My 90 Days Porn Free; a guide to Exactly how to do it!

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by Resolved Oregonian, May 2, 2017.

  1. Resolved Oregonian

    Resolved Oregonian Fapstronaut

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    I did it! 90 days without pulling my pud, beating my meat, fapping, or choking the preacher! And no porn! And I did not just "squeak" through, I followed a very focused and intentional plan and not only came through this very strong, but as a better man. I will now outline what I did.

    I cannot fully articulate the inordinate amount of freedom I am feeling, as compared to the former life of bondage I was living with porn addiction. At the risk of sounding cliche, truly, I am living a remarkably different and empowered life. It is a life that was almost impossible to imagine under the dark clouds of depression, and hazy vision created by porn viewing.

    I hated my life, I hated myself, I was miserable, depressed, hopeless. I had sexual dysfunction issues (a problem getting erect and keeping it up).
    ......and now? I wake up every day with a purpose driven life, and the issues of my past have been resolved.

    How is it that I am walking in freedom? As I have posted in my other threads, I am a big proponent of a strong recovery plan. And not just a proponent of one, but I really believe that unless you create and practice a specific plan, you are not going to go porn free. I have an 8 step plan which I discuss in detail in other threads on my page. You can find an in-depth 8 step recovery plan process on the Porn Free Radio Podcast- episode 96.

    The longer I am porn free, the more I realize that freedom from pornography perhaps has no greater ally than to live a purpose driven life. The more I invest in growing my character, becoming a better man, and living a more intentioned life, the wider the gap between porn and I grow. Every single day I wake up and spend focused time The Miracle Morning routine, which involves investing in myself and growing to become a better human being. I do activities like reading, writing, positive affirmation, meditation, exercise, and the like. I spend about 100 minutes of daily time with these activities. I have also written about this routine in detail in other threads. But in brevity, these practices create a stronger character, which is exactly what we need if we are going to overcome pornography. In fact, my character has grown so much in the past 90 days, that not only does temptation to look at porn visit me so infrequently but when it does I have been easily able to say; "no" and move on. (most of the time)

    I remember a time, in the not so distant past when I was constantly overcome by porn, and I had this feeling of incessant defeat. Sometimes I viewed internet porn multiple times per day and hours per sitting. I looked at every type of porn imaginable. Over time, after I grew numb, I found that I continually needed "harder porn" in order to feel the same high I had gotten before from simpler genres. Most of the time I felt like I was in control of my issue, and that I could come and go whenever I wanted. That it was not having a significant negative impact on my life. That if I truly wanted to change than I could whenever I wanted. All of those were lies, and porn had me trapped.

    I constantly felt the pressure of shame and condemnation, like I was a habitual failure, and that I would never be free from the elusive and binding tentacles of addiction. I was in a paralyzed state of fear, constantly looking over my shoulder in paranoia, fearing I would get in trouble, or be exposed, and constantly focused on "avoiding" behavior that might lead to porn.

    There is a saying; "What you behold, is what you become." I was constantly focused on porn abstinence, my bad habits, my failures, porn addiction study, etc." The problem is that I was constantly focused on porn, instead of being focused on freedom. I should have been focused on the successful life I was wanting to live, and the specific steps regarding how to get there. If you are always focusing on porn recovery, then you will always be in recovery. And it's only a matter of time before you relapse. Recovery by definition is a means of mending an ailment that is intended to take place within a fixed time frame. It is not intended to be a commitment for the rest of your life. That is why there is a difference between "recovery" and "recovered".

    I consider myself "recovered". And my focus is not on how to "manage porn abstinence behavior", or; "avoidance techniques", and I am successful with abstinence as a result. Every single day I spend time focusing on success, the life I am working toward, how to get there, and then daily taking steps to move in that direction. I believe these are the keys to achieving a porn-free life.

    There are too many people who focus too much on the "problem", and not nearly enough time toward the "solution", and they relapse, time and time again. And will always relapse until they make this change. They focus on what not to do. They focus on "distraction" based activities. ie; cold showers, various hobbies, staying away from their homes, or any other number of various "crutches" that only band-aid a wound, and never provide true healing of the heart and brain. This behavior is inorganic, ignorant, and if we are being honest with ourselves, assinine. Common sense would ask you; "What happens when you run out of distractions and are confronted with the temptation to look at porn?" And the obvious answer is that person will relapse because they did not focus on changing the underlying issues causing them to look at porn in the first place. They did not replace their porn habit with habits just as powerful. They have not grown in character as a person. Unfortunately, distraction theory is also popular counsel on porn recovery communities, and yet, I have never talked to one person who has prioritized distraction/hobby based avoidance techniques who has gone porn free long-term.

    You cannot restructure your entire life around avoiding bad behavior, we must rather restructure our lives around behavior that is going to prosper a successful existence. Those are two polar opposite ways of living. One contains an inherent value that will garner success and the other toward failure.

    I am living the successful life of freedom that I had once only dreamed was possible, and you can do it too. Come with me on this journey!
     
    Last edited: May 2, 2017
  2. Resolved Oregonian

    Resolved Oregonian Fapstronaut

    181
    656
    93
    I did it! 90 days without pulling my pud, beating my meat, fapping, or choking the preacher! And no porn! And I did not just "squeak" through, I followed a very focused and intentional plan and not only came through this very strong, but as a better man. I will now outline what I did.

    I cannot fully articulate the inordinate amount of freedom I am feeling, as compared to the former life of bondage I was living with porn addiction. At the risk of sounding cliche, truly, I am living a remarkably different and empowered life. It is a life that was almost impossible to imagine under the dark clouds of depression, and hazy vision created by porn viewing.

