Maybe we don't need to quit completely, just be healthy!

@lolas I can relate to your perspective as I recently had the same scenario - going on holiday with a girl, so quit beforehand to try and ensure I was more potent when I got on holiday with her. Aaaand it did work, I was in good shape, had been working out and exercising loads.

My problem was when I got back, after a week, I failed and binged on the same old fetish stuff :-(

I think keeping healthy physically will help big time, and i agree if you do relapse, there are some images/videos that are far worse for you psychologically than others. I think you're right in setting more achievable targets sometimes - start by not resorting to the things that damage you the most if you can.

My feeling is that in tandem with the P-addiction, there can also be a fetish addiction. For me in my head, it is now a double battle because when i do relapse, it's eventually back onto the same 'unrealistic' stuff that has more negative emotion attached to it.

 

@lolas Thanks for sharing. I agree with you and @Longtime27 that you need to stay physically fit, and set reasonable targets. However, I don't think that you should allow yourself any type of arousing content. It could be different for you, but, personally, having tried to end the addiction for a couple of years now, I've come to a point where it is clear to me that I have to quit completely.

I used to attempt quitting by setting up a couple of ground rules, like only using images, no videos, only using softcore, only going on one website, limiting myself to only an hour, 30 minutes...I have tried many 'lesser evil' kind of rules and they have always lead me back to where I started. I think that, in principle, setting some clear rules may sound like a good idea, but if you're addicted to something more, your brain will know better and use the slightest weakness to get what it wants. It knows exactly what to do to trick you. That's how it goes with me at least, and that's why I know now that my only option is to stop completely and that I must avoid fapping as well. I know that if I'm trying to convince myself of anything else, I'm lying to myself. For me, allowing any type of mature content is like letting the trojan horse in.

Again, I can only speak for myself, but I thought I'd share my experience.

Let us know how it goes!

 

Definitely agree here, I developed my own routine, years ago, that did nothing but prolong my addiction, it was a trap from my brain saying, I want to quit P/M but still be allowed to use P/M. Develop some accountability with yourself, and you can put together longer streaks. And from my experience so far, the benefits to letting the addiction die is worth it.

 

There is simple way to tell when pornography is abused or when masturbation is abused.
If one uses pornography specifically to feel pleasure or uses masturbation specifically to feel pleasure - it is being abused.
Using porn for pleasure is when one watches a video without intention to actually have sexual experience, instead one just wants to feel a high it bring. Opening porn when it should not be opened like during work day, just to look and get a hit. When it is clear person just wants a "hit" and not sexual satisfaction - its abuse problem.

When masturbation and pornography are used to satisfy one sexually and it does not go on for 2 hours - it is not abuse.

It is ok to have a beer occasionally after work, but we all know there is a problem when one gets a beer at 1pm at work. Same thing pretty much