner without involvinf orgasm.

 

Thank you very much for your advice and reply. I am very appreciative.

My woman is more understanding now. I think talking openly was the hardest part. But she knows this disease is not something made up nor is it her fault.

I wish this thread could be the top 3 threads at the homepage. I think the addiction to P ultimately all leads to these sexual dysfunctional symptoms. And could be a good preventative measures to all other men unaware of this disease.

You are doing a good thing to bring this unknown disease of the modern internet era to the forefront.

 

Any other circumcised guys with a Deathgrip history been using coconut oil or similar to regain sensitivity? Any progress?

I'm thinking of starting it myself, although I have been using vaseline for the past few days to keep it moisturized...

 

I would like to add an additional insight concerning Delayed Ejaculation (DE).

This is indirectly connected to the deathgrip syndrom, but I am sure that sufferers share this common cause of delayed ejaculation (on top of deathgrip), namely: doing kegels to bring yourself close to orgasm really fast and then edge, and keeping and controling the edging via kegels.

Not only does it completely destroys the nerves of the penis due to a longer time of deathgrip, but I think it also destroys our pelvic floor muscles.

Lots of premature ejaculation sufferers have the opposing problem: they never do kegels and so their pelvic floor muscles are too weak. They do not control the pelvic muscles and thus don't control their ejaculations.

On the contrary, DE guys used to edging and being desensitized have difficulty cumming because they overused their PC muscles and cannot ejaculate naturally. They have to "force it out". If that makes sense.

Can anyone relate? @ReclaimedLife @RollerCoaster

Read about kegel exercises that they recommend for PE sufferers. Maybe I don't get what it really is but I'm pretty sure that's what I was doing everytime I was PMOing to control my edging better and keep Ming longer. Result: PC muscles destroyed, having to do kegels to cum, deathgrip and desensitized dick
Yeerpee!

I don't think Vaseline is useful. Vaseline is a good lubricant but doesn't have the healing properties that the oils (pure vegetal and organic) mentioned in this thread have. Your skin is supposed to absorb the oil/butter for deepskin repair.

By the way, I cleaned my dick earlier tonight and applied shea butter before going to bed. The sensitivity is already much stronger than 3 weeks ago.

 

First of all, i really enjoy hearing that it is becoming better for you, since i have a similar experience with coconut oil as well.

Secondly, I DONT think that kegels are bad. Its the prolonged masturbation with the deathgrip that is so bad.
Kegels are just making it worse. They are still a very good and healty exercise so you are able to withhold your ejaculation with a woman, even though it is TREMENDOUSLY more difficult because the real thing is just a different world then just masturbating.
With a woman, you are far more likely going to WANT to O once you are at that point.

I am still going to continue doing kegels as much as i can. Its just important to not just practice the contraction but also to conscioulsy relax.

 

Thanks for the insight @Optimum Fortitude - I will have a look at using shea butter as an option too! I agree about the Vaseline, it just forms a barrier against further drying out but doesn't promote deep tissue healing.