    I hated my life, I hated myself, I was miserable, depressed, hopeless. I had sexual dysfunction issues (a problem getting erect and keeping it up).
    ......and now? I wake up every day with a purpose driven life, and the issues of my past have been resolved.

    How is it that I am walking in freedom? As I have posted in my other threads, I am a big proponent of a strong recovery plan. And not just a proponent of one, but I really believe that unless you create and practice a specific plan, you are not going to go porn free. I have an 8 step plan which I discuss in detail in other threads on my page. You can find an in-depth 8 step recovery plan process on the Porn Free Radio Podcast- episode 96.

    The longer I am porn free, the more I realize that freedom from pornography perhaps has no greater ally than to live a purpose driven life. The more I invest in growing my character, becoming a better man, and living a more intentioned life, the wider the gap between porn and I grow. Every single day I wake up and spend focused time The Miracle Morning routine, which involves investing in myself and growing to become a better human being. I do activities like reading, writing, positive affirmation, meditation, exercise, and the like. I spend about 100 minutes of daily time with these activities. I have also written about this routine in detail in other threads. But in brevity, these practices create a stronger character, which is exactly what we need if we are going to overcome pornography. In fact, my character has grown so much in the past 90 days, that not only does temptation to look at porn visit me so infrequently but when it does I have been easily able to say; "no" and move on. (most of the time)

    I remember a time, in the not so distant past when I was constantly overcome by porn, and I had this feeling of incessant defeat. Sometimes I viewed internet porn multiple times per day and hours per sitting. I looked at every type of porn imaginable. Over time, after I grew numb, I found that I continually needed "harder porn" in order to feel the same high I had gotten before from simpler genres. Most of the time I felt like I was in control of my issue, and that I could come and go whenever I wanted. That it was not having a significant negative impact on my life. That if I truly wanted to change than I could whenever I wanted. All of those were lies, and porn had me trapped.

    I constantly felt the pressure of shame and condemnation, like I was a habitual failure, and that I would never be free from the elusive and binding tentacles of addiction. I was in a paralyzed state of fear, constantly looking over my shoulder in paranoia, fearing I would get in trouble, or be exposed, and constantly focused on "avoiding" behavior that might lead to porn.

    There is a saying; "What you behold, is what you become." I was constantly focused on porn abstinence, my bad habits, my failures, porn addiction study, etc." The problem is that I was constantly focused on porn, instead of being focused on freedom. I should have been focused on the successful life I was wanting to live, and the specific steps regarding how to get there. If you are always focusing on porn recovery, then you will always be in recovery. And it's only a matter of time before you relapse. Recovery by definition is a means of mending an ailment that is intended to take place within a fixed time frame. It is not intended to be a commitment for the rest of your life. That is why there is a difference between "recovery" and "recovered".

    I consider myself "recovered". And my focus is not on how to "manage porn abstinence behavior", or; "avoidance techniques", and I am successful with abstinence as a result. Every single day I spend time focusing on success, the life I am working toward, how to get there, and then daily taking steps to move in that direction. I believe these are the keys to achieving a porn-free life.

    There are too many people who focus too much on the "problem", and not nearly enough time toward the "solution", and they relapse, time and time again. And will always relapse until they make this change. They focus on what not to do. They focus on "distraction" based activities. ie; cold showers, various hobbies, staying away from their homes, or any other number of various "crutches" that only band-aid a wound, and never provide true healing of the heart and brain. This behavior is inorganic, ignorant, and if we are being honest with ourselves, assinine. Common sense would ask you; "What happens when you run out of distractions and are confronted with the temptation to look at porn?" And the obvious answer is that person will relapse because they did not focus on changing the underlying issues causing them to look at porn in the first place. They did not replace their porn habit with habits just as powerful. They have not grown in character as a person. Unfortunately, distraction theory is also popular counsel on porn recovery communities, and yet, I have never talked to one person who has prioritized distraction/hobby based avoidance techniques who has gone porn free long-term.

    You cannot restructure your entire life around avoiding bad behavior, we must rather restructure our lives around behavior that is going to prosper a successful existence. Those are two polar opposite ways of living. One contains an inherent value that will garner success and the other toward failure.

    I am living the successful life of freedom that I had once only dreamed was possible, and you can do it too. Come with me on this journey!
     
    Rhys0, john wheel, Lemonado and 2 others like this.
  3. Reading this really inspired me to hold off of the internet, thank you!
     
    Resolved Oregonian likes this.
  4. jack barnard

    jack barnard Fapstronaut

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    Wow this inspired me so much, thanks so much for putting the time and effort into this post, even with 13 days having gone past I can feel the coils around me loosening slowly, and I can't wait for the day that I will no longer be under the spell of porn and all its damage it has done to me in the past!
     
  5. tkdguy

    tkdguy Fapstronaut

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    Congratulations! I've ready many of your posts throughout your journey, and they have helped me a lot. I'm very happy for you! You're a real inspiration! Keep it up. A PMO free life will be amazing. Thank you so much.
     
  6. YngwieWanksteen

    YngwieWanksteen Fapstronaut

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    Congratulations! Thanks for taking time to give!
     
    Resolved Oregonian likes this.
  7. 5even9ix

    5even9ix Fapstronaut

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    Very helpful post, thank you for sharing!
     
    Resolved Oregonian likes this.
  8. Sanc-Hos

    Sanc-Hos Fapstronaut

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    Congratulation bro!
    This is very encouraging. Go for more!
     
    Resolved Oregonian likes this.

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