1. Welcome to NoFap! We have disabled new forum accounts from being registered for the time being. In the meantime, you can join our weekly accountability groups.
    Dismiss Notice

Married before 2 years.. now age 29...addiction from age 13.. no sex till now.. due to PIED

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by thestuckintellectual, May 24, 2018.

  1. thestuckintellectual

    thestuckintellectual Fapstronaut

    6
    2
    3
    Hi all,

    I am married. It has been 2 years. I was addicted to masturbation from age 13. Since last 10 years I am addicted to hard core porn. I am on the verge of Divorce. I have known that I have this condition even before marriage. I couldn't resist porn since I was working at a distant location. Used to come to home only on weekends. Now I have quit my job. My wife had it all. She doesnt talk to me now. She doesn't even look at my face now. She thinks I don't like her. In a way she is correct. If I had loved her enough, then I would have taken action to recover from this from day one since I realised I have this condition. But the fact is that I had a lot of triggers in my working place. Now that I am home, I am in much control.

    I started seriously NoFap on April 30th. Today is May 24th. In between I have relapsed two times. Now also just before joining this forum I was looking at hot videos in YouTube. But I want to end this. I want to end this forever. That is why I am joining here.
     
    DfarmC and Deleted Account like this.
  2. Hi. Welcome to forum!

    Make sure you crate a personal journal thread in Reboot Logs section and blog there on a regular basis. As well as just generally be active participant in various forum discussions. I recommend this to everybody new here because it's the major thing that helped me when I was first starting. Just lurking on forums, reading and learning is great. But it usually is so much more powerful to engage. It helps to keep us motivated and accountable when we are active part of community. And keeps this in front of our minds so we don't forget about importance of it and slip away in our old habits. Sharing is also therapeutic. This is a major reason why AA meetings work so good. But that was developed before internet era. These days we can get most of the same benefits online through communities like this. So don't underestimate the power of active participation.

    I would also like to suggest you to look into mindfulness meditation. It has helped me personally tremendously to learn how to deal with urges. It takes a while to get good at it and notice results, so you need to be consistent with it, but once you do it's very powerful. It has been used by sages for thousands of years to deal with various issues of the mind. And in recent decades the science is also catching up to what ancient sages have know for centuries. Meditation these days are widely used as very effective tool by psychologists for treating addiction and by neurologists for supporting recovery of the brain. It is a great exercise for the brain the same way as jogging is great exercise for the body. Check out this Ted talk, it gives a good idea of what's it about when it comes to philosophy. As far as practical side of it there is this awesome smartphone app called Headspace for guided meditations to get you started.

    Wish you lot's of strength and success in your reboot journey!
     
    Recoverypeace likes this.
  3. thestuckintellectual

    thestuckintellectual Fapstronaut

    6
    2
    3
    Thank you Serpant of Fire. I will keep logging.
     
  4. DfarmC

    DfarmC Fapstronaut

    33
    31
    18
    I know this is tough for you. I'm so proud of you for coming to NoFap and joining the community. Porn IS addictive. I hate that I've been into porn since I was 12 years (similar to you). But, I am so thankful that I have found this community to be with during my own detox from lies (i.e. porn). I am so sad to know that you and your wife are having problems due to your porn addiction/masturbation. I sincerely hope that your marriage doesn't end in divorce.

    One thing I keep telling myseslf is that relapse isn't failure... so long as you keep starting over. You will get past the initial few days. You can do this!

    Welcome to the club. I am with you... I want to end this forever.
     

Share This Page